You’re More Than Enough

Cornucopia: an abundant, endless, overflowing supply. Allow your abundance to come in.

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Your egoic self will seduce you to believe that you’re limited and not enough. It goes on and on with endless versions of not enoughs… you’re not good enough; you don’t have enough; you’re not a good enough parent or child; you’re not pretty or handsome enough: your weight isn’t good enough; you don’t match up to others; you’re not smart enough; you don’t have enough money. Get the idea?

It invades your thinking, but it lies!

“You’ve been criticizing yourself for years and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens.”

Louise Hay

How Can You Tell If You’ve Been Invaded Like The Walking Dead?

Ask if what you believe is true. (Your ego will convince you it’s true.) You feel that you’re right, they’re wrong. You have an emotional charge. You can’t shake negative feelings and mind chatter. Your filter believes you see clearly, but your vision is clouded by a finger pointing at inductees into your Villains’ Hall of Fame.

If you’re reading this with some comprehension, in this moment, your ego has taken a hike. Left to the ego’s devices, this information does not compute. Just like what happened in the following example.

Trekkie Talk

Data, an enlightened, artificial intelligence life form who’s programmed to help humans, understands this concept as he talks with a primitive clone of himself in Star Trek Nemesis:

Data: You have been programmed to gather information that can be used against this ship.

Clone: I do not understand.

Data: I know.

And Data detached the clone from its power source.

When the ego’s program is running, there’s little understanding that the ego is controlling you. How is that possible? It imposes its faulty rationale, a filter that’s been influencing your perspective, that causes you to think and feel negatively and with limitation.

One of its programs is you against “them.” “Them” can be a generic somebody or something other than you. There’s little or no responsibility taken for one’s actions. You’re the victim. “They” are out to get you. Be afraid of what others might do to you in the future.

No, that’s not just the way you are. That’s the way you’ve been programmed by family, TV, church, school, friends, etc.

You can be running this computer-like mental and emotional software unconsciously. You can be completely unaware that its logic isn’t what you think it is. You may even adamantly defend it.

When this occurs, just like Data’s clone, there’s little recognition that the ego’s lies are actually working against you. For example, fearing the worse possible outcomes for the future isn’t protecting you. In truth, you’re setting yourself up for failure because of a misuse of your imagination.

It’s like seeing through a glass darkly as you become a pawn to do the ego’s bidding.

However, you can detach from this power source, just like Data did with his clone!

When You are in charge, your true Essence, you’ve got the bandwidth, clarity and energy to go beyond fear, make your dreams real and enjoy your best life.

Liberation of Lunacy (LoL)

I created a tool that my clients experience at the beginning of my Soulgoals’ program, called Liberation of Lunacy (the LoL Technique) to free yourself of doubt, limit, fear and lack through your power of choice, perspective and putting your Essence in charge. We’re all a little bit crazy when the ego takes over control. Meanwhile, here’s how to start freeing yourself when the siren sings you’ve really got a hold on me.

The ego will echo what you think, believe, say and feel emotionally. So quit beating yourself up. Stop blaming and making yourself and others wrong. Refrain from complaining about, comparing yourself and feeling superior or inferior to others.

Replace feeling a separation between you and “them” with an awareness of a connectedness with all of life.

Edited Excerpt from Soulgoals’ Blog, originally posted on June 18, 2018

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Ready to reap the harvest of feeling good enough?

Contact me to learn how at:

virginia@soulgoals.com
http://www.soulgoals.com

I help women to tune in to their true Selves, see clearly and live their personal and professional dreams.

Copyright © 2023 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

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Do You Believe in You?

Society grooms us not to trust or believe in ourselves. Instead, we’ve been trained in self-doubt.

We’ve been taught to elevate the opinion of others, to question ourselves, especially when compared to the power of spiritual forces, experts, leaders, books, spouses, family, friends, bosses, teachers, doctors, world events and even TV commercials.

However, if we don’t learn to trust and believe in ourselves, we’ll be at the mercy of the whims and, very often, limited ideas of others.

If you think there’s something wrong with you, you’ll attract experiences to validate that your beliefs are true.

If you shift your perspective to see yourself as a divine child or a child of an unlimited universe, you open yourself to receive greater abundance, success, love, happiness and health. 

