Posts Tagged ‘Unsupportive energy’

Exhausted? In Pain? Migraines?

December 12, 2022

We may feel tired or extremely fatigued from hard work or putting in long hours, but exhaustion comes from emotions. Exhaustion stems from suppressing worries, anger, fear, and concerns, often telling ourselves we’ll deal with them later. But we don’t. By stuffing and not looking at them, we emotionally sabotage ourselves.

Dragging ourselves home from work may result from not dealing with the stress of situations or associating with certain people. Exhaustion at home may occur by not wanting to admit what our feelings are trying to tell us and that something needs to change.

We can exhaust ourselves from not wanting to look at the reasons we feel pain or fear.


I was present at the moment a woman made a connection about her unfulfilling relationship with her father.  As a little girl, she regularly hit her head against the wall rather than face that emotional pain.

As an adult in her twenties, she no longer hit her head. Instead she had migraines. Although painful, migraines were easier for her to deal with than looking at the pain she felt from being emotionally abandoned by her father.

Note: Please continue to the end to read another perspective on migraines and exhaustion in the BONUS below.


People sometimes drive themselves through grueling physical activity, long work hours or constant busyness rather than looking at the pain and frustration they feel about negative experiences or things their parents did or didn’t do, revealing their personal bogeyman or why they tolerate intolerable situations and people now. 

If you’re exhausted or in pain and torment yourself about how you feel because of it, you have a good excuse reason not to think, change your perspective and discover that there are better options available to you.

Here are examples of underlying fears that may drive you.

  • If I leave my job/ spouse, I won’t have enough money.
  • If I leave my church/ social circle, I’ll be all alone.
  • If I stop being so busy, I’ll have to slow down and look at what kind of a life I have – the people, circumstances, drama, unfulfilling work, my fears, my lack, my body, my very happiness and so on.

Another emotional payoff might include the sympathy and attention others give you. Pain, illness or exhaustion can become a badge of courage… “You’re exhausted from what you’re going through, you poor thing.”

Pain’s survival depends on part of us remaining unconscious. This is how it continues to hold power over us. This is what causes us to relive variations of emotionally charged situations repeatedly.

Because our spirit desires a release of unsupportive energy, we continue to attract similar situations (even if they suck). They serve as opportunities for us to wake up and be free.

If we avoid releasing unsupportive energy, we look to gain power elsewhere. We settle for jobs, relationships and unsatisfying lives. This is exhausting.

Had enough? Where are you losing your power? Who or what did you give your power to?

A first step to freedom is self-awareness, and sometimes it helps to ask for help to see our blind spots as well as learn new ways to release energy that doesn’t serve us.

Edited excerpt from August 30, 2021, Soulgoals’ post.


BONUS! 

MIGRAINES, EXHAUSTION and MORE

Alert: This may go against everything you believe to be helpful and good.

When we emotionally feel sorry for or bad about others going through challenges or try to save them from their suffering, we energetically tie into their pain. We plug our energy circuitry into their emotions and how they feel, aligning ourselves with their vibrational wavelength.

Any suffering we alleviate by doing this doesn’t help them to learn their lessons and actually holds them back.

Empaths (people who feel others’ feelings as if they are their own) can unconsciously take on others’ pain, illness, lack, confusion, stress, depression and fatigue. That kind of sensitivity can be exhausting.

Ever feel good and then drained after talking with certain people?

Here’s another consideration. Do you think someone is a headache or a pain in your neck or another part of your lower anatomy? Well, that literally can be what happens to you.

Are you struggling, stuck, have issues? Know someone around you that often feels the same? They may, for example, struggle in one way, you in another. It’s still struggling. Maybe you unintentionally took on what they’re going through.

A woman volunteered as a leader to help the homeless. While we talked she had a realization. Since riding in a car with others from her church and their negative chatter for a couple of hours to visit this community, she hadn’t closed one deal in six months! She decided to drive her own car and started closing deals.

Another example, people who don’t drink might be dealing with an alcoholic family member. However, both may be dealing with fear but coping in different ways. One drinks and the other lives in fears like expecting the worse to happen.

Look for similar feelings not identical circumstances. 

Warning! If you try to share ideas before others are ready to understand, they can turn on you and make you the bad guy. People often filter information based on their past experiences and resist believing that another perspective is valid.

So how can you help? Be compassionate. Acknowledge them and where they’re at non-judgmentally. Communicate how you believe in them and their ability to get through their circumstances. But no pity, feeling sorry for them or meeting them at their emotional level of drama.

Again, you’re not uplifting others while feeling troubled about them. And you may be opening yourself to take on what they’re going through.

It works in reverse, too. Being around positive people aligns you vibrationally to live your personal and professional dreams.



Would you like to learn how to release unwanted energy?

Contact me to learn how at
virginia@soulgoals.com

I help women to tune into their true Selves, see life clearly and live their personal and professional dreams.

Copyright © 2022 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

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Exhausted? Losing Your Power?

August 30, 2021

Soulgoal Missive, Year 2, No.1, originally puclished in 2002


I cannot emphasize this point strongly enough: the targets to which acquisitioners connect their energy circuits are people or objects to which they have surrendered their power – specifically, the power to control them.

CAROLYN MYSS, Anatomy of the Spirit


I still felt exhausted and light-headed three months, $1000, and seven practitioners later. Adrenal burnout created chronic fatigue, and I couldn’t get a handle on it.  The healing work brought an underlying physical strength but not enough to impact my daily life. The only business I could manage was what was absolutely necessary.

