15 Ways to Be a Person of Value

August 9, 2021

This Soulgoal Missive was sent to my mailing list in September 2002.


“Try not to become a person of success, but a person of value.”

Albert Einstein


What makes someone great in your eyes? Footprints are etched on the sand of time through action. Preceding this comes a person of value.

We are works in progress. Step by step our lives become more real and meaningful. As we live our truth, we provide greater service to others. As Jesus said, “He that will be great among you let him serve.”

Being great is not just about what we do; it’s who we are and the choices we make. Following are some that are important to me. Few live all of them fully at any one time. They are wonderful to aspire to if we choose and when the timing is right. 

  1. Live authentically. Ring like a whole bell (ring true) vs. a cracked bell (looks like it should ring purely, but if you really listen, it’s off). Do not live an act because of a title or a role played in society or home or work or church. Be yourself. Follow the drumbeat of life you hear. 
  2. Follow your heart’s desire in everyday life. Everyday do something you love to do. Do what you were born to do, your mission, your calling – regardless how small the action. Live your dharma.


“To live is so startling that it leaves little time for anything else.”
 
Emily Dickinson


3. Courageously face and release core emotional baggage so you can live a life with freedom and maturity. Unmask and be true to your emotions and feelings, for keys to YOUR truth lie here. You are having a human experience: emotions and feelings are part of this and tools to discover who you are, what you are doing here, and how you are to serve.

4. Be a friend to yourself and others. Hold space for others to be and discover themselves and grow. Be non-judgmental and detached, yet present, caring, and supportive for others’ and your own life processes.

5. Be willing to explore intimacy with yourself, others, and the world rather than avoid relationships or just share the same space. Our greatest challenges and rewards come from relationship with others.

6. Keep your mind open, flexible, deep, and growing. Be an outside-the-box thinker. Allow new ideas to be possible so your life can grow.

7. Be financially mature and stable. Monetary difficulties may be caused from having an eight-year old make your financial decisions. The significance of addressing this issue means you have come to peace with some child part of yourself as well as claiming your place in the world.

8. Be spiritually awake and grow in YOUR truth, not a dogma you’re taught or what others have said about you. YOU matter because you value you. It doesn’t matter what others think. Ask yourself what you really know that’s true and positive; live your answer fully. Take time regularly to commune with the Highest aspect of Life.


Lives of great men all remind us
We can make our lives sublime,
And, departing, leave behind us
Footprints on the sand of time.
 
Longfellow


9. Know how to have fun, and take time to enjoy yourself. Humor and enjoyment are keys to life.

10. Practice physical health awareness and take care of your body. Adopt a youthful attitude toward your mind and body, regardless of your age or health; be young at heart. Respect and treat yourself well.

11. Live a balanced life. Too much work or play or any one thing creates a weak foundation. You may keep your balance for a while, but eventually your life may start to fall apart.

12. Live in the present moment. Now is all that exists. To live regretting the past or worrying about the future creates needless fear and stress. Yesterday and tomorrow are simply another Now. Now is the only moment to live, heal, and create the life you choose. Use time wisely rather than be controlled by it.

13. Say Yes to life in all its forms. Acknowledge you and others have a physical body in a third dimensional world that has joys and sorrows, pain and happiness, good and bad. Embrace it all. Each is an aspect of the bigger picture. Be sure to include the beauty.

14. Live life to its fullest. Don’t shy away from living. Have the courage to be who you are and enjoy life. Live passionately and creatively. Do your best.

15. Be love. Live with a grateful heart.

Your challenge, if you choose to accept it, is to choose three areas you’d like to focus on for the remainer of the year. Write them somewhere special, and review them periodically as a reminder.

With a zest for Life, 
Virginia   

If you’d like help to change
the way you see yourself,

contact me for a free consultation at:
virginia@soulgoals.com

I work with people who choose to share
their gifts or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck or could 
use new tools or support.

I help them ignite their Soul’s goals
and be richly compensated doing what
they love.

Copyright © 2021 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

What to Do When You’re at a Turning Point

August 2, 2021

 This Soulgoal Missive was sent to my mailing list in 2002.


Keep your eyes and ears wide open – and your mouth closed, if you wish to acquire the habit of prompt decision.
 
