Posts Tagged ‘abusive relationships’

Is This YOUR Time of Freedom? Special 4th of July Message

July 4, 2020

In recognition of the Fourth of July, I’m reposting a previous blog, with a few changes, that received great feedback. Note that you can see some of the highlighted words etched into the wall behind Thomas Jefferson – “mind of man.” May you enjoy the spirit of freedom! Virginia

While living in Washington, D.C., I often parked my car, ran up 58 steps and gazed in awe at the towering and erect presence of one of the great men who founded the United States of America. Thomas Jefferson also served as our third President from 1801 to 1809.

Open around the clock, sometimes I visited the Jefferson Memorial late at night when I could be alone in this hallowed sanctum.

Standing amidst the white marble steps and building, my eyes would gaze at the 129′ bronze statue as well as excerpts of the Declaration of Independence, whose principal author was Jefferson.

However, the reason I kept returning was to slowly turn in a circle to read the inscription under the dome:

I have sworn upon the altar of God eternal hostility against every form of tyranny over the mind of man.”  Thomas Jefferson to Dr. Benjamin Rush, September 23, 1800.

I didn’t realize at the time how these words, which still bring tears to my eyes, would be emblazoned within me. They inspired my lifetime passion, “upon the altar of God,” to help others and myself live in freedom through liberation of the “tyranny over the mind of man.”

The definition of tyranny includes the oppression, often cruel, of people or a government over others. Another aspect of tyranny is an unreasonable or arbitrary use of power or control.

For me, there’s a twist to this. It reminds me of a quote by American Navy Commodore Oliver Hazard Perry in 1813.  Most famously, it was quipped by cartoonist Walt Kelly on a couple of Earth Day posters when Pogo said:

The voice in your head, motivated by an insecure ego, can be your enemy and create the greatest form of tyranny.

These inner rants, such as you’re not good enough, you don’t deserve better and feeling full of regrets or fear, can be cruel, unreasonable, oppressive and arbitrary. If you allow this to dominate your thoughts and feelings, you relinquish control of your life to a limiting belief – because it’s a lie! 

Know that you have the power of choice! 

You can choose to listen to your inner essence/ soul/ spirit, whatever you choose to call the wise part within, instead.


Especially those familiar with my teachings about making conscious choices, you might be interested in this. When I was thirty years old, I had the first sentence of the following quote by Jefferson on a wall plate of a light switch:

“Freedom is the right to choose: the right to create for oneself the alternatives of choice. Without the possibility of choice, and the exercise of choice, a man is not a man but a member, an instrument, a thing.”

Pondering this message regularly, I knew there was more to it than I could understand at the time. I’m now aware of this:

We are free to choose. We are free to choose how we think and feel and believe! We are so free, we can choose fear or freedom.

We choose our thoughts, which impact our emotions, which create our lives. What hinders our freedom is allowing our minds to be tyrannized by any limiting beliefs. From anyone. From any circumstance or condition. From a part of our inner voice, our ego’s voice, that’s tyrannical.

 


A client showed me a picture of a tow truck driver who quickly and skillfully used multiple cables to turn upright a parked truck that had been hit by a car and had completely flipped over.

The driver was very good-natured, and his demeanor radiated a cheerful attitude and peace.

Both of his arms stopped below his elbows.

He had a prosthetic leg, too.

He is a living demonstration of choosing his attitude and outlook on life. He wasn’t tyrannized by his physical condition and whatever caused it.


 

We in America celebrate our country’s birthday on the Fourth of July, our Independence Day. It’s a time of freedom.

While talking with others about a life-changing break for freedom I made during the week of July 4th when I was 20, others shared their stories of freedom that happened around this time, too.

I broke free from a physically, mentally, emotionally and controlling abusive relationship. It took me seven times over two years to leave him without being hunted down and brought back. I made a decision to be free, and I started a new life the week of July fourth.

Soon the French will celebrate their day of freedom on July 14, Bastille Day. July is a time of freedom.

Tyranny or freedom? 

You can choose to hold in your mind’s eye the freedom and intentions that our forefathers envisioned while founding the United States.

What freedom and independence do you choose for you?

Start with freeing yourself from the tyranny of your mind, where no circumstance, nothing and nobody can touch you.

P.S. Know someone who might
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THE CAT (LITTER) BURGLAR!

November 2, 2013

??????????Let’s say you’re a cat.  Like a good kitty, you do your duty in a litter box and then leave to do other important cat business – like sleep. Later, as nature demands, you return to the box, and your signature kitty bon bons are gone! You might think someone stole my poop. From your human servants’ point of view, they’re doing their duty by removing yours.

Life. Are you living it or is it a living hell? It depends on your perspective.

In the past, I embraced a popular belief: you spot it; you got it. Aka: if you point your finger at someone, there are three fingers pointing back at you. While this is often true, it’s hard to believe an infinite God has limited life to only one reason for why all things happen.

I used to psyche myself out when I believed everything is a reflection of me. When street lights flickered as I walked by, I thought my inner light was on the fritz, and my self-confidence fluttered.  After discussing this with a mentor, he pointed out that the world doesn’t revolve around me.

Wiser, when this phenomena happened again, I noticed that street light poles have numbers and reported those that needed new bulbs.

This awakening may be a relief, especially for those in abusive relationships searching for how they’re a schmuck, too. The lesson may be that you’re not a sicko. The cad may be teaching you to find your inner cojones and not allow others to manipulate you into feeling inferior because of their controlling tactics.

It also works when people phone and assume you have a responsibility to listen to their incessant fears or problems.

When it becomes evident they want an audience and someone to rescue them from their own negativity instead of changing, it’s not a lack of compassion to cancel membership from the Dump-of-Collecting-Others’-Pain Club. I mean, would you open the door to your home to let someone unload their garbage? Why allow others to dump their emotional junk… except fear of their reaction that there’s something wrong with you?

Here’s a perspective:

If you think you’re usually the one who’s wrong, it’s probably them.

If you think others are usually the ones who are wrong, it’s probably you.

How’s your perspective working for you? Don’t let your beliefs or others’ opinions deter you from trusting your inner voice and truth. Then again, if you think the world centers around you, you won’t really care.