Angry? Frustrated? You’re Not Alone.

Here’s an excerpt of an email I sent a client who’s been experiencing challenges. Recently, I’ve observed people transitioning from the way their life has been to something new and different. That can bring up a variety of feelings, some pleasant and others not so much.   I remember thinking in the early 1990s that my entire life was about frustration. There wasn’t any part of it that worked, from health, finances and career to my marriage. All were falling apart. This perfect storm became the springboard that has shaped the rest of my life of personal discovery and helping people like you.     Change is in the air, welcoming it, liking it, wanting it or not.   For some, it’s an exciting adventure.   For others, a dark cloud hangs overhead.   You, like the rest of us, have had a lifetime of listening to the false guidance of your ego, that façade of an identity. For you, it includes difficult emotions like anger and frustration. These emotions are like software glitches.   Here’s what Wikipedia says about glitches… computer glitches are incorrectly written software, incorrect instructions given by the operator, undetected invalid data, undetected communications errors…   You are not your software.   In contrast, your Essence is prompting you to listen within. This is the part of you that knows “all is well.” Abraham-Hicks said: “Your emotions are your indicator of how your active thought blends, or doesn’t blend, with the thought Source is thinking about the same subject in the same moment.” The inner turmoil you’re experiencing is the conflict between your ego’s perspective and that of the Source within you. Naturally, your ego is taking an all out stand for you to listen to its lies, lies that lead you to feel frustrated, angry and needing to sort things out. To protect itself, it uses a type of logic in which it’s already trained you, indoctrinated into you, so you believe that it’s telling you the truth. It presents its case that leaves you feeling anger and frustration. The logic only works if you see things from its limited and fearful point of view. Habitual thinking creates entrenched neural pathways in the brain. These become your default, your easy “go to” ways you react. These reactions, instead of responses, don’t always serve you. Just because ideas are in your head does NOT make them true! However, you can most assuredly access your true Essence instead, as it is YOU! A key is to differentiate between the whispers of your ego and your Essence. The ego certainly doesn’t want you to be around positive people that shed light on how it manipulates you. This way it has you, back where you can be controlled by the stress and chaos of unsupportive emotions. In defense of the ego, it thinks it’s protecting you. But these patterns were created from a child’s approach to survival. When presented with adult situations, the peace of your Essence offers greater insight and direction. Ask your Essence to step forward to be heard, and choose to listen to its guidance. If you’d like help for  your life to be easier while getting results YOU want, contact me for a complimentary Do What You Love Break Free Session. Email me at: virginia@soulgoals.com I work with people who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support. I help them be richly compensated doing what they love by discovering their Soul’s goals. Previously posted in Soulgoals’ Blog July 2019  Copyright © 2021 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

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About Those CRAZY Makers in Your Life

What do you see?  A young woman or an old one? 
This optical illusion was created over 100 years ago.

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Many problems in our world are because people see illusions of what they want to see and believe them to be true.

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Have you noticed people crazy making and buttons getting pushed? Some respond with anger, frustration or depression. Others find that finger pointing, denial and avoidance are easier than talking things through.

 Opportunities abound to deal with issues, but some prefer to ignore the elephant in the room. It would take more than new glasses to correct that vision.

 Changing perspective helps: step back emotionally and observe in a detached way. This reminds you not to take things personally. But what should you do about it?

---

 Ask yourself: Is there something to get out of it, something to learn?
Or is the point to get out of it and leave?

---

What’s the best action to take? This depends on the circumstances. But driving yourself bonkers and making yourself wrong only leads to a dead-end street.

 A lovely woman sent me a very ugly email. She wrote about demonic forces and people we once knew. She couldn’t be friends with me anymore because she wrote that I was still associated with them, even though I hadn’t been for years.

Weeks later she apologized. Because of past injustices inflicted on her by this group, her deep pain was triggered. She obviously wasn’t herself when she wrote it.

The point? I got out of it lessons of compassion; forgiveness; grace; and not judging as people make mistakes.

 The action? Let go of the past and move on. We renewed our friendship.

 A few months later, she sent another email explaining how she couldn’t be my friend because of my involvement with these same people.  