97% of human bodies are made of stardust, and an analysis of over 150,000 stars in our Milky Way galaxy proved this is literally true.

The Crosby, Stills & Nash song was right: “We are stardust. We are golden. We are billion year old carbon.”

So stop making yourself small. Your heritage is divinely celestial! 

If you don’t believe in you, why should anyone else?

If you don’t believe in you, how will you be able to tune in to your inner guidance, the sweet whispers of direction from within? How will you be able to distinguish it from the nagging voice in your head of fear, worry, doubt and self-belittlement?

If you’re waiting for others, many who live by flawed beliefs, to recognize your worth, you may be better served by recognizing your own value.

Consider this. If others don’t believe in themselves, they aren’t capable of fully believing in you.

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Be vigilant about how you picture yourself.

Do you see aspects of yourself as not good enough? Can you see how your life would change if you believed you have access to infinite possibilities, even if you don’t have a clue as to how to manifest them?

Right now, breathe and take a moment for yourself. Breathe and go beyond the chatter of others and your thoughts.

The more you practice this, the more you’ll discover your self-worth and that you are deeply loved.

When you tap into this essence of you, you feel good about yourself.

When you feel good about yourself, you open to receive abundance and success as you go beyond lack– lack of love, money, time, health, business, fun, acceptance, respect and happiness.

And you believe in you!

Edited excerpt from Soulgoals’ Blog, November 13, 2017

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If you’d like support
to believe in yourself more
and the benefits it can bring,
contact me
for a complimentary
Soulgoals’ Break-Free Session
by phone.
Email me at:
virginia@soulgoals.com

I work with people who choose to
enhance their lives or share their gifts 
in a BIGGER way but
don’t know how, feel stuck or could use new tools or support.

I help them be richly compensated doing what
they love by connecting with their Soul’s goals.

Copyright © 2022 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

You’re a Winner!

Did you ever have any of these thoughts?

• I’m not good enough.
• If people knew what I feel behind my confident smiles or where I came from, they’d be surprised.
• I’m afraid of failure and success.
• I’m waiting for the other shoe to fall – yeah, it’s good now but it probably won’t last.
• What if I make (another) mistake and lose it all?
• There’s either not enough money or, when I have enough, I’m afraid it’s going to run out.
• Maybe there’s something wrong with me.

I’ve lost count of how many people have told me stories like this. Here’s an example.

A woman was burdened with similar perspectives throughout her life. They played in the background of her thoughts like a persistent, low-grade fever.

Even though her business more than quadrupled in four months, she was afraid of not having enough time and that her success might be short-lived.

During her Belief Release session, she woke up to her personal power and let go of clouded thinking.

How? She replaced doubt, limit, fear, anxiety and lack through her power of choice, perspective, love and putting her Essence in charge.

She felt happy and freer than ever before.

Recognize that YOU’RE A WINNER RIGHT NOW!

• Take one instance where you don’t feel good about your life or business, and change your perspective.
• Reframe you and your situation from being a loser to a winner.
• What did you learn?
• How did you become stronger?
• Choose to let go of the past.

Now, with you as the artist of your business and life, what do you choose? What does your ideal business or life look like?

When you clear out your inner cobwebs, you’re able to hear the inner whisperings of your Essence and receive guidance and direction for your next step and greater success.

Stop listening to others’ fears and limitations that they’ve projected on you that you may have believed were true. They’re not.

Recognize you were born a winner regardless of circumstances then or now… and YOU STILL ARE A WINNER!

This is a new moment.

Go forth and create something wonderful.

Reprinted from Soulgoals’ Archives, June 22, 2016

http://www.soulgoals.com

I work with people
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.
I help them be richly compensated
doing what they love by aligning with
their Soul’s goals.

Copyright © 2020 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

Guilt, Know-It-Alls, Being #1 and Challenging Times

Are you in a self-imposed prison with freedom in view?

 

Feeling guilty had been drilled into her by her family throughout her life.

It was a way others could control her. If they could disempower her through feeling guilty, she could kowtow to their ways and do and be what they wanted.

Because she was used to feeling guilty, especially when my client became #1 in her territory, business associates and family triggered those familiar feelings.

