Posts Tagged ‘feel stuck’

Feel Like There’s No Way Out? These 4 Pointers Can Guide You.

January 25, 2021

Once I had a dream where I was in a room with no windows or doors and seemingly no way out.  I searched the walls for a way to leave, but there wasn’t any.

Then I discovered that there was a stairway in the middle of the room that took me to a higher level, and that room was filled with lots of windows, doors and light.

Albert Einstein is paraphrased to have said:

“We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.”

Feeling stuck in a maze is an emotional response that can leave you feeling there’s no way out. Instead, you can find a way to untangle yourself from whatever has gotten you balled up and take productive action. Here are four pointers that can help:

1. You’re frustrated because you’re trying to control the outcome by expecting it (or people) to be or act the way you think it should. 

Alternative:  Relax and anticipate this or something better will occur. Stop trying to micromanage the world. This opens you to tune into new ideas and directions.

2. You’re beating yourself up with fear, worry, regrets or other limiting thoughts and emotions because of your situation. 

Alternative: Release judging you, others and your circumstances. Replace it with an empowering perspective that you’re learning, and all is in divine order and timing.

3. You’re focused on what’s not working. 

Alternative: Focus on what you choose and the good feeling mojo it creates. Good feeling mojo is what opens you to manifest more quickly and with grace and ease.

4. You’re pushing to make things happen. 

Alternative: Stop resisting (and exhausting yourself about) what is and allow things to be the way they are. You getting fussy about it won’t change it or help. Let go. Let God. Set new goals for what you choose. Then take action from this perspective.

When you shift your energy, you allow life to create miracles and successes beyond your wildest expectations, and the way out appears… even if it starts out with one step at a time.

If you’d like help finding a way out,
contact me for a free consultation at:
virginia@soulgoals.com

I work with people who choose to share
their gifts or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck or could 
use new tools or support.
I help them ignite their Soul’s goals
and be richly compensated doing what
they love.”

Edited excerpt from January 25, 2016 Soulgoals’ post.

Copyright © 2021 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

Well, What Did You Expect?

January 18, 2021
Has life got you tied up in a knot? There are ways to free yourself – like untangling or cutting loose a cat who’s balled up in yarn. 

By the way, just because the cat is stuck, there’s nothing wrong with it anymore than there’s anything wrong with you when you go through your challenges!

To help you unravel your stuckness and why it’s happening, here’s an excerpt from my program Soulgoals: A Step-by-Step Guide to Live Your Dreams… even if you failed before, lost hope, are afraid, stressed or confused.

A client who emailed a request to her mastermind team wrote, “I have calls out to people, but things seem stuck.” Her goal was well written and specific, including her filling appointments for three cities plus a meet and greet.

But I felt the fear under her request and called her. She told me she felt pressure because an out-of-state manager was flying in, and she didn’t have appointments scheduled.

We discussed anticipating the best and letting go of expectation. Part of this letting go was a preoccupation with numbers – the number of bookings. Instead, I recommended she focus on the quality of appointments vs. the quantity.

The next night she sent us a long email. “I woke up fresh and energetic, turned things over to my CEO (God)… I decided that I was not going to “push” to “make” anything happen.” [Her bold print]

Results? Before the end of that day, key people either returned her calls to book or called prospects on her behalf to fill the appointments for her! A big client contacted her to book four trainings. She hosted a successful event that afternoon plus found a perfect venue for a board member retreat following an unsuccessful month-long search.

If you hold onto how you expect life should be, what a person should do, or what’s supposed to fulfill you, you not only limit yourself but you block your success and create unnecessary pain and suffering.

It pulls you away from the present moment and foists you into an imagined future of potential disappointment, discouragement, frustration, sadness, anger, or helplessness.

Stop shoulding on yourself!

The beauty of the present moment is that it opens you to what’s in alignment with your soul. If one way doesn’t work, there’s a reason. Something better is available… if you allow it into your world.

Instead of longing for what mighta, woulda, coulda or shoulda been, notice the gift of accepting what is.

Anticipating the best instead of expecting specific outcomes makes you and your words more powerful and opens you to results designed for the highest and best interest for all.

It’s an important lesson, and I invite you to consider it in case it makes the difference between creating difficulties or catapulting you to greater success and abundance.

Well, what did you expect?

Excerpt from January 25, 2016 Soulgoals’ post.

If you’d like help to make your life easier,
contact me for a free consultation at:
virginia@soulgoals.com

I work with people who choose to 
share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way

but don’t know how, feel stuck or could 
use new tools or support.
I help them ignite their Soul’s goals
and be richly compensated doing what
they love.”
Copyright © 2021 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

How to Make Your Life Easier in 3 Seconds

January 11, 2021
Flow, flow, flow yourself, gently down the stream… of life.

Ever start your day with dread? You don’t know how you’re going to get things done. Worried about what your spouse, boss or kids are going to say or do. Wondering how you’re going to get more money. Feel stuck.

You may not mean it, but haphazard musings create intentions that cascade throughout your day. If you begin your morning with fear, anxiety or lack of direction, life will present you with a smorgasbord of experiences to match.

December was super busy for me. I launched my days thinking about my To Do list, random thoughts, what happened yesterday… just anything. The results were a crisis a week that miraculously got solved – but what a roller coaster ride.

I had taken a break from what I know works – quiet time to go within and to consciously set intentions. As the year rolled in, I realized it made sense to take three seconds to say:

I CHOOSE TO BE IN DIVINE FLOW.

I often add a few extra game changers in addition to Divine Flow such as choosing Divine: order, timing, financial abundance, grace and ease or whatever idea that inspires me.

A couple of weeks later, I noticed how everyday had been astounding. I was still busy and successful yet not overwhelmed – as long as I remembered to choose to be in Divine Flow. I also noticed that if I didn’t react but instead let situations play out, even things that appeared to be two sandwiches short of a lunch were fulfilling.

It’s mind boggling to think that something so simple can manifest such profound results.

Imagine going to a ticket counter at a train station. If you hop on any train you could land in an urban jungle. But Divine Flow is different. You’re allowing the life force to guide you, surrendering control to a Master Planner who has your best interest at heart.

If you question that life is supportive, consider these words from Einstein:

“I think the most important question facing humanity is, ’Is the universe a friendly place?’ This is the first and most basic question all people must answer for themselves.”

“If we decide that the universe is neither friendly nor unfriendly and that God is essentially ‘playing dice with the universe,’ then we are simply victims to the random toss of the dice and our lives have no real purpose or meaning.”

“God does not play dice with the universe.”


Your life isn’t random. You’re not a victim. You have the ability to consciously design your life with the Divine.

Discover this co-creation by running an experiment. Choose to be in Divine Flow daily for two weeks. Not just any flow – not your neighbor’s or that of people at work. Divine Flow. Affirm this with an attitude of faith not desperation. If you forget in the morning, do it later. I’ve now included it as a non-negotiable way to start my day, right up there with going to the bathroom.

Now it’s your turn to “row, row, row your boat gently down the stream.  Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily. Life is but a dream.”

It’s a dream you’re creating.

Reposted from January 14, 2013

Like support to create an easier life?
Contact me for a free consultation at:
virginia@soulgoals.com

I work with people to create
an easier life.

I help them ignite their Soul’s goals
and be richly compensated doing what
they love.

Copyright © 2021 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

How to Skate Through Life… even in hard times

October 26, 2020

The Skating Minister by Henry Raeburn

Wouldn’t you rather skate through life than be burdened by it?

My dream this morning gave me a roadmap how.

Let’s say you wanted to ice skate in winter, but there wasn’t a place to do it.
However, you had a place where water could be added to create a pond.

So, you filled that space with an available water source.

Gave it time to freeze.

Now you can skate.

Makes sense. But what does this have to do with anything?

Where’s your focus?

Worrying about problems is how we might believe we’re being responsible, but that’s looking in the wrong direction for answers. Although habits can be hard to break, you do have other choices.

You could:

  • whine about not being able to skate because there isn’t a place to do it.
  • blame wildlife for drinking the water that could’ve frozen.
  • feel sorry for yourself or tell your story so others can feel sorry for you.

However, you still can’t skate if you choose any of these.

You can’t have a problem without already having the answer.
But, if you keep looking at the problem and feeling bad about it, you won’t see the solution!

You have a place within, at the core of who you are, that already has the solution – the space for the pond.

If you’re open to receive, your inner guidance will fill you with answers.

To continue with this metaphor, if you allow answers time to transform from fluid to solid, thoughts and feelings can materialize into solutions.

Here’s where Mastermind Principle #3 from my Soulgoals program comes in handy:

I trust my Self and listen to the voice within.

What if you stay loyal to the what-if-it-doesn’t-work thinking?

Results: Frustration, anger, blame, struggle, complications and disappointment. Same ole, same ole. Your focus is on what doesn’t work, so you magnetize more of the same. Success goes up and down like a seesaw.

Sound familiar?

What else you can do? How can you skate through life?


First step:  Notice how you greet situations.

Is it with fear, doubt, discouragement or other negative feelings?

Instead, focus on any positive experiences you’ve ever had about this.

If you don’t have one, imagine how you’d like it to be. 

Here are examples:

  • Before a sales presentation or any potentially challenging situation, remember ones that went great. It doesn’t matter if you’ve put your foot in your mouth a hundred times before. But if once, your long lost uncle bought a candy bar you were selling in grade school, and you felt happy, go to those thoughts and good feelings.
  • Feeling weak in the knees because you’re about to talk with someone? Instead, recall moments of empowering interactions.
  • If you’re used to feeling the other shoe is going to drop, feeling good may seem downright unnatural.  However, with practice and positive results, you’ll feel more comfortable.

Forget what you may have heard about doubting yourself. That was misery wanting company.

Feeling good IS your natural state. Enjoy skating.

Reposted from October 27, 2015

If you’d like help to live
an ideal life you’ve imagined,
(yes, it’s possible),

contact me at:
virginia@soulgoals.com

I work with people who choose to share
their gifts or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck or could 
use new tools or support.
I help them ignite their Soul’s goals
and be richly compensated doing what
they love.

Escape the Quicksand of Fear

September 21, 2020

Fear was my #1 issue during a personal growth session in 1991. It took us two hours to reveal what the particular fear was until I realized it was everything!

It took me years to recognize the insidious ways fear had molded my life since childhood.

Like attracts like, so when the vibration of fear precedes actions, the results reflect that energy. More things to fear.

What follows is lack; struggle; failure; disappointment; frustration; worry; anxiety; loss of business; financial hardship; and that dreadful fear of the future – “what if” things don’t work out and I face a fate worse than death?

Especially when I felt the fear was justified, being afraid grew exponentially; it was like adding sugar to yeast. “Just look at my circumstances. Anyone in them would feel this way.”

Once when my budget was screaming “ouch,” I feared missing a credit card payment. I knew someone this happened to, and her rates skyrocketed. My negative musings caused me unconsciously to pay my bill from an account where I don’t keep money… and I missed my payment.

My preoccupation with my imagined, financial ruin also had me overlook paying my water bill. I opened the top portion of a letter sent to alert me and set it aside thinking it was next month’s bill. Only after coming home from burying my cat who suddenly died and discovering my water had been turned off did I see it was a disconnect notice.

I had the money, but I was so consumed with fearing future disasters that I created them!  As Job said, “For the thing which I greatly feared is come upon me, and that which I was afraid of is come unto me.”

You may have been pulled into the quicksand of fear. Once you start sliding down its slippery slope, every frantic breath has you descend into it more deeply.

All my successes occurred when I let go of fear.

What is quicksand, and how does it work?

Quicksand is just a soupy mix of water trapped in ordinary sand that can’t escape. It’s a liquefied soil that can’t support weight. It can occur almost anywhere if the right conditions are present.

Contrary to being the frightening, bottomless pit portrayed in the movies, it rarely is deeper than a few feet.

Stepping into quicksand will not swallow you whole or suck you under, but thrashing about will force you deeper into it. The more you struggle, the faster you sink.

Most people who drown in quicksand or in any liquid are those who panic and start flailing their arms and legs. However, it’s easier to break free of it than you may think.

To escape you have to stop fighting. The key is not to panic.

The way out is to relax and make slow movements back to the surface. Because your body is less dense than the quicksand, you will float to the surface if you let go of the struggle and relax. In fact, it’s easier to float on quicksand than on water. Once afloat, you can find your way back to safety.

Hmm, so similar to fear – how we drown in it and how we can escape its murky mud.

Let go of struggling and relax!

Originally posted on February 26, 2012

 

If you’d like help escaping the quicksand in your life,
contact me at virginia@soulgoals.com

I work with people who choose to share
their gifts or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck or could 
use new tools or support.

I help them ignite their Soul’s goals
and be richly compensated doing what
they love.”

Are You Jumping to the Right Conclusion?

August 24, 2020

 

After sitting through a couple of traffic lights behind a car that wouldn’t budge, my friend got very annoyed.

He thought, what’s wrong with these people along with several choice expletives.

Finally, he angrily swerved around to get in the lane next to them. In the car was a man and a child in the passenger seat.

As my friend turned to the driver to give him a piece of his mind, the man asked, “Which way to the hospital? I have to take my child to the hospital, and I don’t know if I need to turn right or left.”

With this new information and perspective, his annoyance instantly left. He became fully engaged in helping.

Recently, a woman explained how she was quite bothered by something I’d said. She felt upset for months, since we had our last conversation. When we finally talked again, she told me that she didn’t know how I could’ve said such a thing and made analogies all pointing to why she should be indignant.

She assumed the story she was telling herself was correct, and therefore she was justifiably angry with me.  

A couple of minutes into her explanation, when I realized she had totally misinterpreted the point I was making, I clarified what I had said. Very quickly, the story and irritation at me that she’d been holding onto for so long evaporated.

I suggested that, in the future, she talk with me if she had an issue rather than jump to conclusions.

If you find yourself upset about something and jumping to conclusions, take a step back and observe. Is this a one-time or ongoing occurrence? Might there be a different way of connecting the dots? There may be a different way of handling this.

Perhaps there’s a lesson for you to learn. Maybe there’s a different story you can tell about it and discover a new conclusion.

Are you using or misusing your imagination?

 

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy this post? Please share.

Reprinted from Soulgoals’ Archives, February 4, 2019

Ready to find clarity and discover
how you can jump to the conclusion
that you can get what you really want…
or something better?

Contact me for a complimentary
Do What You Love Break Free Session.

Email me at:

virginia@soulgoals.com

http://www.soulgoals.com

I work with people
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.

I help them be richly compensated
doing what they love by aligning
with their Soul’s goals.

Copyright © 2020 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

 

4 Ways to Get Unstuck… and how you create unnecessary pain and suffering

July 20, 2020

Feeling stalled out or stuck during Covid time? There are ways to free yourself – like untangling or cutting loose a cat who’s balled up in yarn. By the way, just because it’s stuck, there’s nothing wrong with the cat anymore than there’s anything wrong with you!

To help you unravel your stuckness, here’s an excerpt from my program Soulgoals: A Step-by-Step Guide to Live Your Dreams… even if you failed before, lost hope, are afraid, stressed or confused.

A client who emailed a request to her mastermind team wrote, “I have calls out to people, but things seem stuck.” Her goal was well written and specific, including her filling appointments for three cities and a meet and greet.

I felt the fear under her request and called her. She told me she felt pressure because an out-of-state manager was flying in, and she didn’t have appointments scheduled.

We discussed anticipating the best and letting go of expectation. Part of this letting go was a preoccupation with numbers – the number of bookings. Instead, I recommended she focus on the quality of appointments vs. the quantity.

The next night she sent us a long email. “I woke up fresh and energetic, turned things over to my CEO (God)… I decided that I was not going to “push” to “make” anything happen.” [Her bold print]

Results? Before the end of that day, key people either returned her calls to book or called prospects on her behalf to fill the appointments for her! A big client contacted her to book four trainings.

She hosted a successful event that afternoon plus found a perfect venue for a board member retreat following an unsuccessful month-long search.

If you hold onto how you expect life should be, what a person should do or act, or what’s supposed to fulfill you, you not only limit yourself but you block your success and create unnecessary pain and suffering.

Why? If things don’t turn out as you expected, you can get disappointed. However, if you set intentions but stop trying to control exactly how the outcomes should appear, you let go and let God.

Expectations can pull you away from the present moment and foist you into an imagined future of potential disappointment, discouragement, frustration, sadness, anger, or helplessness.

The beauty of the present moment is that it opens you to what’s in alignment with your soul. If one way doesn’t work, there’s a reason. Something better is available… if you allow it into your world.

Instead of longing for what mighta, woulda, coulda or shoulda been, notice the gift of accepting what is. By not resisting, you open yourself energetically to infinite possibilities.

Anticipating the best instead of expecting specific outcomes makes your words more powerful and opens you to results designed for the highest and best interest for all. It’s an important lesson, and I invite you to consider it in case it’s making the difference between creating difficulties or catapulting you to greater success and abundance.

4 Ways to Get Unstuck

It’s important to identify where you feel stuck. Feeling stuck is an emotional response that can leave you feeling there’s no way out. Here are four alternatives that can help:

  1. You’re frustrated because you’re trying to control the outcome by expecting it (or people) to be the way you think it should. Alternative: Relax and anticipate this or something better will occur. Stop trying to micromanage the world. This opens you to tune into new ideas and directions.
  2. You’re beating yourself up with regrets or other limiting thoughts and emotions because of your situation. Alternative: Release judging you, others and your circumstances. Replace it with an empowering perspective that you’re learning, so is everyone else, and all is in divine order and timing.
  3. You’re focusing on how things aren’t working. Alternative: focus on what you choose and the good feeling mojo it creates. Good feeling mojo is what opens you to manifest more quickly and with grace and ease.
  4. You’re pushing to make things happen. Alternative: Stop resisting (and exhausting yourself about) what is and allow things to be the way they are. You getting fussy about it won’t change it or help. Let go. Let God. Set new goals for what you choose. Take action from this perspective.

Feeling stuck may be a clue that it’s time to change direction or attitude. You might have to let go of what you’re holding onto to make way for something even better! 

When you shift your energy, you allow life to create miracles and successes beyond your wildest expectations.

Reposted from Soulgoals’ Archives January 25, 2016

Know someone who might
benefit from reading this? Please share.

I work with people
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.
I help them ignite their Soul’s goals
and be richly compensated doing what
they love.

http://www.soulgoals.com

 

Copyright © 2020 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

Need Answers? Here’s How to Get Them.

June 9, 2020

During this time of challenges and changes, we can start to question. What’s happening to my life and the world? Am I on the right track? So many choices… what should I do?  Is there something for me to contribute, especially amidst such universal unrest? Is there a higher perspective to make sense of it all?

There are as many answers and opinions as there are people.

A key to life, though, is being able to listen to your Self – not your outer swirl of emotions or trying to fit into to others’ ideas about how you should live your life.

There is a way to be empowered by finding your own answers. The more you practice listening to your Self, the better you’re able to hear with clarity.

Here’s a repost from a Soulgoals’ Archive, April 29, 2011, that may help.

 

When something went wrong, my old response was to gasp and think: “Oh no. What am I going to do? I don’t know what to do.” I’d repeat it again and again – but I didn’t even realize I was saying it.

Next came the sickish anxiety in my gut. Fear clutched me like tentacles from a sci-fi film. Solutions had no way to penetrate that thick gunk of worry.

One afternoon, I discovered that I went over a credit card limit that day. All I could think about were the fees, marks on my credit report and a higher interest rate.

I noticed a broken record playing in my head. What was it? “What am I going to do? I don’t know what to do.”

Funny how that mantra sounded like my mother!

When I heard it, I changed my tune.

I said to myself, “There’s a part of me that doesn’t have a clue about what to do. There’s another part that knows. I ask my wise self to pop in an answer.”

I Got What I Asked For

After my request, I relaxed, let the situation go, and left for an appointment. As I walked to my car after my meeting, an idea popped in my head. Drive straight to the bank and pay the overage before the end of the business day.

When I did and the bank heard my concern, they also extended my credit limit. Problem solved; benefits gained.

Learning to relax and trust that all will be taken care of, no matter what, helps to wash away the goo of confusion. After all, if God takes care of the flowers and birds, surely you and I rate, too. But what about getting answers?

A theme found in several Biblical references offers age old wisdom.

Ask, and it shall be given to you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.

Put These Together:  Don’t Worry.  Ask for Help.

Now, when I need answers, I place a simple request: POP IT IN.

For example, I’m writing and get stuck. What I used to do was:

  • Whine: You know the mantra I used.
  • Worry: “What if I don’t get an answer?”
  • Get angry and complain: “I don’t have time for this.”
  • Feel like a helpless victim: “Why is this happening to me?”

Now, I ask inwardly for help: “I need a headline. POP IT IN.”

The answer comes – either immediately or after it incubates for a while.

Prayers are always answered in divine right timing, Therefore, I let the concern go and do something else. This takes care of the seeking and knocking.

Taking action refocuses me. It helps me to detach from fixating on results and when they should arrive.

Easy. Simple. Clear.

Only Supportive Ideas Are Welcome.

By the way, if an unsupportive idea pops in your head, pop it out. It’s your head, so claim dominion of it. Don’t give your power away to negative thinking. You have the power to pop in or out what goes in it.

When those supportive ideas pop in, even if they’re a little outside-the-box, act on them. This is a key.

Remember, everything is given according to your belief. If you allow the possibility, this really works.

I invite you to experiment. Need answers? Relax and ask inwardly to “POP IT IN!”

 

 

Virginia Goszewska, the founder of Soulgoals, believes each person and business has a way to contribute to life. The coaching systems she developed that help people find clarity, take action and experience personal and professional success are based on decades of research and experience. As a regional manager with a worldwide, top ten, Inc. 500 company and at top-level executive positions of international corporations, Virginia received awards in sales, training, management and business development. From Southeast Asia to the United Kingdom, people around the world have benefited from her expert coaching, compassionate insights and common sense.

http://www.soulgoals.com

Virginia offers complimentary Break-Free sessions by phone, holds workshops, seminars, team building programs and is a keynote speaker. She can be contacted at virginia@soulgoals.com  or (512) 842-1231.

Please feel free to forward this to friends and associates in its entirety.

Copyright © 2020 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

Short Story: Frustration with a Happy Ending

February 17, 2020

A client manifested nearly doubling the size of her facility for a great price while attracting countless miracles in the process – including her competition wanting to reserve a room there for a weekly group. This could translate to more customers learning about her and expanding her current business.

However, there were so many demands for her new space that opportunity turned to frustration as scheduling became a distressing challenge… until she had a change of heart.

She emailed this to me so I can share it with you.

“I’ve been seriously stressing over how to work this other group into the schedule without upsetting people who currently are taking my classes during those times.

“Of course, I was hearing many opinions on changing to different times and was trying to figure out a way to keep everyone happy – including the other group.

“I realized at some point early Tuesday (somewhere around 3 or 4 AM) that it would work out the way it was meant to, and let it go.

“With or without the other group, my business has a great schedule and a lot to offer.

“By Tuesday afternoon, we easily figured out the schedule with the other group, and it looks great!

I listened to my gut and let it go.

At 8 AM on Friday, she gave me an update that had just occurred within the previous half hour.

“Here’s another miracle.”

She had renovations scheduled so she could open her doors in three days – with the exception of painting. Again, she let it go thinking it could happen after the opening, even though it would require taking down a big wall of mirrors that she was about to have installed.

Until, that is, she casually mentioned her situation to a client who told her, “I can paint it this afternoon!!”

You don’t have to figure things out in advance for them to work out.
When you let go, you open to miracles. 

Reprinted from Soulgoals’ Archives posted on October 29, 2010

Ready to let go to have something even better?

If so, contact me for a complimentary
Do What You Love Break-Free Session at
virginia@soulgoals.com

I work with people
who choose to enjoy their lives,
share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.

I help them be richly compensated
by aligning
with their Soul’s goals.

Copyright © 2020 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

 

Escaping the Quicksand of Fear

January 20, 2020

Fear was my #1 issue during a personal growth session in 1991. It took us two hours to reveal what the particular fear was: everything! It took me years to recognize the insidious ways fear had molded my life since childhood.

Like attracts like. When the vibration of fear precedes actions, the results reflect that energy. What follows is lack; struggle; failure; disappointment; frustration; worry; anxiety; loss of business; financial hardship; and that dreadful fear of the future – “what if” things don’t work out and I face a fate worse than death?

Especially when I felt justified, being afraid was like adding sugar to yeast – “Just look at my circumstances. Anyone in them would feel this way.” Fear multiplied which attracted more things to be afraid about.

Once when my budget was screaming “ouch,” I feared missing a credit card payment. I knew someone this happened to, and her rates skyrocketed. My negative musings caused me unconsciously to pay my bill from an account where I don’t keep money… and I missed my payment.

My preoccupation with my imagined, financial ruin also had me overlook paying my water bill. I opened the top portion of a letter sent to alert me and set it aside thinking it was next month’s bill. Only minutes after coming home from burying my cat who suddenly died and discovering my water had been turned off did I see it was a disconnect notice.

I had the money, but I was so consumed with fearing future disasters that I created them!  As Job said, “For the thing which I greatly feared is come upon me, and that which I was afraid of is come unto me.”

You may have been pulled into the quicksand of fear. Once you start sliding  down its slippery slope, every frantic breath has you descend into it more deeply.

All my successes occurred when I let go of fear.

What is quicksand, and how does it work?

Quicksand is just a soupy mix of water trapped in ordinary sand that can’t escape, a liquefied soil that can’t support weight. It can occur almost anywhere if the right conditions are present. Contrary to being the frightening, bottomless pit portrayed in the movies, it rarely is deeper than a few feet.

Stepping into quicksand will not swallow you whole or suck you under, but thrashing about will force you deeper into it. The more you struggle, the faster you sink.

Most people who drown in quicksand or in any liquid are those who panic and start flailing their arms and legs. However, it’s easier to break free of it than you may think.

To escape you have to stop fighting. The key is not to panic.

The way out is to relax and make slow movements back to the surface.

Because your body is less dense than the quicksand, your body will float to the surface if you let go of the struggle and relax. In fact, it’s easier to float on quicksand than on water. Once afloat, you can find your way back to safety.

Hmm, so similar to fear – how we drown in it and how we can escape its murky mud.

Reprinted from Soulgoals’ Archive  posted on February 26, 2012

Tired of fighting your fears? If so, contact me for a Break-Free Session at virginia@soulgoals.com

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