Napoleon Hill,
Think and Grow Rich


I invited my girlfriend on a company trip I won. Having a choice of select resorts, I chose to be on a ten-ton houseboat on the Colorado River at the Nevada-Arizona border. We were fortunate that the boat malfunctioned immediately after departure, so we traded it in for a five-ton model.

Neither of us knew anything about boating, including how to read a mariner’s map.  All the squiggly lines representing the shoreline looked the same, so the map was no help. 

To share how inexperienced we were, our boat floated away because we didn’t anchor it properly while visiting Hoover Dam. Someone caught and secured it in our absence. Our fun and memorable trip was filled with adventures like this.

While steering the boat, I watched aghast as I headed for a solid mass of land straight ahead.  I had to change direction quickly, but I couldn’t tell if the river turned to the right or left because the view was obscured.

The boat was big and heavy. I felt if I didn’t make my decision quickly, I never would have enough time to change course and would surely run into land.

Which way to go? It looked like the river turned left so I turned the boat in that direction. I was wrong; it was just a tiny inlet. If I thought I barely had time to turn the boat before, surely I would crash now. I quickly turned the wheel to go in the other direction… and had plenty of time to make the adjustment.

Over many years I’ve observed if I relax and trust this process, while prepared to act quickly if needed when the appropriate time comes, I make better decisions – without the panic and worry. I learned that if I am alert and in the moment, I have all the time I need to make a decision when the information comes.


Those who reach decisions promptly and definitely, know what they want, and generally get it.
 
Napoleon Hill,
Think and Grow Rich


Another incident occurred during my first television interview in my early twenties with a man seasoned in appearing on the media. He told me later that before speaking he always felt his inner juices begin to flow, but he didn’t feel them before that show.

However, as soon as I began to answer the commentator’s first question, his energy started to flow. Without this initial incentive to speak and knowing his experience, I probably would have let him do the talking, and he could have taken over the show. 

I learnedwhen the time comes, we have what it takes to do what we have to do. The brain may want to be comforted that everything follows an order it thinks it should. However, the flow is there when we need it, not when we think we need it.

We were prepared to speak; after that it was a matter of trusting the process.

A third lesson came while on a road trip with a friend. We came to a fork in the road, a turning point. Rather than stop to determine where we needed to go, he arbitrarily chose a direction and proceeded to go the wrong way at 60 miles an hour. It took a while to escape the highway maze, return to where we started, and get on the right track.

I learned if I come to a fork in the road and don’t know where I’m going, stop and assess my options rather than blindly waste my time on a 50-50 guess.

Decisions. If we’re not attached to the way we want things to go or the way we think they should go, answers come in their own way and in their own time, especially when we are prepared and ready to act.

Lessons I learned:

  1. You have all the time you need to make an appropriate decision when you have the information.
  2. There is a flow to making decisions. When the timing is right the flow is there, and sometimes not a minute sooner.
  3. Be prepared to act quickly when the information comes.
  4. Rather than guessing, check your map or plan to see where you’re going. Take necessary steps to prepare.
  5. Relax and trust the process.

Your challenge, if you choose to accept, is to consider a decision you would like to make. Apply the above points to strategize how to make it and then relax with the process KNOWING that you will make the right decision at the right time.

With a zest for Life,
Virginia   


Success Thought

When he approached a fork in the road, Robert Frost in his poem “The Road Not Taken” wrotethathe “looked down one as far as he could.”  Facing his decision of which way to go, he said:

“Two roads diverged in a wood, and I —

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.”



If you’d like help with decisions to move forward,
contact me for a free consultation at:
virginia@soulgoals.com

I work with people who choose to share
their gifts or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck or could 
use new tools or support.
I help them ignite their Soul’s goals
and be richly compensated doing what
they love.

Copyright © 2021 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

Are You Teachable?

July 26, 2021

A woman I knew took personal, salsa dancing lessons from a friend of mine who was a popular, salsa teacher in town. While the woman enjoyed dancing, she had little dance training nor did she have experience in the rhythm or style of Latin dance.

However, that didn’t stop her from telling my friend how she was teaching her wrong and what the steps were supposed to be. She wouldn’t listen to anything other than what she wanted to hear, wouldn’t see how the dance actually looked other than her impression of how she thought it was supposed to look, wouldn’t talk about anything other than her interpretation of what the dance was.