She felt that she was doing something wrong by being successful.

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Unconsciously, here’s the message others sent: if I make you doubt yourself or feel bad about yourself, I’ll bring you down to a place where your success no longer makes me feel uncomfortable. Who do you think you are? What’s wrong with you? Be more like me… and whine about how life’s unfair.

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People in her family had jobs. Furthermore, what’s a woman doing being successful and making more money than them, especially in her own business?! They had to work hard in their employment; why should she be any different?

Not feeling good about the price she paid for her success (she received negative input from others), her sales slipped. A part of her was trying to stop being a target that resulted in guilty feelings.

She didn’t realize it was their own jealousy, insecurity, a need to control and their fear and disappointment in themselves for not going after their dreams that were the underlying culprits of others’ manipulative behaviors.

Ever hear of the lobster syndrome or the crab mentality?

When either of these is alone in a lidless container, it can escape.

However, when sharing their enclosure, none can get out because they will be pulled back down, even into boiling water.

In society or business, this can happen when people are bettering themselves and others try to bring them down.

How can they do that? Through guilt, fear, anger, making others feel they’re doing something wrong, shunning, shaming and the threat of being ostracized if they don’t fit in with the community.

Some religions exert control by indoctrinating their followers with the fear of damnation or how their future lives will be affected.

Previously, my client couldn’t stay away from her cell phone out of a concern of missing calls from prospective customers. Her belief was that working hard is the road to success.

So when she fulfilled her goal of a five-week vacation, and still remained #1, it was at the expense of others’ disparaging remarks.

Even though at the top of her game and years away from what most consider retirement age, she couldn’t stop thinking about leaving the business world behind.

She told me about a close friend and business associate. “There’s something about him lately that rubs me the wrong way – so I’ve distanced myself — although we’re working on a deal together. With him, it’s a debate or he knows some expertise about things. He’s done and knows everything.”

She was exhausted by critical people: if it’s not done their way, then in their way of looking at things, it’s being done wrong.

“Because I am surrounded by that thinking and attitude, my cup runneth over with this. My response is to disassociate with people who have these behaviors.”

When I asked where she’s seen those patterns before in childhood, she recalled that her mother and brother had the same habit of being critical know-it-alls. Both parents ruled by creating guilt in others.

We discussed that no matter where you go, there you are. If she continued to react, she’d attract more people who would act the same, wherever she went.

She realized that unless she changed, even if she left her business, she’d continue to run into similar, annoying behaviors from others.

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Programmed from childhood, traits like lack of confidence, guilt and worry can prompt you to continue brainwashing yourself with limiting beliefs, even when those who put these ideas in your head aren’t around. 

Don’t listen to your inner, critical voice that bullies you and makes you question your ability to succeed or be happy. It lies.

That nagging voice reflects how the people who told you that nonsense feel about themselves. It’s not about you.

Your true essence guides you with a kind, non-judgmental and supportive voice.

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Her insight: this coaching session made her step back and look at the bigger picture.

She realized that she won’t be affected by others when she has a different perspective. And when her buttons are no longer pushed, she won’t attract people who think like that.

By the way, she’s back to being #1 and having her best year ever. Life is more fun, and she feels free now that she no longer reacts to guilt trips and know-it-alls in the way she did before.

You can step out of your self-imposed prison of any limiting beliefs, even if you don’t know what’s holding you back.

Start by having confidence that believing in yourself brings.

Remember, those voices to the contrary are figments of someone else’s imagination that they projected on you.

There are many ways you can feel imprisoned, especially during a pandemic.

But good things can emerge during challenging times.

Freedom and success are yours if you’re open to receive them.

Make the most of this moment. Isolation can give birth to unimaginable heights.

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You think you’re challenged? Look at Nelson Mandela’s life (1918 – 2013; passed away at 95):

• Mandela, as a young lawyer, joined the African National Congress (ANC) in 1944 to advocate for an end to South African apartheid, an oppressive system of government built on racial segregation. 
• In 1963, he and other cohorts were sentenced to life in prison.
• He spent 18 years in the cell, seen above, that was 43 square feet.
• The floor was his bed, and he used a bucket for a toilet.
• He was forced to do hard labor in a quarry.
• He was allowed one visitor a year for 30 minutes.
• He could write and receive one letter every six months.
• In 1990, having served 27 years in prison, he was released by South African President de Klerk.
• In 1993, he won the Nobel Peace Prize with de Klerk.
• Mandela became president of South Africa in 1994.

