Posts Tagged ‘Something wrong with me’

Stop Feeling There’s Something Wrong With You

November 8, 2021

Stop scaring yourself with the stories you tell about yourself.

“Regardless of how he presents himself he is your gremlin and his view of “what is so” is grounded in make-believe. Be aware of him. It is unnecessary to try to ignore him or to fight. Simply notice him.”

Richard D. Carson, Taming Your Gremlin, A Guide to Enjoying Yourself

I had mononucleosis in college and was out of school for a month. It took me a while to return to the rhythm of taking classes again. At the same time, my boyfriend came home from his college, and we enjoyed ourselves visiting with his family.
 
For me to make my 2 P.M. class, I had to leave his house at 1 P.M. At 1:15 I could have gone, but I would have been late. At 1:30 it was a lost cause and water over the dam… but not for me.
 
They listened to me try to decide “should I or shouldn’t I go” for a while. Then when it was too late to leave, they listened to me whine that I should have gone. Finally, his older brother said, “You made your decision. Stop beating yourself up over what you chose to do. There is nothing you can do about it now. Let it go.”


I didn’t realize I had a choice in my thinking. I thought the responsible thing to do was agonize over my decision so it would be known that I knew I should have gone but somehow couldn’t rise to the occasion… and there’s something wrong with me.


So much unnecessary confusion follows this type of thinking, because the “problem” isn’t happening outside of us.

The problem is caused from our perception and reaction to what occurs.

The downside is that a great deal of energy is spent spinning around something that doesn’t matter, and then comes another problem – frustration. It’s very difficult to get off a merry-go-round when it’s moving in circles.

When we go in circles we watch life pass us by and think about so many things we would like to do and have to do that we’re not doing…

Then we jump off one ride, not to land on solid ground of “what is,” but to go on another ride. We start beating ourselves up over what we didn’t do or perhaps what we feel we should’ve done.

There are additional carnival adventures such as getting angry, which is a variation of the frustration ride. Other forms of entertainment include blame, worry, fear, anxiety, and playing victim. Another favorite is inaction – spending a lot of time on the merry-go-round of the mind creates such dizziness that it’s impossible to think straight and be clear enough to do anything.

If you insist on thinking there’s something wrong with you, you’re off on a roller coaster ride.

You may choose to change some of your actions and the consequences they create, but there’s nothing wrong with you.

Does any of this sound familiar?

The effort used focusing on these rides instead could be redirected to what’s important to you.

The first step is to put an adult in your control booth, thank your inner kids for picking up the slack during your time out, and communicate confidence that qualified supervision is taking over.

If this sounds like schizophrenic behavior, that’s what happens when we allow child parts of ourselves to take over and rule our lives as if they are us. Our perceptions and reactions become those of a child in an adult body.

How can you make the shift?

You know. Inside of you, you know.

Think about how a mature adult talks and acts, and start talking to yourself that way.

The adult you is only found in the now, not the past or the future.

You can show yourself self-respect and appreciation. Speak to yourself the way you would like others to talk with you.

Few will treat you any better than you treat yourself.


A child part will not be shushed or ignored, or like a child, it simply will act out in another way. What it wants is what any child wants, even though it may be rebellious. It wants to know it is safe and loved.

You provide the internal terrain that is a safe haven by acting like an adult who is in control, and the child part can relax and leave you at peace.
 
One tool to accomplish this is to simply notice it, without reacting or judging or making yourself wrong.

Be the watcher, the observer. 

As your gain greater perspective, you may see that perhaps you could make different choices, but there’s nothing wrong with you.


Tired of that sickening feeling of feeling wrong?
Contact me to learn how at:
virginia@soulgoals.com

I work with people who choose to share
their gifts or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck or could 
use new tools or support.

I help them ignite their Soul’s goals
and be richly compensated doing what
they love.

Original Soulgoal Missive written in 2002 

Copyright © 2021 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

You’re a Winner!

August 18, 2020

Did you ever have any of these thoughts?

  • I’m not good enough.
  • If people knew what I feel behind my confident smiles or where I came from, they’d be surprised.
  • I’m afraid of failure and success.
  • I’m waiting for the other shoe to fall – yeah, it’s good now but it probably won’t last.
  • What if I make (another) mistake and lose it all?
  • There’s either not enough money or, when I have enough, I’m afraid it’s going to run out.
  • Maybe there’s something wrong with me.

I’ve lost count of how many people have told me stories like this. Here’s an example.

A woman was burdened with similar perspectives throughout her life. They played in the background of her thoughts like a persistent, low-grade fever.

Even though her business more than quadrupled in four months, she was afraid of not having enough time and that her success might be short-lived.

During her Belief Release session, she woke up to her personal power and let go of clouded thinking.

How? She replaced doubt, limit, fear, anxiety and lack through her power of choice, perspective, love and putting her Essence in charge.

She felt happy and freer than ever before.

Recognize that YOU’RE A WINNER RIGHT NOW!

  • Take one instance where you don’t feel good about your life or business, and change your perspective.
  • Reframe you and your situation from being a loser to a winner.
  • What did you learn?
  • How did you become stronger?
  • Choose to let go of the past.

Now, with you as the artist of your business and life, what do you choose? What does your ideal business or life look like?

When you clear out your inner cobwebs, you’re able to hear the inner whisperings of your Essence and receive guidance and direction for your next step and greater success.

Stop listening to others’ fears and limitations that they’ve projected on you that you may have believed were true. They’re not.

Recognize you were born a winner regardless of circumstances then or now… and YOU STILL ARE A WINNER!

This is a new moment.

Go forth and create something wonderful.

Reprinted from Soulgoals’ Archives, June 22, 2016

http://www.soulgoals.com

I work with people
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.
I help them be richly compensated
doing what they love by aligning with
their Soul’s goals.

Copyright © 2020 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.