The point? Get out of it. When people are perpetually crazy making, create too much drama and repeat patterns that they’re not shifting, it’s often best to step back.

 The action? Don’t respond. Bless the situation and relationship and let them go.

PLEASE NOTE: There are people who have mental and emotional considerations and are well-served by our support to receive help! I’m referring to those whose default patterns are often unconscious, repetitive, self-centered and create chaos. It’s part of our journey to learn the difference and set boundaries when appropriate.

The following ideas may help you with the crazy makers in your life. Oh well, I can honestly say I’ve learned each one by doing the opposite.

1. Breathe deeply in a relaxed way. Relax your body.
2. Step back emotionally and observe rather than become enmeshed with the story.
3. Listen to what’s being expressed and understand their perspective.
4. Let go of a need to be heard, be validated or express your viewpoint.
5. Ask yourself, even if you believe they’re wrong: Why is it essential that others should think and act the way you think they should? Do you need their approval? Are you wanting control? Are you letting them make you feel unsafe or insecure? Are you judging them? Do you need to be right?
6. Everyone has a right to their viewpoint. If you don’t like it, you don’t have to stick around, at least emotionally and mentally if you can’t leave physically.
7. Tune in to your gut – what do you feel is true, which usually isn’t your story about it, and the best action to take? You know the answer if you have the willingness and courage to be quiet within and see it.

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 “Forgive them for they know not what they do.”

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 Using these tips will:

• Bring you peace of mind
• Awaken you to greater wisdom, awareness and empowerment
• Honor others even if you’re sure they’ve lost their mind
• Reclaim your time and energy to enjoy life and pursue your goals
• Bring you better results in the long run.

Avoidance and resistance to honestly look at a situation are futile.

Tap into your inner mastership. Don’t be afraid to step back, observe, SEE, then act, lest you start crazy making yourself.

 If you don’t like what you see, envision something better. Focus on your new choice without the emotional drama.

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Warning: using these tips will not give you the emotional exhilaration received from feeling right; trying to fix or rescue people; feeling victimized; having your ego stroked; expressing anger; trying to control; or the comfort of familiarity from reliving your sad story. 

 None of these provide long-lasting satisfaction anyway. 

 Using these tips will:

• Bring you peace of mind
• Awaken you to greater wisdom, awareness and empowerment
• Honor others even if you’re sure they’ve lost their mind
• Reclaim your time and energy to enjoy life and pursue your goals
• Bring you better results in the long run.

Avoidance and resistance to look honestly at a situation are futile.

Tap into your inner mastership. Don’t be afraid to step back, observe, SEE, then act, lest you start crazy making yourself.

 If you don’t like what you see, envision something better. Focus on your new choice without the emotional drama.

---

Many problems in our world are because people see illusions of what they want to see and believe them to be true.

---

If you’d like help with any crazy making in your life,
contact me for a free consultation at:
virginia@soulgoals.com

I work with people who choose to share
their gifts or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck or could 
use new tools or support.

I help them ignite their Soul’s goals
and be richly compensated doing what
they love.”

Edited from Soulgoals’ published on March 25, 2011, When Buttons Are Pushed

Copyright © 2021 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

Are You Jumping to the Right Conclusion?

Are your conclusions a stretch of your imagination?

After sitting through a couple of traffic lights behind a car that wouldn’t budge, my friend got very annoyed.

He thought, what’s wrong with these people along with several choice expletives.

Finally, he angrily swerved around to get in the lane next to them. In the car was a man and a child in the passenger seat.

As my friend turned to the driver to give him a piece of his mind, the man asked, “Which way to the hospital? I have to take my child to the hospital, and I don’t know if I need to turn right or left.”

With this new information and perspective, his annoyance instantly left. He became fully engaged in helping.

Recently, a woman explained how she was quite bothered by something I’d said. She didn’t respond to my calls and felt upset for months, ever since we had our last conversation. When we finally talked again, she told me that she didn’t know how I could’ve said such a thing and made analogies all pointing to why she should be indignant.

She assumed the story she was telling herself was correct, and therefore she was justifiably angry with me.  