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P.S. Know someone who might benefit from this post? Please share.

Think about you on the other side of the pandemic.
Can you see that you’re no longer willing
to put up with the old way you’ve been doing things?
Do you know you can consciously create your life?
If you’d like to learn about a complimentary session so 
you can start fresh, contact me at

virginia@soulgoals.com

http://www.soulgoals.com

I work with people
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.

I help them be richly compensated
doing what they love by aligning
with their Soul’s goals.

Updated from Soulgoals’ Archives posted on November 6, 2017

 

Copyright © 2020 Soulgoals, All rights reserved.

Is That Really What You Think About Yourself?

 

Your thoughts about yourself create your future.

So what have you been telling yourself about you recently?

Stupid, smart, not good enough, grateful?

Is that really what you think about yourself?

If you want more money, which thinking do you believe works best?

• I really need it, but I don’t think I’ll ever get paid what I’m worth.
• (In spite of my circumstances) I feel that more money is coming to me.

If you want more of something, feel as if you already have it. You won’t get what you want (or you could be miserable or not hold onto it) if you’re waiting for it to appear before you believe it.

A client, whose goal includes increasing her sales and income, wasn’t talking like someone who already had the wealth she desired. She was working hard and fast, and her curt attitude had an adverse affect on her support team who, in turn, did small actions to annoy her.

During a Soulgoals Session, she realized that if she took a few more minutes to have smoothe interactions with them, instead of communicating by terse emails, she would receive more help and have less stress and irritation. Their attitude about her was disruptive and consumed unnecessary amounts of her time and energy.

She had been seeing herself as someone pushing to get to the top instead of being there.

You have to be an energetic match for what you want.

If you want better health, act as if you have it. You’ll send a message of health to your cells.

A woman, who had a stroke, has been making tremendous progress. She definitely has the potential of continuing to overcome its effects, too. She’s learned much about herself during her year of recovery and has her sights set on wellness.

She emailed me about a vacation tour she planned to take with disabled people, but she decided not to go because she’s choosing to attend another event instead.

I replied: Not going “may be a good thing so you don’t identify with being disabled and surrounding yourself with others who believe that about themselves. How you see yourself is a key to the direction you’ll find yourself in the future. See yourself able-bodied.”

Your thoughts about yourself are just mental concepts. Your thoughts and ideas are only pictures in your mind, and often times they were downloaded into your brain by others.

The tendency is to accept all of your perceptions as real because they’re in your head. However, they’re limiting because more possibilities exist than you can imagine.

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Wallace D. Wattles says it this way in his book The Science of Getting Rich:
 

“To look upon the appearance of disease will produce the form of disease in your own mind, and ultimately in your body, unless you hold the thought of the truth, which is that there is no disease; it is only an appearance, and the reality is health.

 “To look upon the appearances of poverty will produce corresponding forms in your own mind, unless you hold to the truth that there is no poverty; there is only abundance

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What do you think about yourself? 

Do you say you want more money but think about yourself as poor, in lack or needy?

Do you say you want greater health but see your body as sick?

How you identify who you believe you are now is writing your script for who you’ll be in the future.

If you focus on your outer circumstances, you’ll repeat them in the future. Focus on what you choose instead.

You embody unlimited potential for whatever you choose or something better. You can think about yourself in this way.

Don’t be fooled by appearances, and certainly don’t beat yourself up because you feel you’re not good enough. Your current circumstances exist because of old ways that you thought about yourself.

You always have a choice about how you feel and think, even if things seem out of your control.

Imagine what life would be like if you see yourself as the hero of your dreams coming true!

With gratitude,

Virginia

P. S. Know someone who might be interested in this TIP?  Please share.

I work with people, at any age,
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.

I help them be richly compensated
doing what they love by aligning
with their Soul’s goals.

Copyright © 2018 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved.

Change Is in the Air. Are You Wondering if You’re the Problem? (No, there’s nothing wrong with you.)