After a couple of classes, she decided to stop the lessons.

She wasn’t teachable, and she wouldn’t allow herself to listen or learn beyond her preconceived ideas.



Several years ago, another woman was desperate to join one of my mastermind programs. Part of the experience is 1:1 partnering sessions where every couple of weeks team members switch partners.

In the first week, this woman went to each of five team members to share her story.

After politely listening, each member then redirected her attention to solutions. She wasn’t interested.

Her intention was on others hearing her story and feeling validated. Her focus was centered on her confusion, her circumstances and how what she wanted to do wasn’t working, not on getting on track or creating actual results.

Five people called me individually to tell me how they really tried to help her, but she wasn’t open.  Not getting the type of attention she wanted, she left the group after the second week.



“Listen, be teachable. Laugh at good stories and learn to tell them. For as long as you are green, you can grow.”    Mother Teresa

“Be teachable. That is the whole secret.”      Vernon Howard



Being heard by others is a gift. Are you also open to receive?

What can you do to be teachable? Choose to be open to the guidance that life brings you moment by moment. Sounds too simple, but your intention will open you to learn.

Are you open to receive ideas and solutions or is your focus on having your story heard? Are you reliving familiar feelings when you repeat your story?

Are you teachable?

I work with people
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.

I help them enjoy their lives and
be richly compensated
doing what they love by aligning
with their Soul’s goals.

First posted on Soulgoals’ Blog, April 23, 2018

Copyright © 2021 Soulgoals. All rights reserved.

Angry? Frustrated? You’re Not Alone.

July 19, 2021

Here’s an excerpt of an email I sent a client who’s been experiencing challenges.

Recently, I’ve observed people transitioning from the way their life has been to something new and different. That can bring up a variety of feelings, some pleasant and others not so much.
 
I remember thinking in the early 1990s that my entire life was about frustration. There wasn’t any part of it that worked, from health, finances and career to my marriage. All were falling apart. This perfect storm became the springboard that has shaped the rest of my life of personal discovery and helping people like you.


   
Change is in the air, welcoming it, liking it, wanting it or not.
 
For some, it’s an exciting adventure.
 
For others, a dark cloud hangs overhead.
 
You, like the rest of us, have had a lifetime of listening to the false guidance of your ego, that façade of an identity. For you, it includes difficult emotions like anger and frustration. These emotions are like software glitches.
 
Here’s what Wikipedia says about glitches… computer glitches are incorrectly written software, incorrect instructions given by the operator, undetected invalid data, undetected communications errors…
 
You are not your software.
 
In contrast, your Essence is prompting you to listen within. This is the part of you that knows “all is well.”

Abraham-Hicks said:

“Your emotions are your indicator of how your active thought blends, or doesn’t blend, with the thought Source is thinking about the same subject in the same moment.”


The inner turmoil you’re experiencing is the conflict between your ego’s perspective and that of the Source within you.

Naturally, your ego is taking an all out stand for you to listen to its lies, lies that lead you to feel frustrated, angry and needing to sort things out.

To protect itself, it uses a type of logic in which it’s already trained you, indoctrinated into you, so you believe that it’s telling you the truth. It presents its case that leaves you feeling anger and frustration.

The logic only works if you see things from its limited and fearful point of view.

Habitual thinking creates entrenched neural pathways in the brain. These become your default, your easy “go to” ways you react. These reactions, instead of responses, don’t always serve you.

Just because ideas are in your head does NOT make them true!

However, you can most assuredly access your true Essence instead, as it is YOU!

A key is to differentiate between the whispers of your ego and your Essence.

The ego certainly doesn’t want you to be around positive people that shed light on how it manipulates you. This way it has you, back where you can be controlled by the stress and chaos of unsupportive emotions.

In defense of the ego, it thinks it’s protecting you. But these patterns were created from a child’s approach to survival. When presented with adult situations, the peace of your Essence offers greater insight and direction.

Ask your Essence to step forward to be heard, and choose to listen to its guidance.



If you’d like help for 
your life to be easier
while getting results YOU want,
contact me
for a complimentary
Do What You Love Break Free Session.

Email me at:

virginia@soulgoals.com

I work with people
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.

I help them be richly compensated
doing what they love by discovering
their Soul’s goals.

Previously posted in Soulgoals’ Blog July 2019


 Copyright © 2021 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

10 Inspirational Quotes to Get Rich

July 12, 2021


Wallace D. Wattles (1860-1911) wrote the classic The Science of Getting Rich because he believed becoming wealthy, getting rich, is a science in the same way there’s a system for how arithmetic works.

He shared that once this science is understood and implemented, people can become rich.

In 2006 during a Newsweek interview, Rhonda Byrne said that Wattles’ The Science of Getting Rich was her inspiration for her hit film and book The Secret, which demonstrates the Law of Attraction.

Below are quotes from Wallace Wattles.

With gratitude,

Virginia

  1. “The grateful mind is constantly fixated upon the best. Therefore it tends to become the best. It takes the form or character from the best, and will receive the best.”
  2. “You can never become a great man or woman until you have overcome anxiety, worry, and fear. It is impossible for an anxious person, a worried one, or a fearful one to perceive truth; all things are distorted and thrown out of their proper relations by such mental states.”
  3. “The very best thing you can do for the world is to make the most of yourself.” 
  4. “You must get rid of the thought of competition. You are to create. Not to compete for what is already created.”
  5. “By thought, the thing you want is brought to you. By action, you receive it.”
  6. “Abandon everything you have outgrown.”
  7. “Talk about the happy times you had in your youth, and forget all the unhappy times.”
  8. “Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen.”
  9. “Nothing that is possible in spirit is impossible in flesh and blood. Nothing that man can think is impossible. Nothing that man can imagine is impossible of realization.” 
  10. “You can become what you want to be.”

Know someone who might
like this? Please forward.

Time to make the most of yourself?
Find out how by contacting me for a
complimentary 
Break Free Session at:

virginia@soulgoals.com

http://www.soulgoals.com

I work with people who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or could use new tools or support.

I help them be richly compensated doing what
they love by discovering their Soul’s goals.

Original Soulgoals’ Blog posted on July 30, 2018

Copyright © 2021 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

Tyranny or Freedom? Special 4th of July Message

July 4, 2021
Thomas Jefferson Memorial

While living in Washington, D.C., I’d park my car, run up 58 steps and be in awe at the towering and erect presence of one of the great men who founded the United States of America. Thomas Jefferson also served as our third President from 1801 to 1809. 

I sometimes visited the Jefferson Memorial late at night when I could be alone in this hallowed sanctum. It was possible to do because it’s open around the clock.

Standing amidst the white marble steps and building, my eyes would gaze at the 129′ bronze statue as well as excerpts of the Declaration of Independence, whose principal author was Jefferson.

However, the reason I kept returning was to slowly turn in a circle to read the inscription under the dome:

I have sworn upon the altar of God eternal hostility against every form of tyranny over the mind of man.”  Thomas Jefferson to Dr. Benjamin Rush, September 23, 1800.


I didn’t realize at the time how these words, which still bring tears to my eyes, would be emblazoned within me. They inspired my lifetime passion, “upon the altar of God,” to help others and myself live in freedom through liberation of the “tyranny over the mind of man.”

The definition of tyranny includes the oppression, often cruel, of people or a government over others. Another aspect is an unreasonable or arbitrary use of power or control.

For me, there’s a twist to this. It reminds me of a quote by American Navy Commodore Oliver Hazard Perry in 1813.  Most famously, it was quipped by cartoonist Walt Kelly on a couple of Earth Day posters when Pogo said:



The voice in your head, motivated by an insecure ego, can be your enemy and create the greatest form of tyranny.

These inner rants can be cruel, unreasonable, oppressive and arbitrary. If you allow this to dominate, you relinquish control of your life. 

Know that you have the power of choice! 

You can choose to listen to your Essence, instead.
 



Especially those familiar with my teachings about “choosing,” you might be interested in this. When I was thirty years old, I had the first sentence of the following quote by Jefferson on a wall plate of a light switch:

“Freedom is the right to choose: the right to create for oneself the alternatives of choice. Without the possibility of choice, and the exercise of choice, a man is not a man but a member, an instrument, a thing.”

Pondering this message regularly, I knew there was more to it than I could understand at the time. I’m now aware of this:

We are free to choose. We are so free, we can choose fear or freedom.

We choose our thoughts, which impact our emotions, which create our lives. What hinders our freedom is allowing our minds to be tyrannized by any limiting beliefs. From anyone. From any circumstance or condition. From the tyrannical inner voice.

 



A client showed me a picture of a tow truck driver who quickly and skillfully used multiple cables to turn upright a parked truck that had been hit by a car and had completely flipped over.

The driver was very good-natured, and his demeanor radiated a cheerful attitude and peace.

Both of his arms stopped below his elbows.

He had a prosthetic leg, too.

He is a living demonstration of choosing his attitude and outlook on life. He wasn’t tyrannized by his physical condition and whatever caused it.

 



We in America celebrate our country’s birthday on the Fourth of July, our Independence Day. It’s a time of freedom.

While talking with others about a life-changing break for freedom from a highly abusive relationship I made during the week of July 4th when I was 20, others shared their stories of freedom that happened around this time, too.

Soon, the French will celebrate their day of freedom on July 14, Bastille Day.

Tyranny or freedom? 

You can choose to hold in your mind’s eye the freedom and intentions that our forefathers envisioned while founding the United States. 

What freedom and independence do you choose for you?

Start with freeing yourself from the tyranny of your mind, where nothing and nobody can touch you.


P.S. Know someone who might
enjoy reading this? Please forward. 

I work with people
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way

but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.


I help them live life more fully,
ignite their Soul’s goals

and be richly compensated doing what
they love.


Looking for freedom from anything
that may be tyrannizing you?
If you’d like help, contact me for a
complimentary Do What You Love
Break Free Session at:

virginia@soulgoals.com

This is a reprint from previous Soulgoals’ posts.

Copyright © 2021 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

Is Your Past Haunting You?

June 28, 2021

A mountain biker rode on a trail she’d been on at least 50 times. During some of those rides, she’d fallen and hurt herself. Because of this history, she was haunted by what the biking community calls “ghosts.”

She remembered the injuries, where the obstacles are located that caused her pain and avoided them.

Her experience changed, though, when she did this very same trail with a group of riders who traveled this way for the first time and were decades younger than her, including a woman who’s a national champion.

Not having negative memories, they tackled the trail with abandon.

While riding she said to herself, “Let’s pretend I haven’t been on this trail before.”

It was a whole new experience. She quickly rode over obstacles, that she’d been avoiding, and was unscathed. Didn’t fall down. Didn’t get hurt.

She told me that it’s the same in business and life.

Don’t let old ghosts from the past, which cause you to hesitate, get in the way of taking action and being successful.

Let go of the bad experiences.

What ghosts can you let go so you can tackle your life, business or work with abandon?

Find a way to create positive momentum so you get through without giving them a second thought.

P.S. Know someone who might like this? Please forward.

If you or anyone you know live with
ghosts of the past that continue to be
a haunting presence, please consider
a complimentary, break-free session.
It is possible to let go and move forward…
and feel the sweet taste of freedom!

I work with people who choose to share
their gifts or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how or feel stuck.

I help them ignite their Souls’ goals
and be richly compensated doing what
they love.


Originally posted on Soulgoals’ Blog, June 5, 2017, Let Go of Ghosts

Copyright © 2021 Virginia Goszewska, All rights reserved.

Is Your Old Comfort Zone No Longer Comfortable? Ready for better?

June 21, 2021
Looking at the sky through a canopy of leaves while lying down.

Parts of your life can be comfortable, and you’d like some things to stay as they are or were. Maybe it wasn’t perfect, but it was familiar.

However, life doesn’t always work this way.

Then things changed.

Why couldn’t others change their ways and leave you alone?

That’s what I felt on a beautiful morning while lying on a blanket nestled in a grove of trees, next to a pond, looking at the sky through a canopy of leaves. A gentle breeze was blowing. Ahh, tranquil, exquisite peace. Perfect.

Several minutes passed and then…slap. Something got on my arm. No problem. Back to looking at the sky through the leaves.

Ouch. What was that? It’s okay. What a lovely day!

Gosh darn it. That one bit me. Then another.

Baby ants. Maybe I’m on an ant pile.

Nope. There’s an ant path under the blanket by my feet, but I’m not blocking it, I thought.

Well, they had another opinion and kept pestering me until I had to move.

I didn’t want to change my spot because it was ideal with no rocks, twigs or tall grass.

With the passing of time, though, the Texas heat had escalated. Not finding another suitable location, I realized it was time to move on.

Regardless of what I thought they could do, I had to move. I had to change, not them.

That’s how life is sometimes. We get in our comfort zone and don’t want to move. But some cycles run their course, and it’s easier to change (or should I say potentially more painful to stay) even though we might not feel like it.

Do you need to move on from one of your old comfort zones?

Is it time to let go of someone or something or a belief you’re holding onto that’s no longer serving you?

Do you want others or circumstances to change so you can stay the same?

Whatever normal was, it no longer is.

Maybe it’s time to move on to, even though you may not be able to see it now, something even better!

Edited. Originally Posted on June 17, 2010, Time to Move On


Yikes! Change can be uncomfortable.
Staying the same when it’s time to move on
can be even more uncomfortable.
 

If you’d like help with your shift,
contact me for a free consultation at:
virginia@soulgoals.com

I work with people who choose to share
their gifts or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck or could 
use new tools or support.

I help them ignite their Soul’s goals
and be richly compensated doing what
they love.”

Copyright © 2021 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

Lost Something? Need Direction? This Will Help You Find It.

June 14, 2021

It’s like a pot of gold
at the end of the rainbow –
finding what you thought
was lost.

A woman, accompanied by a supermarket employee, apologized when she bumped into me. As she frantically swooshed by me again moments later, she turned her head to tell me that she was looking for her keys. I responded: “Say ‘God knows, and God shows.’” She saw her keys within seconds next to a weight scale!



A relative misplaced a big check with several zeroes on it for a couple of weeks. When she called me about it, I told her to repeat God knows, and God shows. Within two hours, I received a message that she found it in a dresser drawer.

We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.

Albert einstein


Why saying God knows, and God shows works.

  1. Using a practical application of Einstein’s quote, if your thinking is on loss or what you can’t find, then it’s not on the wavelength of finding. It’s like being on an AM station and looking for FM. You can’t find it because looking and finding are different frequencies.
  2. God knows, and God shows is a tool to let go and surrender. It allows you to let go of focusing on lack (what you don’t have or can’t find), and open to receive a higher energy to “solve our problems.” Think of it as surrendering a caterpillar’s perspective so you can enjoy a butterfly’s view.
  3. You release the need to find something, which often has energies like anxiety attached to it. As like attracts like, neediness attracts more reasons to feel anxious or frustrated. Even though it seems that it shouldn’t be this way, you’ll get more of whatever you’re feeling, not what you say you want. God knows, and God shows allows a greater power to refocus you and override limiting beliefs, such as “I don’t know where it is.” “I can’t find it.”

Don’t take my word for it. Experiment. Use these words while being open to the possibility of getting results, instead of being closed with a stubborn defiance of “prove it.”

By the way, you can use language like “the universe knows, and the universe shows,” if this feels more comfortable for you.


Let’s expand the application to business and life.

Looking for new business, your ideal job or to make more money? Don’t know where to find it? God knows, and God shows. You are now on the wavelength to attract new clients, greater wealth and more opportunities.

Feel stuck about anything? Instead of wallowing in disappointment, you’ll get on track faster in any area of your life by proclaiming, “God knows, and God shows.”

Follow the light to the end of your rainbow.

Happy manifesting.

I work with people who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how or feel stuck. I help them ignite their Soul’s goals and be richly compensated doing what they love.

If you’d like help finding direction,
contact me for a free consultation at
virginia@soulgoals.com


Originally posted on June 19, 2017

About Those CRAZY Makers in Your Life

June 7, 2021

What do you see?  A young woman or an old one? 
This optical illusion was created over 100 years ago.


Many problems in our world are because people see illusions of what they want to see and believe them to be true.


Have you noticed people crazy making and buttons getting pushed? Some respond with anger, frustration or depression. Others find that finger pointing, denial and avoidance are easier than talking things through.