A couple of minutes into her explanation, when I realized she had totally misinterpreted the point I was making, I clarified what I was saying. Very quickly, the story and irritation at me that she’d been holding onto for so long evaporated.

I suggested that, in the future, she talk with me if she had an issue rather than jump to conclusions.

If you find yourself upset about something and jumping to conclusions, take a step back and observe. Is this a one-time or ongoing occurrence? Might there be a different way of connecting the dots? There may be a different way of handling this.

Perhaps there’s a lesson for you to learn. Maybe there’s a different story you can tell about it and discover a new conclusion.

What conclusions are you jumping to? Are you using or misusing your imagination?

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy this post? Please share.

Ready to find clarity and discover
how you can jump to the conclusion
so you get what you really want…
or something better?
Contact me for a complimentary
Do What You Love Break Free Session.

Email me at:

virginia@soulgoals.com

I work with people
who choose to create a more
fulfilling life or business
in a bigger way,
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.

I help them be richly compensated
doing what they love by aligning
with their Soul’s goals.


Reposted from Soulgoal’s Blog, February 4, 2019

Copyright © 2021 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

Well, What Did You Expect?

Has life got you tied up in a knot? There are ways to free yourself – like untangling or cutting loose a cat who’s balled up in yarn.  By the way, just because the cat is stuck, there’s nothing wrong with it anymore than there’s anything wrong with you when you go through your challenges! To help you unravel your stuckness and why it’s happening, here’s an excerpt from my program Soulgoals: A Step-by-Step Guide to Live Your Dreams… even if you failed before, lost hope, are afraid, stressed or confused. A client who emailed a request to her mastermind team wrote, “I have calls out to people, but things seem stuck.” Her goal was well written and specific, including her filling appointments for three cities plus a meet and greet. But I felt the fear under her request and called her. She told me she felt pressure because an out-of-state manager was flying in, and she didn’t have appointments scheduled. We discussed anticipating the best and letting go of expectation. Part of this letting go was a preoccupation with numbers – the number of bookings. Instead, I recommended she focus on the quality of appointments vs. the quantity. The next night she sent us a long email. “I woke up fresh and energetic, turned things over to my CEO (God)… I decided that I was not going to “push” to “make” anything happen.” [Her bold print] Results? Before the end of that day, key people either returned her calls to book or called prospects on her behalf to fill the appointments for her! A big client contacted her to book four trainings. She hosted a successful event that afternoon plus found a perfect venue for a board member retreat following an unsuccessful month-long search. If you hold onto how you expect life should be, what a person should do, or what’s supposed to fulfill you, you not only limit yourself but you block your success and create unnecessary pain and suffering. It pulls you away from the present moment and foists you into an imagined future of potential disappointment, discouragement, frustration, sadness, anger, or helplessness. Stop shoulding on yourself! The beauty of the present moment is that it opens you to what’s in alignment with your soul. If one way doesn’t work, there’s a reason. Something better is available… if you allow it into your world. Instead of longing for what mighta, woulda, coulda or shoulda been, notice the gift of accepting what is. Anticipating the best instead of expecting specific outcomes makes you and your words more powerful and opens you to results designed for the highest and best interest for all. It’s an important lesson, and I invite you to consider it in case it makes the difference between creating difficulties or catapulting you to greater success and abundance. Well, what did you expect? Excerpt from January 25, 2016 Soulgoals’ post. If you’d like help to make your life easier, contact me for a free consultation at: virginia@soulgoals.com I work with people who choose to  share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or could  use new tools or support. I help them ignite their Soul’s goals and be richly compensated doing what they love.”

Copyright © 2021 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

Need Answers? Here’s How to Get Them.

During this time of challenges and changes, we can start to question. What’s happening to my life and the world? Am I on the right track? So many choices… what should I do?  Is there something for me to contribute, especially amidst such universal unrest? Is there a higher perspective to make sense of it all?

There are as many answers and opinions as there are people.

A key to life, though, is being able to listen to your Self – not your outer swirl of emotions or trying to fit into to others’ ideas about how you should live your life.