Their lives were going well, but they felt dissatisfied. Although highly successful and in different professions, the sentiments shared during their individual sessions were the same. They felt unmotivated or they were being held back. Something needed to change, and they didn’t know what or how to move forward.

They thought there was something wrong with themselves. They wanted to “blow out the cobwebs” that left them feeling “blocked, not ready and needing help to get back in the game.”

There was nothing wrong with them.

There’s nothing wrong with you, either.

It’s transition time.

In short, everyone, that includes you, has gone through a lot of changes and learned from them.

You’ve grown from your experiences. Even though things may look like business as usual, they’re not. If you try to do what you’ve always done in the way you’ve always done it, you may find yourself uninspired, confused, stuck, botching deals, making conversational faux pas or wondering if you’re missing the boat.

It’s simply time to move forward in a new way. But how?

Let’s start with the way you think. Thoughts travel on a bandwidth.

If you feel sorry for or bad about yourself, for example, the thoughts that follow will be negative, full of why you can’t do things and how nothing will work. And you’ll prove yourself right. You can’t, and they won’t work.

If you shift your focus to you’re okay, and you’re open to what God or the universe will bring you, then you can receive fresh ideas and directions to create results exceeding your expectations.

This shift can be a tricky bugger because you’ve been receiving ideas for your next step for a while, but subtly. The pointers to your shift may be something you’ve dismissed or thoughts you brushed aside as an interesting possibility. However, these may hold the keys to your future!

Look for what interests you, what makes you curious.

For instance, one of my clients realized it was time to jumpstart her marketing, but she had zero motivation to do it in the way she had in the past. Additionally, although she’s active on Facebook, she’s never approached it as a serious marketing tool.

The more we talked, she realized she had not one but three ideas that had been coming to her about how to use Facebook for business. This piqued her interest and energy to take action.

She also saw that when the world splats her like a bug with what she doesn’t want, she has a choice. Either to let it deflate her or turn it around to clarify and shift her focus to what she does want.

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Another woman, who was flatlining about how to approach lucrative and creative business contracts she’d already won, became quite enthusiastic when an idea came to her about a personal project she could pursue.

Here’s why finding something that interests you is important:

Generally, if we have several things working and one that isn’t, we tend to focus on the one that isn’t. This bandwidth pulls us DOWN so we block our creative flow.

By focusing on something that interests us, we open ourselves UP to new visions that can inspire us to take action. When this happens, ideas can come to us about everything, including how to break free from whatever holds us back.

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What fleeting thoughts have you had recently about new directions? Maybe they seemed to come from left field, so you didn’t pay much attention to them. However, they could be clues for you.

What interests you?  What excites you? Explore that.

The world awaits your specialness that only YOU have! The discomfort of change is your Inner Essence nudging you forward to your greatness.

Take a step.

There’s always a way out.

P. S. Know someone who might be interested in this?  Please share.

I work with people, at any age,
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.

I help them be richly compensated
doing what they love by aligning
with their Soul’s goals.

Copyright © 2018 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved.

This Is How the Universe Hears You & Why You Get (or Don’t Get) What You Want!

 

How would you feel if someone felt this way about you? The same thing happens to your energy when you feel this way about yourself.

 

