Archive for the ‘Perspective’ Category

Do You REALLY Want What You Think You Want?

November 27, 2017

 

mirage2f

Want water or a mirage?

 

 

A woman, at a presentation I gave, told me how she was dreading an upcoming holiday.

She and her husband would soon divorce, and he would be with another woman, not with her and the children.

I inquired about their past, holiday celebrations. Were they fun, heart-warming, family times?

Oh no. Those were never happy times. He was usually drunk, and since she became sober, the two of them were even more distant.

What she wanted so dearly wasn’t that man during the holiday but a loving, family gathering.

Yet, she mourned the idea of not spending the holiday together — a lovely idea that didn’t exist at the best of times.

After a brief discussion, she was able to let go of her faulty idea that she’d be missing a wonderful, family experience, one they never had.

When she put this in perspective, her suffering stopped.

Later while in my Resolved for Results program, she was able to see more clearly.

Instead of the misery she felt previously, she became happily divorced. She realized she didn’t want a broken family with a person who had neither the interest nor ability to be part of a loving family.

In its place, she designed her ideal, family situation… and manifested it!

Sometimes we get an image of what we think we want and try to superimpose it on a current situation; we try to make it work — even though what’s happening doesn’t match up with what we REALLY want.

Same is true in relationships and business– people fall in love with an idea instead of the actual person or livelihood.

How can you know what you really want?

In Resolved for Results, I make the distinction this way:

“The soul of your goal satisfies the true intention of your objective. You feel fulfilled and happy when you achieve a goal that has the essence of what you choose and frustrated or disappointed when you don’t.”

Mirages are illusions that look real but ultimately are unfulfilling. They only will frustrate and disappoint when you get closer to them and see them for what they are.

A definition of mirage is something that appears real or possible but in fact isn’t actually so.

Often people chase mirages because they convince themselves they’re the real deal. Mirages look like water. They need and want water. So it’s water.

It reminds me of a woman who laughingly commented on her marriage. Prince Charming became Prince Alarming.

People see what they want to see. Most are happy with their illusions until they get close enough to see that the water was just a mirage.


Here’s why this is good news:

  • You can more clearly discern what you really want when you see what you don’t want,
  • You can change emotional habits, such as feeling disappointed, depressed, angry, frustrated, worried, or being down on yourself or others about what’s not working. Habits and beliefs are just patterns of thoughts and feelings that can shift.
  • You can train your mind to focus on what you really want instead of being fixated on what you don’t want.
  • You can learn how to trust yourself and use your feelings as a GPS.
  • You can enhance your practice of gratitude. (A footnote to my last post on continuous gratitude. I’ve been practicing this for a while, although I slip in and out of this habit. When I focus on continuous gratitude, no matter what, things always work out!)

You have power in your clarity.

Even if you realize that what you thought you wanted is out of alignment with what you really want, you can now redirect your focus. Because of your new focus, you can manifest something better than you ever imagined!

By the way, if you reach the conclusion that you’re wrong, you screwed up and think beating yourself up will whip you back in shape, think again.

This thinking is a mirage.

Life is designed as a learning experience, which aids your growth. It’s not created with the purpose of disapproving of you. So don’t should on yourself.

It’s all good, including you!

 

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy this post? Please share.

I work with people, at any age,
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.

I help them be richly compensated
doing what they love by aligning
with their Soul’s goals.

Copyright © 2017 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved.

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Gratitude Like This WILL Change YOUR Life

November 20, 2017

perspective

I rudely interrupted myself while grumbling in my head about things I didn’t like.

It’s when I remembered that I recently found out that three people, who played significant roles in my life, left the planet a few years ago. In addition, at least 56 of my high school classmates passed on.

Yet, I’m still here, and I am gifted with another day to make more mistakes, learn, change, grow, love, and Be.

You’re reading this, which means you and I are in the same gifted boat. Even if your life has a few or lots of things going on that make you feel like you’re riding on choppy water, you’re alive. There’s definitely hope. Life can get better and greater.

Here’s how you can turn the tide to flow in your favor even more.