There is a way to be empowered by finding your own answers. The more you practice listening to your Self, the better you’re able to hear with clarity.

Here’s a repost from a Soulgoals’ Archive, April 29, 2011, that may help.

 

When something went wrong, my old response was to gasp and think: “Oh no. What am I going to do? I don’t know what to do.” I’d repeat it again and again – but I didn’t even realize I was saying it.

Next came the sickish anxiety in my gut. Fear clutched me like tentacles from a sci-fi film. Solutions had no way to penetrate that thick gunk of worry.

One afternoon, I discovered that I went over a credit card limit that day. All I could think about were the fees, marks on my credit report and a higher interest rate.

I noticed a broken record playing in my head. What was it? “What am I going to do? I don’t know what to do.”

Funny how that mantra sounded like my mother!

When I heard it, I changed my tune.

I said to myself, “There’s a part of me that doesn’t have a clue about what to do. There’s another part that knows. I ask my wise self to pop in an answer.”

I Got What I Asked For

After my request, I relaxed, let the situation go, and left for an appointment. As I walked to my car after my meeting, an idea popped in my head. Drive straight to the bank and pay the overage before the end of the business day.

When I did and the bank heard my concern, they also extended my credit limit. Problem solved; benefits gained.

Learning to relax and trust that all will be taken care of, no matter what, helps to wash away the goo of confusion. After all, if God takes care of the flowers and birds, surely you and I rate, too. But what about getting answers?

A theme found in several Biblical references offers age old wisdom.

Ask, and it shall be given to you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.

Put These Together:  Don’t Worry.  Ask for Help.

Now, when I need answers, I place a simple request: POP IT IN.

For example, I’m writing and get stuck. What I used to do was:

• Whine: You know the mantra I used.
• Worry: “What if I don’t get an answer?”
• Get angry and complain: “I don’t have time for this.”
• Feel like a helpless victim: “Why is this happening to me?”

Now, I ask inwardly for help: “I need a headline. POP IT IN.”

The answer comes – either immediately or after it incubates for a while.

Prayers are always answered in divine right timing, Therefore, I let the concern go and do something else. This takes care of the seeking and knocking.

Taking action refocuses me. It helps me to detach from fixating on results and when they should arrive.

Easy. Simple. Clear.

Only Supportive Ideas Are Welcome.

By the way, if an unsupportive idea pops in your head, pop it out. It’s your head, so claim dominion of it. Don’t give your power away to negative thinking. You have the power to pop in or out what goes in it.

When those supportive ideas pop in, even if they’re a little outside-the-box, act on them. This is a key.

Remember, everything is given according to your belief. If you allow the possibility, this really works.

I invite you to experiment. Need answers? Relax and ask inwardly to “POP IT IN!”

 

 

Virginia Goszewska, the founder of Soulgoals, believes each person and business has a way to contribute to life. The coaching systems she developed that help people find clarity, take action and experience personal and professional success are based on decades of research and experience. As a regional manager with a worldwide, top ten, Inc. 500 company and at top-level executive positions of international corporations, Virginia received awards in sales, training, management and business development. From Southeast Asia to the United Kingdom, people around the world have benefited from her expert coaching, compassionate insights and common sense.

http://www.soulgoals.com

Virginia offers complimentary Break-Free sessions by phone, holds workshops, seminars, team building programs and is a keynote speaker. She can be contacted at virginia@soulgoals.com  or (512) 842-1231.

Please feel free to forward this to friends and associates in its entirety.

Copyright © 2020 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

Short Stories about Kindness, Anger and Frank Sinatra

How would you feel if this were you?

 A friend waited behind a car as it sat through not one but TWO green lights. Well, he had several choice words for that man.

 Angrily he drove his car next to the driver and a little girl who sat next to him. The man turned to my friend and said, “I have to take my daughter to the hospital, but I don’t know which way to turn. Can you help me?”
 

 His anger and judgment vaporized with this new perspective.
 

---

 
While waiting at a counter in a small shop, the woman next to me wanted to reclaim a lay-away that had been there for several months. The clerk very politely explained that their policy was for 30 days, she didn’t have a record of it, and the owner wasn’t present.