One weekend my energy and head cleared. I was enthusiastic until I met with a client on Monday, and my thinking relapsed into a heavy fog. I had enough and drew the line as I realized this wasn’t about my health. 

I decided it was time to get to the underlying cause.

A friend suggested I was in a transformational process that could create a breakthrough. She told me about a book Anatomy of the Spirit by Carolyn Myss, which is about health and energy.  I had so little of either it seemed a logical place to look, even though I didn’t see how it would help.

If we don’t recognize that our source of energy comes from within, we look outside ourselves to find it. That could be a person (as found in co-dependent relationships or even someone we respect), a business or organization (when we think our source of money or salvation can only come from an outside source), a substance (such as alcohol, drugs, coffee, or cigarettes), or belief systems (ideas we believe to be true).

Instead of trusting a divine source or ourselves, we believe something outside of us is stronger. By doing so, we give away our power and allow it to control us.

I sat at the computer and wrote what I felt: “Where am I plugging in my energy circuits?Emotionally to something outside myself. Not a person or an idea, but a belief.” 

The answer popped out. To be more visible in my business and speak my truth, people might not like what I have to say. Society would then ostracize me, and I was afraid to have that happen.

In that moment of discovery, the left side of my head instantly cleared!

Recognizing this was the right track, I knew if I opened the book to any page it would give me the insight that I needed to clear the other side of my head.

The light bulb moment began with the thought, “On the right side, I’m short-circuited with fear.”

I realized that in the back of my mind I thought I would never accomplish a deeply cherished goal. This belief froze me into inaction through fear and disappointment. 

“I’m not acknowledging all is in divine order. My will is motivated by fear and a lack of control.  I need to connect my head and heart and allow Thy will not my will be done.”

Poof! Like magic, the right side of my head cleared. Reignited by this new awareness, my energy and clear-headedness returned and didn’t leave.

How could these beliefs affect my body and mind with such devastating results?

If you saw a friend about to cut her wrists or jump off a bridge, wouldn’t you do whatever you could to sabotage her efforts?

Unbeknownst to me, I held a fearful belief of being disapproved of – I was unconsciously imagining the worst about what would happen if people didn’t like what I had to say.

That belief affected me emotionally by doing all it could to prevent me from what it perceived a certain death, death to my ego and the pain it created. That belief, created as a child, did what it thought was protecting me and keeping me safe.

It didn’t matter if the belief was true; unconsciously I believed it and acted as if it was real.

If I felt too exhausted to work, I’d be safe because I wouldn’t be able to share my viewpoints. I wouldn’t be visible for people to disapprove of me and experience some harmful fate.

I know this can sound convoluted and weird, but many of our limiting beliefs were created when we were kids using limited logic. Read on to see what I mean.

Exhaustion comes from emotions.

We may feel tired or extremely fatigued from hard work or putting in long hours, but exhaustion comes from emotions. Exhaustion stems from suppressing worries, anger, fear, and concerns, often telling ourselves we’ll deal with them later. But we don’t. By stuffing and not looking at them, we emotionally sabotage ourselves.

Dragging ourselves home from work may result from not dealing with the stress of associating with certain people or situations. Exhaustion at home may occur by not wanting to admit something needs to change.

We can exhaust ourselves from not wanting to look at the reasons we feel pain or fear.

A woman once told me about her unfulfilling relationship with her father.  As a little girl she regularly hit her head against the wall rather than face that emotional pain.

Now in her twenties, she no longer hits her head. Instead she gets migraines. Althoughpainful, migraines were easier for her to deal with than looking at the pain she felt from being emotionally abandoned by her father.

People sometimes drive themselves through grueling physical activity, constant busyness, or hellish, military training rather than look at the pain and frustration they feel about their parents or past, negative experiences. It’s often easier to focus on the body and its needs while flying under one’s emotional radar.

We can identify with pain, illness, or exhaustion, even turning it into a badge of courage. This seems easier than facing what lies beneath the surface, as the survival of the pain depends on remaining unconscious.

Our shadow self is afraid to allow the light of awareness to be shined on it. The dark side wants to remain hidden so it won’t be found out, fearing a fate worse than death.

As long as we continue to unconsciously identify with the pain rather than look at it and let it go, it continues to hold power over us. This is what causes us to relive variations of emotionally charged situations repeatedly.

The situations change but the underlying feelings of fear, pain or fill-in-the-blank emotion are close to the same way we felt during the original affront.

Our spirit desires a release of unsupportive energy. That’s why it continues to draw to us similar situations (even if they suck) so we can wake up and be free.

The reason we are afraid of it so much is that we created this fearful part as a child. These emotions feel natural and familiar tinged with a childlike dread that we’ve learned to suppress and live with over the years.

Imagine a helpless youngster dealing with a challenging, life situation. Obviously, coping and life skills are limited. Fear takes over. If we haven’t resolved these childhood impressions, they can continue to haunt us until we gain perspective and release their energy.

If we avoid releasing that unsupportive energy, we look for our power elsewhere while feeling inadequate to manage on our own. We settle for jobs, relationships, and unsatisfying lives. This is exhausting.

Do you feel exhausted? Covid getting you down? Had enough? Where are you losing your power? Who or what did you give your power to?

A first step to freedom is self-awareness, and sometimes asking for help to perceive the blind spots and see. 



Ready to identify and let go of limiting beliefs
and feelings that hold you back?
Contact me for a free consultation at:
virginia@soulgoals.com

I work with people who choose to share
their gifts or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck or could 
use new tools or support.

I help them ignite their Soul’s goals
and be richly compensated doing what
they love.

Copyright © 2021 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.