Gratitude is a powerful energy that shifts our focus away from what we don’t have, what’s not working, who done us wrong or who’s missing in our lives, how goofy the world is and everyone’s woeful inadequacies.

When we redirect our attention to gratitude, in spite of appearances that seduce us to believe the opposite, we open ourselves to receive beyond our wildest expectations. The impossible becomes possible.

I wondered how different people and religions value gratitude. With the upcoming American holiday of Thanksgiving, and my interest in sharing this attitude of gratitude with you, here are some quotes I found.

These also reflect why gratitude affects your success, money, relationships, life, health, happiness… and everything! As like attracts like, it’s Law of Attraction at its finest.

Be sure to keep reading, because soon I’ll share a way of giving thanks that, when you practice it, WILL change your life.


Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into clarity…. It turns problems into gifts, failures into success, the unexpected into perfect timing, and mistakes into important events. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow.– Melodie Beattie


 

When I gladden my heart, I awaken the energy of gratitude. It is an energy that elevates and expands, and brings me to a deeper place in my heart. By opening my heart, I can feel gratitude deeply. Gratitude shifts the moment by shifting me. Nothing around me changes; I change.

Things do not create gratitude; the energy of joy inside of me creates gratitude. –  Deepak Chopra

[By the way, just like the sun shines above cloudy skies, underneath the funkiness you might feel at times is joy. Joy is always present; you’ll see it if you choose to look in its direction.]  



Be not like those who honor their gods in prosperity and curse them in adversity.  In pleasure or pain, give thanks! – Judaism.  Midrash, Mekilta to Exodus 20.2



[Here’s why focusing on what you don’t have creates lack. With gratitude, you focus on what you have.]

For whoever has, to him shall be given, and he shall have more abundance: but whoever has not, from him shall be taken away even that he has. – Matthew 13:12, American King James Version 


 

[Look how similar this is.]

If you are grateful, I will give you more.  –  The Koran 14:7



[Don’t wait for one day of the year to be grateful.]

And if your gratitude is strong and constant, the reaction in Formless Substance will be strong and continuous; the movement of the things you want will be always toward you… 

It is necessary, then, to cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you; and to give thanks continuously. Wallace D. Wattles, The Science of Getting Rich

 


What’s the life-changing way to have gratitude?


During a group discussion of the above-mentioned book by Wattles, I suddenly heard this in a new way. It’s not just occasional gratitude, it’s living in a state of gratitude continuous gratitude.

Gratitude, continuous gratitude, will change your life!

I made a decision for this moment, and then extending it to this minute (more moments), this hour, today, this week, lifetime and beyond, to give thanks continuously. 

Will you join me?

I know I will get distracted from my choice to live in continuous gratitude. When I’ve practiced it, though, my life continues to improve.

However, when I catch myself straying into the hinterlands, I can shift my focus away from lack, my pity pot and what’s not working to being grateful instead.

It won’t matter how many times I’ll fall off my wagon of continuous gratitude; I can always get back on.

So can you.

Happy Days of Gratitude and Giving Thanks!

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy this post? Please share.

I work with people, at any age,
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.

I help them be richly compensated
doing what they love by aligning
with their Soul’s goals.

Copyright © 2017 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved.

Guilt, Know-It-Alls & Being #1

November 6, 2017

Wire

Are you in a self-imposed prison with freedom in view?

 

Feeling guilty had been drilled into her by her family throughout her life.

When my client was at the top, business associates and family triggered these guilty feelings by their passive-aggressive behaviors. She felt like she was doing something wrong.

Not feeling good about the price she paid for her success, her sales slipped.

People in her family had jobs. Furthermore, what’s a woman doing being successful, especially in her own business?! They had to work hard in their employment; why should she be any different?

She didn’t realize it was their own jealousy, insecurity, a need to control and their disappointment in themselves for not going after their dreams that were the underlying culprits of others’ manipulative behaviors.

Ever hear of the lobster syndrome or the crab mentality?

When either of these is alone in a lidless container, it can escape.