The customer responded by heartlessly debasing the clerk for being rude, which she wasn’t being at all.

After she left, the clerk told me that the customer had no idea of the challenges in her life and how much courage it took for her just to come to work.
 

 If the customer looked beyond her self-interests, she may have handled things differently.
 

---

Then there’s this story of kindness with Frank Sinatra.

 At a party hosted by Frank Sinatra at his ex-wife’s home, a young woman accidentally knocked over one of a pair of alabaster birds and smashed it. His daughter Nancy began to say how they were one of her mother’s favorites, but Frank stopped her with a look. As 40 guests stared in stunned silence, he quickly walked over to the other bird. He flicked it with a finger to the floor and smashed it, too.  Then he kindly put his around the woman and told her in a way to diffuse the situation and her discomfort, “That’s okay, kid.”
 

 Ahhh, grace in action.
 

---

 
From individuals to world politics, I’ve heard many stories this week of missed opportunities for consideration, kindness or communication.
 

An acting manager complicated instead of resolved a situation while treating a customer like a low-life.
A delay in a project with no urgent deadline elicited unnecessary rebuke.
People locked into negative viewpoints while refusing dialogue.
 

 The ego wears many masks including: righteous indignation; superiority posing as the high road; impatience; sticking it to people; projecting one’s issues onto others; belittling; and judgment.

 How do you respond when things don’t go your way and your buttons are pushed?

 Everyone has bad days and maybe you could’ve done some things differently. But there are times you’ve chosen grace and kindness. You’ve listened; considered other viewpoints before jumping to conclusions; welcomed communication; and allowed people to be themselves although different from you.

 The most important person to be kind and non-judgmental to is you. You can’t give away what you don’t have.

 How does this affect your goals?  

 When you’re hard on yourself and others, you may repel what you want most or find it slipping through your fingers once you get it.

 What can you do about it right now? Just change your perspective – consider another way of looking at things.

 Ask yourself, “What did I learn?”

Fast forward to the present moment as you leave the past behind. Benefit from your lessons and move on to your next adventure. One option is to do it without judgment, with grace.

Reprinted from Soulgoals Blog Archives February 28, 2011

Tired of being hard on yourself?

Ready for something way better?
If so, contact me for a complimentary
Do What You Love Break-Free Session at
virginia@soulgoals.com
 

I work with people
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.

I help them be richly compensated
doing what they love by tuning in to
their Soul’s goals.

Copyright © 2020 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

Angry? Frustrated? Here’s What I Wrote to my Client.

Here’s an excerpt of an email I sent a client who’s been experiencing challenges. Recently, I’ve observed people transitioning from the way their life has been to something new and different. That can bring up a variety of feelings, some pleasant and others not so much.   I remember thinking in the early 1990s that my entire life was about frustration. There wasn’t any part of it that worked, from health, finances and career to my marriage. All were falling apart. This perfect storm became the springboard that has shaped the rest of my life of personal discovery and helping people like you.     Change is in the air, welcoming it, liking it, wanting it or not.   For some, it’s an exciting adventure.   For others, a dark cloud hangs overhead.   You, like the rest of us, have had a lifetime of listening to the false guidance of your ego, that façade of an identity. For you, it includes difficult emotions like anger and frustration. These emotions are like software glitches.   Here’s what Wikipedia says about glitches… computer glitches are incorrectly written software, incorrect instructions given by the operator, undetected invalid data, undetected communications errors…   You are not your software.   In contrast, your Essence is prompting you to listen within. This is the part of you that knows “all is well.” Abraham-Hicks said: “Your emotions are your indicator of how your active thought blends, or doesn’t blend, with the thought Source is thinking about the same subject in the same moment.” The inner turmoil you’re experiencing is the conflict between your ego’s perspective and that of the Source within you. Naturally, your ego is taking an all out stand for you to listen to its lies, lies that lead you to feel frustrated, angry and needing to sort things out. To protect itself, it uses a type of logic in which it’s already trained you, indoctrinated into you, so you believe that it’s telling you the truth. It presents its case that leaves you feeling anger and frustration. The logic only works if you see things from its limited and fearful point of view. Habitual thinking creates entrenched neural pathways in the brain. These become your default, your easy “go to” ways you react. These reactions, instead of responses, don’t always serve you. Just because ideas are in your head does NOT make them true! However, you can most assuredly access your true Essence instead, as it is YOU! A key is to differentiate between the whispers of your ego and your Essence. The ego certainly doesn’t want you to be around positive people that shed light on how it manipulates you. This way it has you, back where you can be controlled by the stress and chaos of unsupportive emotions. In defense of the ego, it thinks its protecting you. But these patterns were created from a child’s approach to survival. When presented with adult situations, the peace of your Essence offers greater insight and direction. Ask your Essence to step forward to be heard, and choose to listen to its guidance. If you’d like help for  your life to be easier while getting results, contact me for a complimentary Do What You Love Break Free Session. Email me at: virginia@soulgoals.com I work with people who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support. I help them be richly compensated doing what they love by discovering their Soul’s goals.   Copyright © 2019 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

Are You Jumping to the Right Conclusion?

Are your conclusions a stretch of your imagination?

 

After sitting through a couple of traffic lights behind a car that wouldn’t budge, my friend got very annoyed.

He thought, what’s wrong with these people along with several choice expletives.

Finally, he angrily swerved around to get in the lane next to them. In the car was a man and a child in the passenger seat.

As my friend turned to the driver to give him a piece of his mind, the man asked, “Which way to the hospital? I have to take my child to the hospital, and I don’t know if I need to turn right or left.”

With this new information and perspective, his annoyance instantly left. He became fully engaged in helping.

Recently, a woman explained how she was quite bothered by something I’d said. She felt upset for months, since we had our last conversation. When we finally talked again, she told me that she didn’t know how I could’ve said such a thing and made analogies all pointing to why she should be indignant.

She assumed the story she was telling herself was correct, and therefore she was justifiably angry with me.  

A couple of minutes into her explanation, when I realized she had totally misinterpreted the point I was making, I clarified what I was saying. Very quickly, the story and irritation at me that she’d been holding onto for so long evaporated.

I suggested that, in the future, she talk with me if she had an issue rather than jump to conclusions.

If you find yourself upset about something and jumping to conclusions, take a step back and observe. Is this a one-time or ongoing occurrence? Might there be a different way of connecting the dots? There may be a different way of handling this.

Perhaps there’s a lesson for you to learn. Maybe there’s a different story you can tell about it and discover a new conclusion.

Are you using or misusing your imagination?

With gratitude,

Virginia

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy this post? Please share.

Ready to find clarity and discover
how you can jump to the conclusion
that you can get what you really want…
or something better?
Contact me for a complimentary
Do What You Love Break Free Session.

Email me at:

virginia@soulgoals.com

I work with people, at any age,
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.

I help them be richly compensated
doing what they love by aligning
with their Soul’s goals.
Copyright © 2019 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

NEED ANSWERS? POP IT IN!

 When something went wrong, my old response was to gasp and think: “Oh no. What am I going to do? I don’t know what to do.” I’d repeat it again and again – but I didn’t even realize I was saying it.

 Next came the sickish anxiety in my gut. Fear clutched me like tentacles from a sci-fi film. Solutions had no way to penetrate that thick gunk of worry.

 One afternoon, I discovered that I went over a credit card limit that day. All I could think about were the fees, marks on my credit report and a higher interest rate.

 I noticed a broken record playing in my head. What was it? “What am I going to do? I don’t know what to do.”

 Funny how that mantra sounded like my mother!

 When I heard it, I changed my tune.

 I said to myself, “There’s a part of me that doesn’t have a clue about what to do. There’s another part that knows. I ask my wise self to pop in an answer.”

I Got What I Asked For

 After my request, I relaxed, let the situation go, and left for an appointment. As I walked to my car after my meeting, an idea popped in my head. Drive straight to the bank and pay the overage before the end of the business day.

 When I did and the bank heard my concern, they also extended my credit limit. Problem solved; benefits gained.

