Posts Tagged ‘Trust yourself’

Trust Herself or Experts? Life or Death in the Delivery Room.

May 6, 2019

 

Delivery rooms can be highly charged environments containing the potential of life or death.

While going through a particularly hard labor during the birth of her second child, my friend was directed to push.

The attendants’ attitudes and firm voices basically told her, we know you’re tired, but stop being so lazy and push. By the fourth and fifth time of asking her to push, they raised their voices and got abusive and angrier.  Don’t be such a baby and a wimp. PUSH!

My friend refused, in spite of what the experts demanded her to do. At one point she told them, “I won’t push.”

Finally, the doctor checked the cord and learned it was coiled around her baby’s neck. He had to physically go in and cut it loose. The baby was born blue and not breathing. They gave him mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. He survived and was healthy.

The mother later asked the doctor that if she had pushed when everyone said, would she have strangled her baby. He replied, “Yes.”

The mom was the ultimate expert at the moment. She was aware of her body and inner guidance and followed it, although she didn’t know why. She knew she wouldn’t push regardless of what others told her. If she had, the ending of that story wouldn’t be happy.

Her first baby was born at home, by choice, and that delivery was smooth and easy.

Her second baby was different. At night, after hard labor started, she thought how easy it would be to have the baby at home. But because they planned a hospital birth, she went through the motions to fulfill that plan.

She said if she followed her guidance in the first place, what her mother’s intuition told her, she wouldn’t have gone through the agonizing labor, uterine exhaustion and subsequent complications for her baby.

The lesson?  Trust herself. She didn’t need to placate others and what they wanted, regardless of who they are, but instead take a stand for her baby and herself.

Is there an aspect of your life where you’ve been giving your power to others by following their advice instead of trusting yourself?

Ready to do what you love in a Bigger way,
but you don’t trust yourself?

Contact me for a complimentary
Do What You Love Break Free Session.

Email me at:
virginia@soulgoals.com

I work with people
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.

I help them be richly compensated
doing what they love by discovering
their Soul’s goals.

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Do You REALLY Want What You Think You Want?

November 27, 2017

 

mirage2f

Want water or a mirage?

 

 

A woman, at a presentation I gave, told me how she was dreading an upcoming holiday.

She and her husband would soon divorce, and he would be with another woman, not with her and the children.

I inquired about their past, holiday celebrations. Were they fun, heart-warming, family times?

Oh no. Those were never happy times. He was usually drunk, and since she became sober, the two of them were even more distant.

What she wanted so dearly wasn’t that man during the holiday but a loving, family gathering.

Yet, she mourned the idea of not spending the holiday together — a lovely idea that didn’t exist at the best of times.

After a brief discussion, she was able to let go of her faulty idea that she’d be missing a wonderful, family experience, one they never had.

When she put this in perspective, her suffering stopped.

Later while in my Resolved for Results program, she was able to see more clearly.

Instead of the misery she felt previously, she became happily divorced. She realized she didn’t want a broken family with a person who had neither the interest nor ability to be part of a loving family.

In its place, she designed her ideal, family situation… and manifested it!

Sometimes we get an image of what we think we want and try to superimpose it on a current situation; we try to make it work — even though what’s happening doesn’t match up with what we REALLY want.

Same is true in relationships and business– people fall in love with an idea instead of the actual person or livelihood.

How can you know what you really want?

In Resolved for Results, I make the distinction this way:

“The soul of your goal satisfies the true intention of your objective. You feel fulfilled and happy when you achieve a goal that has the essence of what you choose and frustrated or disappointed when you don’t.”

Mirages are illusions that look real but ultimately are unfulfilling. They only will frustrate and disappoint when you get closer to them and see them for what they are.

A definition of mirage is something that appears real or possible but in fact isn’t actually so.

Often people chase mirages because they convince themselves they’re the real deal. Mirages look like water. They need and want water. So it’s water.

It reminds me of a woman who laughingly commented on her marriage. Prince Charming became Prince Alarming.

People see what they want to see. Most are happy with their illusions until they get close enough to see that the water was just a mirage.


Here’s why this is good news:

  • You can more clearly discern what you really want when you see what you don’t want,
  • You can change emotional habits, such as feeling disappointed, depressed, angry, frustrated, worried, or being down on yourself or others about what’s not working. Habits and beliefs are just patterns of thoughts and feelings that can shift.
  • You can train your mind to focus on what you really want instead of being fixated on what you don’t want.
  • You can learn how to trust yourself and use your feelings as a GPS.
  • You can enhance your practice of gratitude. (A footnote to my last post on continuous gratitude. I’ve been practicing this for a while, although I slip in and out of this habit. When I focus on continuous gratitude, no matter what, things always work out!)

You have power in your clarity.