However, when sharing their enclosure, none can get out because they will be pulled back down, even into boiling water.

In society or business, this can happen when people are bettering themselves, and others try to bring them down.

How can they do that? Through guilt, fear, making others feel they’re doing something wrong, shunning, shaming and the threat of being ostracized if they don’t fit in with the community.

Some religions exert control by indoctrinating their followers with the fear of damnation or how their future lives will be affected.

Previously, my client couldn’t stay away from her cell phone out of fear of missing calls from prospective customers. Working hard is acceptable as a road to success.

So when she fulfilled her goal of a five-week vacation, and still remained #1, it was at the expense of others’ disparaging remarks.

Even though at the top of her game and years away from what most consider retirement age, she couldn’t stop thinking about leaving the business world behind.

She told me about a close friend and business associate. “There’s something about him lately that rubs me the wrong way – so I’ve distanced myself — although we’re working on a deal together. With him, it’s a debate or he knows some expertise about things. He’s done and knows everything.”

She was exhausted by critical people: if it’s not done their way, then in their way of looking at things, it’s being done wrong.

“Because I am surrounded by that thinking and attitude, my cup runneth over with this. My response is to disassociate with people who have these behaviors.”

When I asked where she’s seen those patterns before, she recalled that her mother and sister had the same habit of being critical know-it-alls. Both parents ruled by creating guilt in others.

We discussed that no matter where you go, there you are. If she continued to react, she’d attract more people who would act the same, wherever she went.

She realized that unless she changed, even if she left her business, she’d continue to run into similar, annoying behaviors from others.


Programmed from childhood, traits like lack of confidence, guilt and worry can prompt you to continue brainwashing yourself with limiting beliefs, even when those who put these ideas in your head aren’t around. 

Don’t listen to your inner, critical voice that bullies you and makes you question your ability to succeed or be happy. It lies.

That nagging voice reflects how the people who told you that nonsense feel about themselves. It’s not about you.

Your true essence guides you with a kind, non-judgmental and supportive voice.


Her insight: this session made her step back and look at the bigger picture.

She realized that she won’t be affected by others when she has a different perspective. And when her buttons are no longer pushed, she won’t attract people who think like that.

By the way, she’s back to being #1 and having her best year ever. Life is more fun, and she feels free now that she no longer reacts to guilt trips and know-it-alls in the way she did before.

You can step out of your self-imposed prison of any limiting beliefs, even if you don’t know what’s holding you back.

Start by having confidence that believing in yourself brings.

Remember, those voices to the contrary are figments of someone else’s imagination that they projected on you.

Freedom and success are yours if you’re open to receive them.

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy this post? Please share.

 
I work with people, at any age,
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.

I help them be richly compensated
doing what they love by aligning
with their Soul’s goals.

Copyright © 2017 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved.

Wondering What to Do or If Things Will Work? Help Is On the Way!

October 25, 2017
 

what to do

Feel alone, wondering what to do? Will things work out?

 

Many long for more but are unclear of either their direction or how to get what they want.

During recent travels, here’s what I heard about people’s lives, directions and goals:

  • Feel discontent because they want something different and more aligned with their purpose, but they have little or no clue as to what that is, let alone how to attain it.
  • Have a dream or a goal but don’t know how to get it.
  • Not moving fast enough to get what they really want.
  • Lack clarity about the best people/company/direction to move forward with regarding work, business or launching a new venture.
  • Are stuck because they know they’re worth more but aren’t clear on how to take action confidently and effectively to get the best results.
  • Aren’t acknowledged, appreciated or paid well for their gifts or services.
  • Are well paid in their current job, but they’d rather focus on their gifts.
  • Feel unsatisfied and unhappy even though they’re in a seemingly good position, personally or professionally.
  • Pay the bills but want more in life.
  • Harbor an underlying fear that they’ll make a mistake, be embarrassed and waste valuable time and energy.
  • Don’t want to face disappointment or fail.

There’s always a way out so you can live the life you choose! You have a choice:

  • Spin in indecision.  However, a spinning top won’t attract clarity and favorable outcomes.
  • Alternately, align with the belief that, regardless of appearances, all is well and help is on the way.