 Learning to relax and trust that all will be taken care of, no matter what, helps to wash away the goo of confusion. After all, if God takes care of the flowers and birds, surely you and I rate, too. But what about getting answers?

 A theme found in several Biblical references offers age old wisdom. Ask, and it shall be given to you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.

Put These Together.  Don’t Worry. Ask for Help.

 Now, when I need answers, I place a simple request: POP IT IN.

 For example, I’m writing and get stuck. What I used to do was:

• Whine: You know the mantra.
• Worry: “What if I don’t get an answer?”
• Get angry and complain: “I don’t have time for this.”
• Feel like a helpless victim: “Why is this happening to me?”

 Now, I ask inwardly for help: “I need a headline. POP IT IN.”

 The answer comes – either immediately or after it incubates for a while.

 Prayers are always answered in divine right timing, Therefore, I let the concern go and do something else. This takes care of the seeking and knocking.

 Taking action refocuses me. It helps me to detach from fixating on results and when they should arrive.

 Easy. Simple. Clear.

Only Supportive Ideas Are Welcome.

 By the way, if an unsupportive idea pops in your head, pop it out. It’s your head, so claim dominion of it. Don’t give your power away to negative thinking. You have the power to pop in or out what goes in it.

 When those supportive ideas pop in, even if they’re a little outside-the-box, act on them. This is a key.

 Remember, everything is given according to your belief. If you allow the possibility, this really works.

 I invite you to experiment. Need answers? Relax and ask inwardly to “POP IT IN!”

WHEN BUTTONS ARE PUSHED

 Have you noticed people’s buttons getting pushed lately? Some respond with anger, frustration or depression. Others find that finger pointing, denial and avoidance are easier than talking things through.

 Opportunities abound to deal with issues, but some prefer to ignore the elephant in the room. It would take more than new glasses to correct that vision.

 Changing perspective helps: step back emotionally and observe in a detached way. This reminds you not to take it personally. But what should you do about it?

 Ask yourself: Is there something to get out of it, something to learn? Or is the point to get out of it and leave?

 And what’s the best action to take? This depends on the circumstances. But driving yourself bonkers and making yourself wrong only leads to a dead-end street.

 A lovely woman sent me a very ugly email. She wrote about demonic forces and people we once knew. She couldn’t be friends with me anymore because I was still associated with them, even though I wasn’t for years.

 Weeks later she apologized. Because of past injustices inflicted on her by this group, her deep pain was triggered. She obviously wasn’t herself when she wrote it.

 The point? I got out of it lessons of compassion; forgiveness; grace; and not judging as people make mistakes.

The action? Let go of the past and move on. We renewed our friendship.

 A few months later she sent another email explaining how she couldn’t be my friend because of my involvement with these same people.  

 The point? Get out of it. When people create too much drama and repeat patterns that they’re not shifting, it’s often best to step back.

The action? Don’t respond. Bless the situation and relationship and let them go.

 Here are tips on what you can do when buttons are pushed. Oh well, I can honestly say I’ve learned each one by doing the opposite.

 You can choose to push the easy button instead by using the following:

1. Breathe deeply in a relaxed way.
2. Step back emotionally and observe rather than become enmeshed with the story.
3. Listen to what’s being expressed and understand their perspective.
4. Let go of a need to be heard, validated and to express your viewpoint.
5. Ask yourself that even if you don’t like it: Why is it essential that others should think the way you think they should?
6. Tune in to your gut – what do you feel is true and the best action to take?

 “Forgive them for they know not what they do.” Then take action.

 Warning: using these tips will not give you the emotional exhilaration received from feeling right; trying to fix or rescue people; feeling victimized; having your ego stroked; expressing anger; trying to control; or the comfort of familiarity from reliving your sad story.

 It will:

• Bring you peace of mind and heart
• Awaken you to greater wisdom and awareness
• Honor others even if you’re sure they’ve lost their mind
• Reclaim your time and energy to enjoy life and pursue your goals
• Bring you better results in the long run.

 My cousin just called. “Be sure to tell people that everyone needs some silly in their lives and that laughter is the best medicine.” Thanks, Sharon, for the best ideas. Don’t take things too seriously. It’s all good.