 Opportunities abound to deal with issues, but some prefer to ignore the elephant in the room. It would take more than new glasses to correct that vision.

 Changing perspective helps: step back emotionally and observe in a detached way. This reminds you not to take things personally. But what should you do about it?



 Ask yourself: Is there something to get out of it, something to learn?
Or is the point to get out of it and leave?


What’s the best action to take? This depends on the circumstances. But driving yourself bonkers and making yourself wrong only leads to a dead-end street.

 A lovely woman sent me a very ugly email. She wrote about demonic forces and people we once knew. She couldn’t be friends with me anymore because she wrote that I was still associated with them, even though I hadn’t been for years.

Weeks later she apologized. Because of past injustices inflicted on her by this group, her deep pain was triggered. She obviously wasn’t herself when she wrote it.

The point? I got out of it lessons of compassion; forgiveness; grace; and not judging as people make mistakes.

 The action? Let go of the past and move on. We renewed our friendship.

 A few months later, she sent another email explaining how she couldn’t be my friend because of my involvement with these same people.  

The point? Get out of it. When people are perpetually crazy making, create too much drama and repeat patterns that they’re not shifting, it’s often best to step back.

 The action? Don’t respond. Bless the situation and relationship and let them go.

PLEASE NOTE: There are people who have mental and emotional considerations and are well-served by our support to receive help! I’m referring to those whose default patterns are often unconscious, repetitive, self-centered and create chaos. It’s part of our journey to learn the difference and set boundaries when appropriate.

The following ideas may help you with the crazy makers in your life. Oh well, I can honestly say I’ve learned each one by doing the opposite.

  1. Breathe deeply in a relaxed way. Relax your body.
  2. Step back emotionally and observe rather than become enmeshed with the story.
  3. Listen to what’s being expressed and understand their perspective.
  4. Let go of a need to be heard, be validated or express your viewpoint.
  5. Ask yourself, even if you believe they’re wrong: Why is it essential that others should think and act the way you think they should? Do you need their approval? Are you wanting control? Are you letting them make you feel unsafe or insecure? Are you judging them? Do you need to be right?
  6. Everyone has a right to their viewpoint. If you don’t like it, you don’t have to stick around, at least emotionally and mentally if you can’t leave physically.
  7. Tune in to your gut – what do you feel is true, which usually isn’t your story about it, and the best action to take? You know the answer if you have the willingness and courage to be quiet within and see it.


 “Forgive them for they know not what they do.”


 Using these tips will:

  • Bring you peace of mind
  • Awaken you to greater wisdom, awareness and empowerment
  • Honor others even if you’re sure they’ve lost their mind
  • Reclaim your time and energy to enjoy life and pursue your goals
  • Bring you better results in the long run.

Avoidance and resistance to honestly look at a situation are futile.

Tap into your inner mastership. Don’t be afraid to step back, observe, SEE, then act, lest you start crazy making yourself.

 If you don’t like what you see, envision something better. Focus on your new choice without the emotional drama.


Warning: using these tips will not give you the emotional exhilaration received from feeling right; trying to fix or rescue people; feeling victimized; having your ego stroked; expressing anger; trying to control; or the comfort of familiarity from reliving your sad story. 

 None of these provide long-lasting satisfaction anyway. 

 Using these tips will:

  • Bring you peace of mind
  • Awaken you to greater wisdom, awareness and empowerment
  • Honor others even if you’re sure they’ve lost their mind
  • Reclaim your time and energy to enjoy life and pursue your goals
  • Bring you better results in the long run.

Avoidance and resistance to look honestly at a situation are futile.

Tap into your inner mastership. Don’t be afraid to step back, observe, SEE, then act, lest you start crazy making yourself.

 If you don’t like what you see, envision something better. Focus on your new choice without the emotional drama.


Many problems in our world are because people see illusions of what they want to see and believe them to be true.


If you’d like help with any crazy making in your life,
contact me for a free consultation at:
virginia@soulgoals.com

I work with people who choose to share
their gifts or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck or could 
use new tools or support.

I help them ignite their Soul’s goals
and be richly compensated doing what
they love.”

Edited from Soulgoals’ published on March 25, 2011, When Buttons Are Pushed

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