If you focus your attention on the latter, you become a magnet for success.

To expand on this understanding, here’s an excerpt from my Resolved for Results program.


Drowning in a Sea of Wondering if Things Will Work

I wrote this to one of my team members who was going through challenges:

I really know what it’s like when we feel our life is sinking and we’re drowning in a sea of wondering if things will ever work — or if we’ll be submerged too long and sink before a life saver comes to save us.

That being said, regardless of this eddy of emotion, we simply have to believe and will eventually know that there’s always at least a piece of driftwood to carry us to the shore. That’s part of the lesson.

Often, we’re so preoccupied splashing about and gasping for air that we don’t divert our attention to see the Coast Guard has been calling our name to let us know we’re safe.

Our journey involves shifting from our incessant splashing to looking for and being grateful for what’s available.

Then we refocus our vision and see that help is on the way.


You can:

  • Sit in frustration, anger, confusion, blame, regret, disappointment or beating yourself or others up. These can not bring you results you choose and are self-defeating frequencies. That’s like being tuned to a heavy metal radio station wondering when classical music will start to play.
  • Alternately, even if you don’t have a clue how, trust that help is on the way. In doing so, you align yourself with and are open to miracles, fortuitous coincidences and being in the right place at the right time while feeling that success can happen for you. Yes, you.

The first step to your success is beginning or deepening one idea: Things are working out for you, you know what to do and help is on the way.

Then tune in to your next step, because one is always available for you.

It may be taking action on something that’s been rolling around your head for a while or asking for help.

Maybe it’s to pause and do nothing in the moment because the timing isn’t right.

Keep it simple.

You probably tried not trusting yourself or life. From direct experience, you saw the results. Why not approach things from a different perspective?

You deserve the fulfillment your new alignment brings!

 

By the way, know someone who might enjoy this post? Please share.   

I work with people, at any age, who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support. I help them be richly compensated doing what they love by aligning with their Soul’s goals.

“I Honestly Didn’t Think I’d Ever… Be Happy.”

October 16, 2017

 

Depressed icelandic sculpture (2)

Sad Statue in Reykjavik, Iceland

 

“I think Virginia has met the person she can’t help,” confessed my client about her previous thoughts. However, feeling better than the dark pit she’d been in for years, she decided to take my Resolved for Results program a second time.

At 60-years-old, she told me she was “habitually, genetically, psychologically, emotionally and medically depressed.” 

For over ten years, she was “flatlined, checked out and not showing much interest in anything.” Add to that traits she learned during her childhood from an emotionally unstable parent: judgmental and overly critical of others and herself.

We met at a gym many years earlier. She recalled that I was friendly towards her and did some kind of work about career and business. She thought about contacting me but never did.

Just before her divorce from a 27-year marriage and leaving the house she helped to design and build, she reached out for help.

“I had to do something different. I had to trust someone because my voice, what I had been telling myself, wasn’t reliable.”

This was a world away from who she was at 16-years-old.

As a teenager, she was an apprentice to an artist from whom she received extensive lessons and even traveled with this man and his family. Visiting them every summer in Santa Fe, they became another set of parents to her for seven years.

It was during their trip to Mexico that he developed his distinctive style that catapulted him to become a world-famous artist whose work is now displayed in the Smithsonian.

Eventually, they went their separate ways.

My client married a good man and joined him to create a successful, construction business.  She believed she “should” have been happy, yet she spiraled down into an ever-deepening depression.

She beat herself up heavily for this, wondering what was wrong with her.

Used to blaming herself, she didn’t realize her self-proclaimed fault wasn’t the reason for how she felt.

Not doing what she loved was at the core of her depression.

She talked herself into believing this didn’t matter, yet she now sees that “this was the key to my soul!”

How she went from “the dark side” to the light.

My client began to experience feeling up and then returned to her familiar down periods. As she learned new tools and perspectives, she was able to sustain feeling good for longer periods of time.

Yet, she didn’t trust feeling light because it was different from the darkness that became her uncomfortable, comfort zone.