A client told me how she was able to manifest small things during a coaching session last week. However, when it came to her business, she wasn’t closing people on her offers. She had big programs and small ones. Lately, she just wasn’t successful in selling anything. Several times during her session, she was hard on herself because things went wrong. “Why did I attract people who don’t have money? Even if they have the money and need what I do (and she does it well), they don’t get back with me. What am I doing wrong?” Despite her positive sounding words, she communicated a non-verbal message that there’s something wrong with her. People aren’t as attracted to people who don’t feel good about themselves, unless it mirrors how they feel about themselves or their opinion of you. It often brings up guilt, blame and shame. When I pointed out how she consistently was judging herself, she told me, “I had critical parents and never got compliments from them. Now I feel that if I can’t do things perfectly, there’s something wrong with me.” Have you ever felt like her or questioned yourself in a condemning way, too? “I’m building that muscle of approving of myself, but my habit of doing the opposite has been stronger.” As like attracts like, the only thing that happens when you’re negative is that you attract more negativity. That puts you in an energetic conundrum because the more you feel good, the more success you attract. When you don’t feel good, your energy attracts more things that keep you from feeling good. This includes business, money, health, weight, people and your happiness. Disapproving of yourself doesn’t feel good. Even if it momentarily motivates you to action, success won’t last because there’s negative energy at its foundation. The universe and others “hear” your disapproval energy, and they give you back more of the same — more things to disapprove of. The energy of disapproving of yourself, others and situations is why you get (or don’t get) what you want! The more you let go of disapproval energy, the more you’ll attract your cherished goals. What a sacrifice. To get what you really want, you have to feel good about yourself! Right after our session, my client had two consultations to present her offers. She emailed me this after she talked with them: I had two prospects back to back after I talked to you, and both took my BIG packages!! Yay! You’re a miracle worker, Virginia. I’m grateful she gave me permission to share her story with you.   My last post was titled “What Do People Hear You Say When You’re Not Talking?” What they “hear” is the energy you transmit. Dogs sense energy, such as fear. People sense energy, too. A reason why first impressions are quick is that it takes a fraction of a second for people to read your energy. People hear you disapproving or approving of yourself even when you don’t speak or say all the right words. Experiment with approving of yourself. And what a price you’ll pay for doing it. You’ll feel good!   P.S. Know someone who might enjoy this post? Please share. I work with people, at any age, who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support. I help them be richly compensated doing what they love by aligning with their Soul’s goals.

Do You REALLY Want What You Think You Want?

 

Want water or a mirage?

 

 

A woman, at a presentation I gave, told me how she was dreading an upcoming holiday.

She and her husband would soon divorce, and he would be with another woman, not with her and the children.

I inquired about their past, holiday celebrations. Were they fun, heart-warming, family times?

Oh no. Those were never happy times. He was usually drunk, and since she became sober, the two of them were even more distant.

What she wanted so dearly wasn’t that man during the holiday but a loving, family gathering.

Yet, she mourned the idea of not spending the holiday together — a lovely idea that didn’t exist at the best of times.

After a brief discussion, she was able to let go of her faulty idea that she’d be missing a wonderful, family experience, one they never had.

When she put this in perspective, her suffering stopped.

Later while in my Resolved for Results program, she was able to see more clearly.

Instead of the misery she felt previously, she became happily divorced. She realized she didn’t want a broken family with a person who had neither the interest nor ability to be part of a loving family.

In its place, she designed her ideal, family situation… and manifested it!

Sometimes we get an image of what we think we want and try to superimpose it on a current situation; we try to make it work — even though what’s happening doesn’t match up with what we REALLY want.

Same is true in relationships and business– people fall in love with an idea instead of the actual person or livelihood.

How can you know what you really want?

In Resolved for Results, I make the distinction this way:

“The soul of your goal satisfies the true intention of your objective. You feel fulfilled and happy when you achieve a goal that has the essence of what you choose and frustrated or disappointed when you don’t.”

Mirages are illusions that look real but ultimately are unfulfilling. They only will frustrate and disappoint when you get closer to them and see them for what they are.

A definition of mirage is something that appears real or possible but in fact isn’t actually so.

Often people chase mirages because they convince themselves they’re the real deal. Mirages look like water. They need and want water. So it’s water.

It reminds me of a woman who laughingly commented on her marriage. Prince Charming became Prince Alarming.

People see what they want to see. Most are happy with their illusions until they get close enough to see that the water was just a mirage.

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Here’s why this is good news:

• You can more clearly discern what you really want when you see what you don’t want,
• You can change emotional habits, such as feeling disappointed, depressed, angry, frustrated, worried, or being down on yourself or others about what’s not working. Habits and beliefs are just patterns of thoughts and feelings that can shift.
• You can train your mind to focus on what you really want instead of being fixated on what you don’t want.
• You can learn how to trust yourself and use your feelings as a GPS.
• You can enhance your practice of gratitude. (A footnote to my last post on continuous gratitude. I’ve been practicing this for a while, although I slip in and out of this habit. When I focus on continuous gratitude, no matter what, things always work out!)

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You have power in your clarity.

Even if you realize that what you thought you wanted is out of alignment with what you really want, you can now redirect your focus. Because of your new focus, you can manifest something better than you ever imagined!