Even if you realize that what you thought you wanted is out of alignment with what you really want, you can now redirect your focus. Because of your new focus, you can manifest something better than you ever imagined!

By the way, if you reach the conclusion that you’re wrong, you screwed up and think beating yourself up will whip you back in shape, think again.

This thinking is a mirage.

Life is designed as a learning experience, which aids your growth. It’s not created with the purpose of disapproving of you. So don’t should on yourself.

It’s all good, including you!

 

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy this post? Please share.

I work with people, at any age,
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.

I help them be richly compensated
doing what they love by aligning
with their Soul’s goals.

Copyright © 2017 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved.

Who Do You Believe More – You or Others? 

November 13, 2017

break free - believe

Recently while flying, I sat next to a woman who was miserable and distraught because she needed to change, but she didn’t know how or what to do. 

A junk business was dumped on her that she had no interest in but had to run for the last five years. She wanted out of a long-term, unhappy marriage where most of their time was spent fighting. Before our conversation, she had zero clarity of direction and no idea at all what to do for income if she left. Plus, they had so much debt that she felt trapped with few options available.

It soon became obvious how she cornered herself. She had a multitude of flawed beliefs that she clung to and wasn’t open to seeing other perspectives… even though these ideas were holding her back!

She was adamant that she couldn’t believe in herself because she, like all people, are transgressors, and her head was filled with negative self-talk.

I asked her if she couldn’t believe in herself, how would she be able to trust what God wanted her to do? She was the one who was listening and watching for a sign, and she proclaimed herself to be untrustworthy.

She lived in fear, unhappiness, frustration, confusion and hopelessness. Her hamster-wheel thinking lacked clarity, and her life mirrored her misguided notions.

Society grooms us not to trust or believe in ourselves. Instead, we’ve been trained in self-doubt and to believe we’re wrong.

We’ve been taught to elevate the opinion of others and feel helpless compared to the power of spiritual forces, experts, leaders, books, spouses, family, friends, bosses, teachers, doctors, world events and even TV commercials.

However, if we don’t learn to trust and believe in ourselves, we’ll be at the mercy of the whims and, very often, limited ideas of others.



If you think there’s something wrong with you, you’ll attract experiences to validate that your beliefs are true.

If you shift your perspective to see yourself as a divine child of God or the holy spirit, or a child of an unlimited universe, you open yourself to receive greater abundance, success, love, happiness and health. 

97% of human bodies are made of stardust, and an analysis of over 150,000 stars in our Milky Way galaxy proved this is literally true.

The Crosby, Stills & Nash song was right: “We are stardust, we are golden. We are billion year old carbon.”

So stop making yourself small. Your heritage is divinely celestial! 

If you don’t believe in you, why should anyone else?

If you don’t believe in you, how will you be able to tune in to your inner guidance, the sweet whispers of direction from within? How will you be able to distinguish it from the nagging voice in your head of fear, worry, doubt and self-belittlement?

If you’re waiting for others, many who live by flawed beliefs, to recognize your worth, you may be better served by going within to recognize your value.

If others don’t believe in themselves, they aren’t capable of fully believing in you.


Be vigilant about how you picture yourself.

Do you see yourself as not good enough? Can you see how your life would change if you believed you have access to infinite possibilities, even if you don’t have a clue as to how to manifest them?

Right now, breathe and take a moment for yourself. Breathe and go beyond the chatter of others and your thoughts.

The more you practice this, the more you’ll discover your self-worth and that you are deeply loved.

When you tap into this essence of you, you’ll feel good about yourself.

When you feel good about yourself, you open to receive abundance and success as you go beyond lack– lack of love, money, time, health, business, fun, acceptance, respect and happiness.

And you believe in you!

This is why I created the Liberation of Lunacy (LoL technique), because when the ego is in charge, and limiting beliefs only come from the ego, we’re all a little bit crazy.

When your ego is in charge, you can’t see a way out.

When your essence is in charge, you tap into an infinite source within. You trust and believe in yourself.

You’re golden.

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy this post? Please share.


I work with people, at any age,
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.

I help them be richly compensated
doing what they love by aligning
with their Soul’s goals.

TIP: The Happier Choice

June 7, 2016

anger

A man tried to passive-aggressively manipulate a woman, by attempting to get her to doubt herself, so she would do what he wanted.

An insecure woman controls her friend’s behavior by using her illness and fearful threats of taking away something he needs. He goes along with it because the intimidation clouds his ability to believe in himself and that he can find a solution elsewhere.

A therapist got angry with a peer who didn’t buy into her fear-based bullying which she communicated by demeaning words, raised voice, blaming others and mocking tone.

When change occurs, some people feel they’re losing control. It can feel as if their very life is threatened, and they’ll do whatever it takes to survive.

Chances are the perpetrators won’t see or believe what they’re doing.

Stand at arm’s length if you try to tell them lest they throw a punch. Ever hear the adage about not trying to teach a pig how to fly? A pig can’t fly, and you’ll just irritate the pig.

Yes, forgive them for they know not what they do… and take care of yourself! You have a responsibility to be steward of YOUR life.

You have a choice to be a follower of someone else’s fears and expectations, and give away your power, or think for yourself.

You won’t be truly happy unless you follow the rhythm of your own drum.

In avoiding dealing with situations like these (and there are countless variations), you might believe that when the people disappear into the sunset, it will be happy trails forever more. Not true.

Unless you address your “stuff,” you carry this vibration, these feelings, in your energy field. You’ll attract more of the same type of people and experiences in the future, even if your current situation goes away.

Why?

Life offers you opportunities to grow, release what’s not serving you and be free.

What does this have to do with you and your goals?

If you succumb to fear, you may find yourself doubting your ability to be richly compensated doing what you love.

You deserve much more.

Your TIP is to make the happier choice.

  • Trust yourself. Listen to the voice within and what your gut is telling you. Don’t elevate others’ opinions over your own.
  • Believe in your Self. YOU have a hotline to the Divine. Don’t diss that connection by letting others convince you that they know what’s good for you more than you do.
  • Don’t give away your power to fear and self-doubt (others or your own).

How can you do this?

  • Make choices on your behalf instead of trying to please people or kowtowing to fear. Your choices matter. You matter.
  • Listen to your inner guidance. Even if you’ve been ignoring it for a while doesn’t mean your spirit isn’t available 24/7 to give you nudges as well as to light up the best direction for you to take.
  • Pay attention to how you feel not to what you think you should do based on others’ opinions. Let good-feeling mojo be your guide.
  • Be in the now. The ego will have you long for or regret the past or be afraid of future what-ifs and worse-case scenarios. In the present, you can change your thinking and handle anything. Your power is in this moment.
  • Anticipate the best! Why not? It’s the attitude that brings positive results.

You can achieve your dreams in ways that surpass your wildest imagination. However, you must be a vibrational match to them.

Fear, manipulation, doubt and worry create more of the same. None of these are real.

Remember your Source, the real You, and make the happier choice: loving, supportive, creative, growing, free and in the Now.

Remember this, and you’re unstoppable!

Do you know people you think might benefit from my TIP? Please share. If this TIP offers you insight into squirrely situations, please subscribe.

 

TIP: Defy the Odds. She Lives!

May 10, 2016

IMG_3390 (2)

In my last TIP, I asked people to send love to my cat Micha.

It worked.

Your energy helped her cross the chasm from pain and a seemingly assured, immediate passing to, quite miraculously, staying in the land of the living.

 

Her ordeal brought up questions.

Why, I thought, did she become so ill at midnight on Saturday when there was little I could do – like she did late Saturday night, December 26? Repeated other times, too, this was a pattern.

Then, I realized, it’s because I couldn’t do anything.

She needed time to rebound, and if I had a choice to rush her to the vet, I might come to the wrong conclusion. She wasn’t ready to go. How soon or late that will be is her choice.

She has an innate sense of timing.

I wondered why she insisted that I be in her vicinity when she ate.

I joked with myself that it was a conspiracy to get me in the kitchen to prepare food instead of snacking. When I made enough headway in soup preparation so it didn’t make sense to stop, she’d finish eating.

Then, I remembered. I told her she had to eat foodies to live.

She wanted to show me she got the message, and this is her answer. She’s eating.

Communication comes in a variety of ways. Verbal language is only one form.

Here’s more of what I learned.

Micha’s not encumbered by limitations of human logic about what is or isn’t possible.

For over two years, in spite of numerous doctors saying her thyroid numbers were so high that there was no point to her staying alive, she decided to live.

She does what we are all capable of doing but often don’t.

She instinctively tunes in instead of overthinks.

I knew that people would send love and blessings if I asked.

I knew it would make a difference.

Your love strengthened her while she was making her choice to stay or go.

Your blessings helped her beat the odds beyond meds not working and the doctor’s death sentence.

Your energy boosted her spirit so she could more easily focus on healing her body.

Your TIP is to defy the odds.

  • Tune in to what’s true for you.
  • Believe in your dreams.
  • Trust in your innate sense of timing and instincts.
  • Don’t put all your trust in naysayers, even if they’re experts.
  • Pay attention to messages life is communicating.
  • Immerse yourself in a vortex of positive, supportive energy to energize whatever is important to you.

I consciously created a mastermind by asking for your support with Micha.

Thank you.

Allow your intentions to turn into results with grace and ease – surpassing your wildest imagination.

Defy the odds of what you think is possible.

For Micha, please keep your love and blessings coming.