Unbeknownst to her, she’d been in preparation for when her new self emerged, which she now calls “a person I don’t even know who’s now come back.”

When her famed teacher came to her town, she felt well enough emotionally and mentally to attend his exhibit with another artist friend.

Little did she realize that being in this environment would trigger her turning point. Her spark for living reignited, and her whole life transformed into a joy that she didn’t believe she’d ever experience.

One month since her “shift” and in a few days from the time of my writing this, she’ll be a guest at this artist’s home in Santa Fe, New Mexico, for a couple of weeks. After, she’ll visit friends in Colorado, a trip she wasn’t up to making a few months ago.


Because of her extra-ordinary and personal background as his student and apprentice as well as being considered one of the family, she’s enthusiastically considering a professional recommendation to write a memoir about her experience with this artist and his early days.

It took her nine months to make this dramatic turnaround and overcome more than a decade of sadness and inertia. She got her life back.

“Before and during the beginning of my working with you, I never believed that I would be anything other than dark and depressed.”

There was no way she would have dreamed up or planned the way life orchestrated what’s now happening.

Her change was possible because she:

  • Resolved to change
  • Got help
  • Gained clarity
  • Let go of the past
  • Unveiled and released beliefs she didn’t know were holding her back
  • Learned new tools and perspectives
  • Followed the positive voice in her head instead of the negative ones
  • Set powerful intentions. 

All of these changed her energy, which led her to be at the right place at the right time and willing to receive her heartfelt desires and happiness… even though they seemed impossible!  


One month after meeting her old teacher, she sent me this text:

“Still up!!!

I honestly didn’t think it would ever happen.

Thank you for believing in me and teaching me how to be happy.”

After years of isolating herself and being withdrawn from the world, now she “can’t stop talking.”

Her enthusiasm for life is contagious.

She told me, “I can’t thank you enough. You saved my life.”

It’s never too late to do what you love and be happy!

Don’t give up.

It’s worth overcoming your mental chatter and limiting beliefs that you can’t do what you love because of fill in the blank reasons.

You are worth it.

You can be financially successful. You can build your business to stellar levels, enjoy your ideal work or share your gifts in a BIGGER way.

You can be happy.

Starting now, you can create your best life ever! It’s your choice.


 

I work with people, at any age, who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support. I help them be richly compensated doing what they love by aligning with their Soul’s goals.
Copyright © 2017 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved.

Wonder What Your Future Will Bring?

October 14, 2017

Jekyl hyde

“When you get to be my age, everything scares you,” an 82-year-old told me. “Just watching TV is enough to make you afraid. You’ll see.”

Because I’ve heard similar comments over my lifetime of “when you get to be my age” followed by limited thinking, I paused.

I noticed how she shared her negativity in a joking way while her attitude depressed and subdued people around her.

This time instead of reacting, I replied, “I made a decision not to be afraid.”

Silence.

In contrast, I had a delightful conversation with Ms. Belle, a 79-year-old. She commented that looking at the way we’re talking, anyone would think we’re old friends. We met only 20 minutes earlier in a neighborhood store.

She told me, “You’ve got to be positive. Life is short.”

She’s amazed at how she meets lovely people wherever she goes, and that there are so many wonderful people in the world.

She goes to the gym and rides a bicycle. One day, she realized that she loves to exercise. She enjoys talking and having fun with others while there, too.

Ms. Belle shared with me the importance of keeping our memory, especially as some people will take advantage of you if you don’t remember things.

Hint: Just like you can make a decision not to be afraid, you can choose to retain your memory, even if you feel it’s not as good as you’d like it to be now. Start by no longer talking about and focusing on how you don’t have a good memory!

So much of life and business is about decisions and perspective.

Which attitudes, behaviors and actions of yours (and others) are you willing to tolerate? Do you see people (including you) and life as inherently bad or good?

Your answers will determine your success. Negativity won’t breed positivity.

Everyone has beliefs. Many are held onto so dearly that you might feel that if you stopped believing them, you’ll go straight to that inferno down below.

Some beliefs upon which you base your life may be the very ones that are holding you back!

If you allow fear and a habit of complaining to control you, you could find yourself on a slippery slope that doesn’t lead to success.

Many blame others, blind to connecting the dots of how their own choices and beliefs created their circumstances.

Wonder what your future will bring? It will bear the fruit of your current and past thoughts, feelings and attitudes, as the two above-mentioned women demonstrate.

Your future will bring you the products of your beliefs just as your present is a reflection of your past ones.

You have the power within you to choose to be afraid of your own shadow or to be courageous.

In this moment, you can change the way you feel about you and the mental picture you carry about yourself and your future.

You can decide nothing will stop you from living the life and having the business or work of your dreams, in spite of the odds.

 

I work with people, at any age, who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support.  I help them be richly compensated doing what they love by aligning with their Soul’s goals.

Copyright © 2017 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved

An Eclipse, Hurricane Harvey & a Bigger Design

August 28, 2017

IMG_0863 (2)

Nature has her way of clearing energy, including that which hibernates unseen for centuries from wars and negativity. Wind and water through floods and rains are some methods she uses to purify as well as encourage people to make changes.

It’s been described to me this way. The planet is a living organism, and nature is like a farmer rotating her crops. There are times we must look for a different place to grow, higher ground.

Speaking of energy, the power of supportive thoughts and prayers makes a difference.

It’s a good time to take a moment now to send positive energy.

In one week, we’ve seen changes from a total eclipse to Hurricane Harvey.

At the beginning of the week, people’s differences evaporated as they came together during a total eclipse.

Days later, differences cease to exist once more as people risk their lives to help friends and total strangers in the worse disaster Texas has seen.

For every experience, however calamitous, there’s always a silver lining. 

While living in New York City, I wondered what could cause people there to shift their attitudes and come together. When 9/11 came along, I got my answer. As we witnessed the worst of humanity, we also saw its best as the world pulled together in support.

Amidst the shock and devastation caused by Harvey, we see courage, selflessness, kindness, caring, respect, compassion, love and people helping people. Humanity at its best.

It often takes things to get really bad before we refocus on what’s real and truly important.

Through crises, we role model to ourselves behaviors that we can continue to choose on a daily basis.

Opinionated soap boxes and self-serving, judgmental attitudes seem petty. Past worries become small.

You’ve experienced challenges; some were life-changing.

Maybe your material things got shuffled around, and life didn’t turn out the way you expected (if that’s even possible for anyone). Your struggles stretched you to the max. The mirror of how you saw yourself was shattered.

The master gardener of life tilled your fields making room for different crops. Better crops.

Look at a current challenge in your business or life.

Step back and put things in perspective. Maybe you have to take so many steps back to get a better view that you feel like you’re falling off a cliff.

If you let go of your preconceived ideas, can you see a bigger design?

You’re learning something. Dodged a bullet you didn’t know was coming. Made changes you prayed for but didn’t know how to make. You grew.

Use your experiences as a course correct for your business, work and life instead of letting them beat you down.

To see a more immense picture, realize that you’re on a rock orbiting a star called our sun that’s 93 million miles away while spinning at nearly 1000 miles an hour. 

By doing so, you can feel something more vast than everyday life as well as your place in the universe.

Put on your energetic, eclipse glasses, see the sun and be open to receive inspired “soulutions.”


P.S. Know someone who might
enjoy reading this? Please forward.

I work with people, at any age,
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.

I help them be richly compensated
doing what they love by aligning
with their Soul’s goals.

Copyright © 2017 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved

Do You Wish Things Had Turned Out Differently?

August 7, 2017

Not happy with her life, she felt depressed for quite a while.

Although her current employment has gratifying moments, she’s caught in a dead-end job that’s light years away from the passion that lights her up.

Why did she stay in a funk for so long? She kept reflecting on her past and projecting it on her future.

In her ego’s way of thinking, success would continue to elude her no matter how hard she tried.  “Nothing will ever work, so why bother?”

Another watched big parts of her life and years-long business eclipse into oblivion, and she felt that she was “losing everything.”

Yet another looked back at a lifetime of accomplishments and compared them to others. She thought life (and money) had passed her by while she was preoccupied dredging through drama, mediocrity and poor choices in relationships and affiliations. Ignoring the good stuff, she felt her grand total added up to not being not good enough.

The ego likes to judge and compare and creates suffering in the process.

However, when each looked deeper, their perspectives changed.

To sum it up in a few words, that was then and this is now.


Now, each is focused on starting a new chapter.

 


Life is full of twists and turns, and the longer you live, the more ups as well as downs occur. Your interpretation of them determines if you see these as mostly peaks or mostly valleys.

Regret is a complete waste of time and energy.

Once, while talking to one of my teachers, I said I felt like several years of my life were a wasteland. With a big world out there, my world felt barren.

He asked, “What did you learn?”

Interestingly, while outwardly my life lacked adventure, it produced one of my biggest growth experiences.

What I thought was a dry desert was actually part of my schooling to more effectively help people get unstuck and, instead, be richly compensated doing what they love. 

When momentum from my former, fast-paced activities slowed down, I thought my life had stalled. I later realized I had been on a fast train heading in the wrong direction. Shifting gears provided an opportunity to let go of my old ways that I thought were my “right” ways.

My new track was the route to greater authenticity, fulfillment and success.

You are scripting your life and business.

You don’t have to try to defend or justify why you are where you are now because of your past history.

Simply live in the present and move forward.

If you don’t like parts of it, how can you put them in a more empowered perspective?


Ask your inner wisdom how everything that’s happened in your life and business has all been a foundation for your next chapter.

 


If you wished your life or business had turned out differently, this is your moment to gain insight and, as if you’re writing a play, create your next act. Script it so that the best is yet to come.

With gratitude,

Virginia

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy reading this? Please forward.

P.P.S. All stories are shared after having received permission. Their intention and mine is that others may benefit.

I work with people, at any age, who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support. I help them be richly compensated doing what they love by aligning with their Soul’s goals.

Fly with the Eagles and Don’t Let the Turkeys Get You Down

July 31, 2017

 

You’re feeling great and in the flow. You can do it. This is your time. Nobody can stop you… until some turkeys start pecking away at you, and you want to run.

Experiencing this way too often, and although she’s at the top of her business, competent and relatively young, my client told me that she couldn’t stop focusing on retirement.

She felt that she could no longer handle the stress created from customers’ unrealistic demands and exhausting herself to get them to see reason.

During her Soulgoals session, she realized that she was attracting people who brought out a quality in her that was like her father – being judgmental. People weren’t acting the way she thought they should.

As like attracts like, she was magnetizing people who would bug her so that she could be “justifiably” judgmental.

To counterbalance her father’s inflexible attitude, she played the role of the peacemaker throughout her life. Now that he’s passed and she’s tired of “battling,” she thought those days were over.

However, his judgmental attitude was still alive inside her because she absorbed his energy, and she continued to attract people that required her to be the peacemaker.

She connected the dots and saw that unless she made inner changes, these patterns would follow her wherever she went – even into retirement.

She was on the verge of letting go of a great career instead of letting go of the unwanted energy she harbored within. It was time to stop blaming others and her business as they weren’t the problem.

Done with attracting challenging people who were like her father, she decided to release her judgmental energy and change her perspective.

“I don’t want to put up with other people’s stuff… my big insight is that if you leave, you’re not going to get away from your issues. Deal with it through journaling.”


Another client found herself consistently attracting unqualified clients.

One got nastily irate when she told him that his application didn’t go through.  Although she quickly let him go as a client, she knew she had to change her focus to stop attracting turkeys.

Whatever is focused upon grows.

In the past, she complained about how many applicants didn’t qualify, so she kept having more applicants who didn’t qualify.

Now, she focuses her attention on having great applicants who both qualify and purchase her high end products, all with grace and ease.

Her new perspective is working.

Are there the same (annoying) types of people or circumstances showing up in your life again and again?

Journal about how you feel when the turkeys get you down.

  • Does how you feel remind you of people from your past?
  • When you notice the patterns, choose to let them go.
  • Replace them with a new perspective.
  • After, refocus on your wonderful dreams and goals instead of what you don’t want.

It’s time to soar with the eagles. You deserve it.

With gratitude,

Virginia

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy reading this? Please forward.

P.S. All stories about my clients’ experiences are shared after having received their permission in advance. Their intention and mine is that others may benefit.

I work with people, at any age, who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support.

I help them be richly compensated doing what they love by aligning with their Soul’s goals.

Are You Having Fun Yet?

June 26, 2017

 

I was fortunate. I didn’t lose my home or life from floods that caused FEMA to take residence in my town for several months a couple of years ago. However, months of dealing with mold in my house and body took a heavy toll on my health and finances.

Even though three vets told me there was nothing to do for my sick cat, and one suggested I put her to sleep, she decided she wasn’t ready to go and stayed with me for two more years. This translated to round-the-clock caretaking that exhausted me.

After all that passed, including my precious companion, I knew it was essential to go out and participate in life again.

Otherwise, my focus would’ve been stuck on the adversities of my past. As like attracts like, it would’ve put me on a downward spiral to the “same ole, same (challenging) ole.”

A road trip beckoned that awakened me to enjoy life. Since then, I’ve been finding ways to have fun and laugh – from an entertaining drag show to an airboat ride on the Colorado River to a free Bollywood dance class on the same stage that the ballet uses. For months, every week I saw new-to-me performances, including music from around the world to The Temptations and Four Tops.

Additionally, there were art museums, plays, ziplining, hiking at state parks, restaurants, massages and a sake tour.

There are magnets on my fridge holding ticket stubs and flyers from the many programs I attended, reminding me to continue to play.

By the way, thanks to online deals from companies like Groupon, LivingSocial and Travelzoo, fun things to do can be found super cheap. Many museums have a day or weekend every month where you can go for free, and some concert halls offer 2 for 1 specials.

In the process of getting out, I rested, had fun, got my mojo back and felt like I was living again. My business grew, too.

When I decided it was time to settle down and get back to work, and didn’t go out for a few weeks, my business and income slowed down, too! 


I remember the exact instance, before I started to play, when this thought came to me:  If I died and went to the other side, what would I say I’d done for myself?

My answer was: I almost got caught up. So many things on my To Do list were getting done, but there was so much left to do. And, yes, I’ve helped a lot of people and have accomplishments.

But what about me?

What would you say about how you’ve had fun and taken care of yourself?


I’ve recognized that when I don’t take time to play, the inflow and outflow of life energy becomes out of balance.

It reminds me of Mastermind Principle #6 from my course Resolved for Results:  I believe I am worthy and deserve to achieve my goals or something better, and I choose to use my personal empowerment on my behalf, which allows me to serve life more fully.

What’s your legacy beyond family, work, accomplishments and making money?

Are you having fun yet?

Life is designed to be satisfying. If it’s not, it’s time to change your perspective, and do something different.

The weird thing is that when we break free from primarily focusing on the dutiful acts that we have to do, and include time to play, our lives, business and work improve.

Old age is no longer another notch on the yearly calendar. Age is a state of mind. A way of being.

Look at life as energy and vibration. When you raise your energy by having fun, you’re on the wavelength to attract longevity, more money, better clients, relationships and health.

If you haven’t already, you now can give yourself permission to play, have fun and enjoy the rich variety that the world has to offer.

Before, I didn’t even know what it meant to play.

Where to start? Find one activity that looks interesting and do it.

Have you ever been not that hungry? Then after a eating few bites, you realized you couldn’t stop. Playing and fun can be like that, too.

By creating more fun, as well as sharing it, you might even spark romance!

Are you ready to make this lifetime count beyond work, duties and survival? Go have fun!

With playful gratitude,

Virginia

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy reading this? Please forward.

I work with people who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how or feel stuck. I help them ignite their Soul’s goals and be richly compensated doing what they love.