By the way, if you reach the conclusion that you’re wrong, you screwed up and think beating yourself up will whip you back in shape, think again.

This thinking is a mirage.

Life is designed as a learning experience, which aids your growth. It’s not created with the purpose of disapproving of you. So don’t should on yourself.

It’s all good, including you!

 

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy this post? Please share.

I work with people, at any age,
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.

I help them be richly compensated
doing what they love by aligning
with their Soul’s goals.

Copyright © 2017 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved.

Guilt, Know-It-Alls & Being #1

Are you in a self-imposed prison with freedom in view?

 

Feeling guilty had been drilled into her by her family throughout her life.

When my client was at the top, business associates and family triggered these guilty feelings by their passive-aggressive behaviors. She felt like she was doing something wrong.

Not feeling good about the price she paid for her success, her sales slipped.

People in her family had jobs. Furthermore, what’s a woman doing being successful, especially in her own business?! They had to work hard in their employment; why should she be any different?

She didn’t realize it was their own jealousy, insecurity, a need to control and their disappointment in themselves for not going after their dreams that were the underlying culprits of others’ manipulative behaviors.

Ever hear of the lobster syndrome or the crab mentality?

When either of these is alone in a lidless container, it can escape.

However, when sharing their enclosure, none can get out because they will be pulled back down, even into boiling water.

In society or business, this can happen when people are bettering themselves, and others try to bring them down.

How can they do that? Through guilt, fear, making others feel they’re doing something wrong, shunning, shaming and the threat of being ostracized if they don’t fit in with the community.

Some religions exert control by indoctrinating their followers with the fear of damnation or how their future lives will be affected.

Previously, my client couldn’t stay away from her cell phone out of fear of missing calls from prospective customers. Working hard is acceptable as a road to success.

So when she fulfilled her goal of a five-week vacation, and still remained #1, it was at the expense of others’ disparaging remarks.

Even though at the top of her game and years away from what most consider retirement age, she couldn’t stop thinking about leaving the business world behind.

She told me about a close friend and business associate. “There’s something about him lately that rubs me the wrong way – so I’ve distanced myself — although we’re working on a deal together. With him, it’s a debate or he knows some expertise about things. He’s done and knows everything.”

She was exhausted by critical people: if it’s not done their way, then in their way of looking at things, it’s being done wrong.

“Because I am surrounded by that thinking and attitude, my cup runneth over with this. My response is to disassociate with people who have these behaviors.”

When I asked where she’s seen those patterns before, she recalled that her mother and sister had the same habit of being critical know-it-alls. Both parents ruled by creating guilt in others.

We discussed that no matter where you go, there you are. If she continued to react, she’d attract more people who would act the same, wherever she went.

She realized that unless she changed, even if she left her business, she’d continue to run into similar, annoying behaviors from others.

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Programmed from childhood, traits like lack of confidence, guilt and worry can prompt you to continue brainwashing yourself with limiting beliefs, even when those who put these ideas in your head aren’t around. 

Don’t listen to your inner, critical voice that bullies you and makes you question your ability to succeed or be happy. It lies.

That nagging voice reflects how the people who told you that nonsense feel about themselves. It’s not about you.

Your true essence guides you with a kind, non-judgmental and supportive voice.

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Her insight: this session made her step back and look at the bigger picture.

She realized that she won’t be affected by others when she has a different perspective. And when her buttons are no longer pushed, she won’t attract people who think like that.

By the way, she’s back to being #1 and having her best year ever. Life is more fun, and she feels free now that she no longer reacts to guilt trips and know-it-alls in the way she did before.

You can step out of your self-imposed prison of any limiting beliefs, even if you don’t know what’s holding you back.

Start by having confidence that believing in yourself brings.

Remember, those voices to the contrary are figments of someone else’s imagination that they projected on you.

Freedom and success are yours if you’re open to receive them.

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy this post? Please share.

 
I work with people, at any age,
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.

I help them be richly compensated
doing what they love by aligning
with their Soul’s goals.

Copyright © 2017 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved.

“I Honestly Didn’t Think I’d Ever… Be Happy.”

 

Sad Statue in Reykjavik, Iceland

 

“I think Virginia has met the person she can’t help,” confessed my client about her previous thoughts. However, feeling better than the dark pit she’d been in for years, she decided to take my Resolved for Results program a second time.

At 60-years-old, she told me she was “habitually, genetically, psychologically, emotionally and medically depressed.” 

For over ten years, she was “flatlined, checked out and not showing much interest in anything.” Add to that traits she learned during her childhood from an emotionally unstable parent: judgmental and overly critical of others and herself.

We met at a gym many years earlier. She recalled that I was friendly towards her and did some kind of work about career and business. She thought about contacting me but never did.

Just before her divorce from a 27-year marriage and leaving the house she helped to design and build, she reached out for help.

“I had to do something different. I had to trust someone because my voice, what I had been telling myself, wasn’t reliable.”

This was a world away from who she was at 16-years-old.

As a teenager, she was an apprentice to an artist from whom she received extensive lessons and even traveled with this man and his family. Visiting them every summer in Santa Fe, they became another set of parents to her for seven years.

It was during their trip to Mexico that he developed his distinctive style that catapulted him to become a world-famous artist whose work is now displayed in the Smithsonian.

Eventually, they went their separate ways.

My client married a good man and joined him to create a successful, construction business.  She believed she “should” have been happy, yet she spiraled down into an ever-deepening depression.

She beat herself up heavily for this, wondering what was wrong with her.

Used to blaming herself, she didn’t realize her self-proclaimed fault wasn’t the reason for how she felt.

Not doing what she loved was at the core of her depression.

She talked herself into believing this didn’t matter, yet she now sees that “this was the key to my soul!”

How she went from “the dark side” to the light.

My client began to experience feeling up and then returned to her familiar down periods. As she learned new tools and perspectives, she was able to sustain feeling good for longer periods of time.

Yet, she didn’t trust feeling light because it was different from the darkness that became her uncomfortable, comfort zone.

Unbeknownst to her, she’d been in preparation for when her new self emerged, which she now calls “a person I don’t even know who’s now come back.”

When her famed teacher came to her town, she felt well enough emotionally and mentally to attend his exhibit with another artist friend.

Little did she realize that being in this environment would trigger her turning point. Her spark for living reignited, and her whole life transformed into a joy that she didn’t believe she’d ever experience.

One month since her “shift” and in a few days from the time of my writing this, she’ll be a guest at this artist’s home in Santa Fe, New Mexico, for a couple of weeks. After, she’ll visit friends in Colorado, a trip she wasn’t up to making a few months ago.

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Because of her extra-ordinary and personal background as his student and apprentice as well as being considered one of the family, she’s enthusiastically considering a professional recommendation to write a memoir about her experience with this artist and his early days.

It took her nine months to make this dramatic turnaround and overcome more than a decade of sadness and inertia. She got her life back.

“Before and during the beginning of my working with you, I never believed that I would be anything other than dark and depressed.”

There was no way she would have dreamed up or planned the way life orchestrated what’s now happening.

Her change was possible because she:

• Resolved to change
• Got help
• Gained clarity
• Let go of the past
• Unveiled and released beliefs she didn’t know were holding her back
• Learned new tools and perspectives
• Followed the positive voice in her head instead of the negative ones
• Set powerful intentions. 

All of these changed her energy, which led her to be at the right place at the right time and willing to receive her heartfelt desires and happiness… even though they seemed impossible!  

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One month after meeting her old teacher, she sent me this text:

“Still up!!!

I honestly didn’t think it would ever happen.

Thank you for believing in me and teaching me how to be happy.”

After years of isolating herself and being withdrawn from the world, now she “can’t stop talking.”

Her enthusiasm for life is contagious.

She told me, “I can’t thank you enough. You saved my life.”

It’s never too late to do what you love and be happy!

Don’t give up.

It’s worth overcoming your mental chatter and limiting beliefs that you can’t do what you love because of fill in the blank reasons.

You are worth it.

You can be financially successful. You can build your business to stellar levels, enjoy your ideal work or share your gifts in a BIGGER way.

You can be happy.

Starting now, you can create your best life ever! It’s your choice.

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I work with people, at any age, who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support. I help them be richly compensated doing what they love by aligning with their Soul’s goals.
Copyright © 2017 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved.