Archive for the ‘Ease and grace’ Category

You Don’t Have to Push Yourself Harder

February 12, 2018
do it because you love it

What I’m about to tell you is opposite to what most of us learned is the way to achieve success.

Forget about:

  • No pain, no gain.
  • You have to work hard for what you want.
  • Put your nose to the grindstone.
  • Success requires sacrifice, suffering and struggle.

Beliefs like these often don’t create sustainable results nor do they lead to a happy life. Furthermore, trying hard is exhausting.

When we align our positive energy first and then take inspired action with grace and ease, we can create better outcomes while feeling good, too. 


A client, whose career is in the fitness industry, shared how his life is working better.

“I let go of pushing harder. I had the kind of personality to be hard on myself, more disciplined. It left me feeling out of control, especially about things I can’t do anything about.

“I had mind-numbing, self-critiquing all the time. I was looking for approval. 

“Now I see how when I’m softer and centered, I’m in control. It’s easier to be in my own skin. People are more at ease around me because I’m more at ease with myself.

“I make choices moment-to-moment instead of worrying about the future and what others think.

“I catch myself a lot quicker instead of having long periods of anxiety. I chart my course by mentally creating my ideal scenario and letting go of the pushing.

“Week by week, this new way of living life is sinking in as I allow myself to go from efforting to grace and ease. 

“I’ve reclaimed my natural power and feel myself evolving to my true potential as I achieve my goals.”

There was more joy, confidence and lightness in his voice as well.


You can tap into a zone where you won’t need to push yourself. By getting out of your own way, you can get more done with better results and even go beyond limits.

It starts by shifting from trying to relaxing into a flow of doing what you love.

Olympic athletes center and focus themselves before taking action. The winners go beyond worry and ride the wave of their event – even when changing winds seem to be against them. They’re at the right place at the right time to avoid the hazards.

You can, too.

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy this post? Please share.

I work with people, at any age,
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support. I help them be richly compensated doing what they love by aligning with their Soul’s goals.

Copyright © 2018 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved.
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Feeling Overwhelmed?

February 5, 2018

overwhelm

Life is moving quickly. For me, lots of my goals are manifesting, which is a good thing. Because they’re happening all at once, though, I started feeling overwhelmed.

Here are just a few highlights from this week only:

Choosing colors and painting a room; writing copy and meeting with web designers; servicemen working on my computer, completion of installation of antennas on my roof and wiring for a cell phone booster plus my internet; meeting with clients; multiple deadlines; purchasing a variety of new equipment; helping several friends; seeing two new health practitioners; and a toilet that needs a new overflow assembly (what a metaphor). You get the idea. I share this because perhaps, with whatever you’re experiencing, you can relate.

Most of these required many hours of research and learning about stuff I never thought I’d care about, from oscillation of electronic signals to website divis to which surge protectors’ ohms, joules and products actually can protect my various electronic devices. This had to be done before I could even start, purchase correct items; converse with and hire the right people, make intelligent decisions or fix mistakes from when I didn’t know any better.


Creating momentum is a key to success.

However, when catching up started to feel like I was being dragged behind, I knew I was beginning to be out of sync with myself.

The pace didn’t feel good, and I started to feel pressure. I was making great progress, but it wasn’t enjoyable.

Life sends us a HUGE clue that we’ve wandered off the yellow brick road when we’re not feeling good.

Instead of creating a story justifying why I felt this way, I got quiet and listened to my inner voice for guidance.

What I heard was to set an intention for my life to be in divine order, balance and flow.


In the following days, I noticed I was still busy. But things were getting done easier, and I felt more on top of activities instead of getting run over by them. I took time over the weekend to rest, too.

By intending divine order, everything doesn’t happen at once, even if they’re good things.

By intending divine balance, we allow a bigger perspective to orchestrate our lives instead of pushing ahead from a limited viewpoint.

By intending divine flow, we allow ourselves to be in harmony with a natural rhythm of life instead of focusing on chaos, what’s not working or getting sucked into other people’s flows .

From my upcoming e-book 4 Keys to Be Richly Compensated Doing What You Love:

When you get out of your own way, you allow your goals to manifest with grace and ease instead of trying to make things happen.

From my Resolved for Results program:

TIP: If you choose a life of divine flow, but don’t believe that asking for it can make a difference, surrender the doubt, the part that doesn’t believe. Choose to be open and willing to receive what you ask for.

Are you feeling overwhelmed or wondering how you’re going to keep up? Many people are either doing their best to stay afloat or bravely going into the unknown as they take their lives to another level.

Either way, life can be busy and even confusing.

Moving ahead in ways with which you’re not familiar often creates emotional discomfort.

Why? Your inner essence is guiding you forward in a direction so you can have what you want, the change for which you’ve been asking. Your physical brain, on the other hand, doesn’t have new neural pathways in place to make sense of it all… yet. In time, it will.

Setting intentions can be a lifesaver. They take mere seconds to think or say, don’t cost a cent and take no effort. The more you allow yourself to believe and receive, the better they work.

Instead of just putting up with whatever’s going on in your life, ask your inner wisdom for direction.

You can experiment with choosing to be in divine order, balance and flow. What do you have to lose except frustration, overwhelm and stress?

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy this post? Please share.

 
I work with people, at any age,
 who choose to share their gifts
 or business in a BIGGER way
 but don't know how, feel stuck
 or would benefit from new tools
 or support.
 
 I help them be richly compensated
 doing what they love by aligning
 with their Soul's goals.

Stop Working So Hard… Make More Money. Have More Fun!

January 22, 2018

sailboat in wind (2)

  • Last year, she retained her standing as #1 in her company that spans several cities.
  • Her business grew 17% over the previous year, grossing her more money in one year than she’s made in her life.
  • She bought a new vehicle with a $52K price tag that she uses for work, more than she ever thought she’d spend on one.
  • She had fun and takes seven weeks of vacation each year.

How did she do it?

Throughout the year, issues and challenges came up for my client. Each time, during her coaching sessions, we clarified how she could address these.

As a result, her motto, which is featured in bold and colored print at the top of her goals and strategy for the year, is now this:

MY JOB IS TO HAVE FUN!

MY ENERGY IS ALIGNED TO HAVE FUN, WORK LESS, EARN MORE MONEY with GRACE & EASE!

She didn’t always feel this way!

When my client started to work with me, she was a rookie. She used to say, her phone was glued to her hip for fear of missing a call and business.

While practicing what she had been taught was the way to success, she became an addict, addicted to her work. By the way, according to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, a definition of addict is “to devote or surrender (oneself) to something habitually or obsessively.”

However, she came to realize that she was so busy setting herself up for the future that she wasn’t living in the present.

She was living to work, not working to live.

Work wasn’t enjoyable because she believed she had to retire before having fun. Even when she achieved her goal of seven-weeks of vacation a year, she wasn’t enjoying herself.

People began to annoy her. Work became a chore. She began to long for early retirement until she had this awareness:

“Many of us have been brought up to believe that we’re supposed to work hard, put our nose to the grind stone (ouch) and struggle to get ahead. It’s the way we were programmed to think. But this isn’t true.”

That’s the way she thought until she had a wake-up call due to emergency surgery that took her a year before she got her mojo back. Then she knew she had to approach things differently, and she was open to change.

Recently, after a slower schedule during the holidays, she thought she had to “push herself” to start work again after leisurely vegging on Hallmark TV movies. She felt she had to “make herself” get out of what she felt was her comfort zone, even though she didn’t feel comfortable being there any more.

Her old pattern kicked in of pushing herself out of her so-called comfort zone that actually wasn’t comfortable anymore. What she was ready for was to return to her comfort zone.

Consider this:

She was beginning to feel uncomfortable vegging out. If she simply followed what she felt like doing, stop watching so much TV, and switched her focus of attention to business, she’d be in alignment with what her Essence was guiding her to do.

If you’re pushing or trying to make things happen, you’re working against yourself and the guidance your Essence is communicating to you.

There was no need to make re-engaging in work a struggle. Nor did she have to push herself, create a story about how she had to get back to business or tell herself that she had to stop being so comfortable… because continuing to watch TV had become an UNcomfortable zone.

The key was for her to return to her comfort zone, and continuing to watch TV while berating herself was not comfortable.

It was time to consciously align her energy with her inner spirit instead of fighting it.

Responding to shifting winds while riding in a sailboat requires changing course. It’s just part of the sport. When shifting tides in life occur, change course. It’s just part of life. Associated story and drama are neither required nor helpful.

Your Essence will guide you to where you need to be. If you’re not happy, not having fun, not feeling good, pushing yourself or making yourself wrong for not doing more, no matter how you try to justify it, you’re out of sync with your spirit and inner guidance.

How can you work less? How can you make more money? Have more fun!

 


“Reduce your workload by 30% and increase your fun load by 30% and you will increase your revenues by 100%. And you will increase your productivity by 10,000%. (If there could be such a percentage.) More fun, less struggle — more results on all fronts.”


Abraham-Hicks, Excerpted from Salt Lake City, UT on 9/9/00


A reason this works is that you align your energy to receive wisdom from within. When you do this, you’re guided to the very best direction for you. Follow this, and you’re golden.

Principle #4 in Resolved for Results is “… I take action by following through with my inspiration and guidance.”

When you do what you love, instead of working hard, you’ll do inspired work. Because of this, you’ll be more productive, receive better results, make more money, and most important, enjoy your life more.

If you feel stuck in work or activities you don’t enjoy, find something within that scope that’s pleasing to you. It’s there. When you turn your antenna in a direction to receive greater joy, you will be led to more and more of what you love.

With gratitude,

Virginia

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy this post? Please share.

I work with people, at any age,
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.

I help them be richly compensated
doing what they love by aligning
with their Soul’s goals.

Copyright © 2018 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved.

My Personal Experience During a Flood plus a Labor Day of Love with Hurricane Harvey 

September 4, 2017

Hurricane Harvery dog rescue (2)

A little over two years ago, a friend and I enjoyed dinner in a nearby town and casually talked after in the parking lot.

The weather had been unusually beautiful for weeks, and living in a safe community, I even left the back door open to my screened back porch when I was gone.

On my way home that night, the unexpected happened. I turned the corner onto Ranch Road 12 in San Marcos, Texas, and in an instant started driving through forty minutes of treacherous, torrential rain, the likes I had never seen.

I knew if I stopped, the low-water crossings would be flooded, and I might not be able to get back home.

Focus. Focus. Breathe. Relax. Pull over when driving got ridiculously so bad that I couldn’t see a thing. But I couldn’t pause for long; another car might hit me if blinded by rain while on that hilly, winding, country road.

I tapped into the energy of my client John, who likes storm chasing, so I would stop white knuckling the steering wheel.

Arriving home safely, I later learned that neighbors pitched in during the middle of the storm to create a protective barricade. A deluge of water surged from across the street attempting to enter a home two houses away from mine.

The next morning, I awoke with my chest wheezing heavily, gasping for air and sounding like a zombie when I spoke. At first, I thought it was bronchitis.

Even so, I assumed the worse was over. After all, no water had entered my house.

However a few days later, I wondered why my furniture suddenly had a wide swath of green that looked like someone had painted a nearly foot-wide stripe – – and then I found the same streaks across my kitchen cabinets and bathroom. I soon discovered that it got inside my drywall, furniture, kitchen cupboard and on most of the items in my living room, too.

The ferocious, pounding rain and wind hit the ground with such force that it dislodged mold and sent it flying through my open, back door and into my home. When the heat rose to a certain temperature, the mold bloomed.

It took me many months to remove mold from my drywall and home as well as recover from the mental stupor, lack of energy and ill health that mold creates. Add to that the financial impact of not having been able to work beyond taking care of my clients.

It definitely was one of the most challenging times of my entire life. But I got off way easy!!

Twenty miles away on the Blanco River of that Memorial Day weekend, a log jam was created from felled trees and branches… until they let loose. Within three hours, the river rose 33′, cresting at 40′.

People, including a family, were washed away.

Riverside homes, even those out of the flood zone, were ripped apart from their foundations when the force and volume of rising water overwhelmed them. When the flood carried those houses away, and they bobbed down the river, their roofs were knocked off by trees. With nothing to hold the structures together, the houses just fell apart and became rubble.

Overflowing great distances beyond its banks, the rushing water damaged bridges, countless homes and businesses. The landscape changed as huge trees that previously had lined streets no longer existed. FEMA took residence in my small community for months.

  • I was so incapacitated from the mold that I didn’t have the energy to drive a quarter mile out of the way, during my trip to town, to look at where some of the worst disaster hit, let alone help others. The effects of the mold sometimes made it challenging to speak or have the mental clarity to respond during conversations or get out of bed to eat. For a while, with the mold inhabiting my body and mind, I was zoned out as if I was on an opiate drug and couldn’t think or care about anything. It was a rude and frightening awakening when I was able to swim out of my daze. I felt like I’d been under water and had to push myself to the surface and to breathe air again, only to witness the catastrophe that was happening around me in my home, health, personal and financial life.

Years ago, I heard that natural disasters are life’s way of creating a personal growth program. There are gains to be made amidst the crisis.

As bad as it was at the time for me, it was a blessing in disguise.


I can attest that, out of necessity, my harrowing experience forced me to let go of both beliefs that I considered sacrosanct as well as people who I discovered were out for themselves, not for me.

When I did release them, my life became better than ever because some of what I thought were “good and positive” ways of showing up in the world were the very things that had held me back.

When drowning, a survival instinct kicks in. I had to take care of myself or go under. I had no energy to babysit others’ issues or their unconscious, self-serving ways.

Part of my Resolved for Results Mastermind Principle #6 states, “I choose to use my personal empowerment on my behalf, which allows me to serve life more fully.” 

Instead of taking years to understand lessons like this more deeply, I condensed my learning curve into months… including the necessity of letting go of worry and fear.

As life reflects back the energy of our thoughts and feelings, why did I create this? I had been deeply concerned about a business challenge, so I created something else to worry about instead.

And, yes, because I had no energy to hold onto the original issue, the solution manifested during my months-long experience.

“Soulutions” came when I let go of the worry and fear that bound me, making room to be open to answers for which I’d been asking.

Another lesson, ask for breakthroughs with grace and ease.


 

My community recovered as it pulled together in new ways, too. Strong. Compassionate. Having received help from others.

Now during the aftermath of Hurricane Harvey, while remembering that help, individuals, businesses and the local police are returning the goodwill of love to help those in need who are a few hours down the road.

Everyone who’s experienced Harvey will have their own story to tell, what they (had to) let go of, what they learned.

Labor Day is a celebration dedicated to the strength and prosperity of American workers.

On this national holiday of Labor Day, in my part of the world, are demonstrations of labors of love.

How will you celebrate your labors?

With gratitude, Virginia

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy reading this? Please forward.

I work with people, at any age, who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support.

I help them be richly compensated doing what they love by aligning with their Soul’s goals.
Copyright © 2017 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved

TIP: What to Do When You DON’T Know What to DO

April 7, 2016

I felt like I backed myself into a corner.

I was running out of time to complete writing projects – and my deadline was already extended.

My cat kept me up half the night because she was sick.

I woke up with a debilitating headache because when I eventually fell asleep, my head was in an awkward position.

I felt miserable.

Not able to focus on my business for a week because of my project.

Exhausted.

Then, it occurred to me that I’m creating this.

I forgot to consciously create my day through intention.

Instead, I focused on how I was going to get everything done.

I wondered about what I was going to do.

How I didn’t feel well.

And my approach wasn’t working. I felt stuck.

Then, I remembered.

I forgot to choose to be in Divine Flow.

When I did, I stopped pushing.

Took a nap.

Ideas came how I could resolve obstacles to complete my projects.

I started to feel better – physically and emotionally.

My feline friend felt better, too.

To explain what I mean by divine flow, here’s an excerpt from my program Resolved for Results: A Step-by-Step Guide to Do What You Love… even if you failed before, lost hope, are afraid, stressed or confused.

“If you’re struggling or suffering, change your perspective. The struggle may come because you’re trying to control or swim upstream against the current.

“If the going gets tough, maybe you’re going in the wrong direction.

“Life is designed to be in divine flow. If you’re struggling or suffering, you’re going against the flow. Maybe you think you should be acting and thinking a certain way, but that’s actually what’s holding you back and putting you in a flow that’s other than divine. If you are, choose to be in divine flow; continue to choose this.

“Let go of how you think things should be so your focus can shift to the present moment and what is. Allow new perspectives and options to emerge.”

Today’s TIP is simple – for you to implement and for me to share.

Choose to be in divine flow.

It seems to defy logic that this can make it difference.

A few seconds of setting this intention, choosing a belief, sets your day in a positive direction.

You can do this at any time of the day, especially if things start getting wonky.

Observe how your life changes for the better.

You may notice how things change a lot or step-by-step.

Either way, instead of “if it’s not one thing, it’s another,” you shift your trajectory so the track you’re on is “things get better and better.”

Live the life you’re meant to enjoy.

If you have questions or comments, just ask.

NEED BUSINESS? MORE MONEY? – PART 3

June 16, 2011

 Life is energy and consists of frequencies. When you see the best in and for others and treat them that way, you help them broaden their perspective and see a positive image of themselves. This lightens their energy which attracts better results. 

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, 19th century German Renaissance man and writer said, ‘Treat people as if they were what they ought to be, and you help them to become what they are capable of being.” 

Higher frequencies, such as those created with empowering pictures and feelings, magnetize similar energies. When you recognize your unlimited potential and feel anything is possible, illusions of limitation and fear dissipate like the morning fog. 

Others can give you the same gift. 

From the Resolved for Results Course 

Masterminding is ancient

Napoleon Hill popularized the term masterminding in the early 1900s in his classic book Think and Grow Rich.  However, it’s been used throughout the ages from Jesus and his disciples to Bill Gates and Paul Allen who created Microsoft.

At its core, masterminding is the coordination of knowledge and focused attention born from people gathering together in the spirit of harmony with an intention to serve a definite purpose.

Benjamin Franklin formed a mastermind group called the Junto in 1727.  The results? Our first: 

  • Library
  • Volunteer fire department
  • Police department
  • Public hospital
  • Paved streets
  • And the Universityof Pennsylvania.

I consciously began masterminding in 1995 when I facilitated my first success team which used support, brainstorming and accountability. It worked. However, when people didn’t do what they agreed to, their issues soared as their self-confidence nose-dived.

I discovered that when people move forward in the direction of their dreams, they run into the beliefs that hold them back. If they don’t have a crowbar to get out of the crash, they get stuck there.

Can masterminding impede success?

Manifesting works best when feeling self-confident, deserving of success and believing you can do it. But when I watched a college professor shrivel and slump like an eight year old on her own sofa in her own home because she didn’t complete her assignments, I realized why she limited her results.

Over the years, I observed this phenomena countless times. I knew there had to be a way to bypass the emotional sinkholes that people fell into.

The way was revealed to me at a time when I was stuck and DETERMINED to overhaul my life.  I was resolved to change my income, my business, my weight, my house, the struggle, everything – I had had enough. Oh yeah, and I was ready to have more fun, too!

I needed new tools to build a new world for myself.

I didn’t need brainstorming (although it helped) only to be discouraged when things didn’t work out the way we discussed (which seemed to be my norm).

I didn’t need accountability (although it’s a great tool) because an idea often nudged me to actions other than ones I committed to. As I didn’t know where my guidance would take me, I felt that following it was avoiding action I agreed to do. And when I didn’t meet my commitments, I felt like I failed.

I needed to trust myself, see myself succeeding and feel empowered so I could accomplish my goals. It didn’t matter if I worked my plan successfully as long as I felt I could do it and took action. Then, if plan A didn’t work, I’d make up plan X, Y or Z. I’d find a way.

I called a friend, shared my discoveries and asked if she would start masterminding with me immediately. I was desperate for results.

Miracles happened.

  • A retreat facility drastically moved up a deadline and asked for a room commitment in two weeks.  I hadn’t even announced it yet. Instead of giving up, I asked a group to mastermind via teleconference. The retreat not only filled but was one of the best events I’ve had the honor to facilitate. In doing so, I realized great results come from group masterminding by phone.
  • I released 11# of weight in five weeks. 
  • When I shared the idea with others, they wanted to experience it – so business took off for them and me.
  • Projects I’d been putting off for years got done.
  • Life once again became fun.

I realized I was top dog instead of being wagged by the tail.

While there are many types of masterminding, and some are similar to what we now do, this was my journey of discovery of a system that emerged. I call it Resolved for Results because that’s exactly what I was – resolved. As I began to share it with others, a structured program, including a 240 page success manual, evolved that people could depend on to bring results when they used the system.

Here’s what I found.

Creating a word picture where someone can SEE and FEEL their goal, as if they’re living it now, shifts their attitude to possibilities. Action is created through enthusiasm, vision and belief in themselves and their goals. By recognizing their essential connection with their own divinity and uprooting limiting beliefs, they create results with grace and ease that go beyond their wildest expectations

Many mastermind groups use a set of principles. Resolved for Results has its roots in seven beliefs. For example, #7 is “I am grateful which changes my attitude and opens me up to bigger and better things.” 

Now it’s your turn to mastermind for results.

Ask someone you trust to mastermind with the purpose of both of you achieving your goals.

In Part 2, you learned how to choose a goal. Now’s the time you’ll need it.

Have fun with this streamlined version of Resolved for Results masterminding:

  • Say to a partner: “I choose and am willing to receive this or something better:” Then state your goal.
  • The partner responds: Your name, I support your choices, and I see you… then expand the goal by painting a word picture.
  • End the masterminding by saying “So be it.”
  • Say thank you to acknowledge the gift that was given and share how you benefitted from it.
  • Reverse roles.
  • Repeat regularly for best results.

While it’s extremely powerful to mastermind with another person, you can mastermind with God, your guardian angel or anyone on the other side. If you’re a scientist, Einstein would make a great partner!

If you’d enjoy the exhilaration of joining me on a mastermind adventure, go to my website: www.resolvedforresults.com/course.

Groups are forming now – in Austin and by teleconference.

On that note, I’m currently enjoying adventures of my own. 

Although I won’t post my blog for a couple of weeks, I’ll be available by email.

One benefit is you’ll have time to find a partner and mastermind!

My facebook postings will continue. You can follow them by going to www.facebook.com/soulgoals. If you enjoy them, please click LIKE.

I am grateful for the opportunity to share with you and appreciate your comments and feedback.

Now it’s time to create a higher dimension for your life, business and more.

Mastermind to live the life you dream. You can do it.

Choose a goal, and mastermind for it.

I support your choices and see you receiving them. So be it!

SPEAK UP: IT’S TIME TO LIVE YOUR LIFE – PART 2

May 13, 2011

A Tarantula Living Its Life As A Tarantula

It takes courage to see through intimidation. 

There’s a real danger that Yemen will fall to al-Qaida, and their President Saleh uses this to try and control people through fear. The people’s choice: repressive regime or the bogeyman? 

In spite of this potential terror, there are those who no longer are willing to be repressed. And they don’t believe these are the only choices. 

Tawakkol Karman, a female Yemeni activist and writer reported: “We cannot let the bogeyman of al-Qaida and extremism be used to stall historic change in our country; Saleh invokes this threat in an attempt to cling to power, as if he is the only one capable of bringing stability and tackling terrorism. It would be foolish to believe his lies.” 

It reminds me of the empty warning, “no one will ever love you like I do.” Settle for less or be left with something worse or nothing. 

Are you afraid of living your dream? 

What if you try and don’t succeed? 

What-if-the-worse-happens is a tune that plays like a broken record on the shadowy grooves of fear. 

Here’s a mishmash of some of my clients what-ifs: “If I fail, I’ll end up penniless and ashamed, living under a bridge with my dog in a soggy cardboard box, scorned by family and friends saying, ‘I told you so.’” 

What what-if influences you not to live your dreams? What are the odds it will happen?

As Mark Twain said, “I’ve lived through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.” 

You’re not born with fear. You learned it.

The movie The Tale of Despereaux is a lesson on how to train an optimistic mouse to be mousy. (Spoiler alert – they didn’t succeed.) 

The Mother instructed: “You can’t be a mouse if you don’t learn to be afraid… There are so many wonderful things in life to be afraid of – if you just learn how scary they are.” 

The timid older brother adds: “Sometimes they just need to see the older ones do it. No one starts out afraid.” 

Guidance given to the parents: “He won’t be afraid unless you allow him to be afraid.” 

What are you afraid of?

Controlling others through trying to shut them up doesn’t just  happen on the other side of the world. We do it to ourselves. 

We’re all bullied by limiting perspectives and illusions that we believe are true. 

For example, do you avoid any of these? 

  • Confrontation – so you steer clear of people and situations?
  • Contacting someone and being rejected – so you procrastinate?
  • Telling the truth – so you tell little lies as a cover up?
  • Taking action to live your dream – so you settle for existing rather than living? 

Avoidance is another way you terrorize yourself. It’s a way of shutting you up and shutting you down from really living by keeping you in your place. 

It’s time to speak up and be heard. LISTEN to your heart and soul. 

If you want others to listen to you, start by listening to yourself! 

Here are seven steps to help you LIVE your life: 

  1. Breathe deeply in a relaxed way.
  2. Write your ideal life.
  3. Write what your life is like right now.
  4. Ask your soul for clear communication.
  5. What steps can you take to align your ideal and what is?
  6. Take consistent action – even if it’s one small step at a time.
  7. Choose to make changes gently, with grace and ease.

 The answers may differ from what you now think.

At first they may not make sense. You may glimpse a piece rather than the whole puzzle. You may see an image rather than words.

Don’t judge them. You’re opening communication and learning your language. If you’re not sure what the answers mean, ask again.

Take a moment now.

Ask your soul to speak up: LOUDLY so you can hear; CLEARLY so you understand without a shadow of a doubt.

The time to be afraid of the bogeyman is gone.

A rose proudly shares its beauty, even though its life is short. A tarantula boldly lives its life for what it is – a tarantula.

It’s time to live your life to the fullest. Empower yourself by asking your soul to speak up – and listen.

SPEAK UP: IT’S TIME TO LIVE YOUR LIFE – PART 1

May 8, 2011

The top two tactics used by repressive regimes like China are to withhold information, which is harder to do with the internet, and stop people from expressing themselves. 

What about your expression? 

As tempting as it might be to tell your boss, clients, family or friends that they’re idiots in desperate need of an attitude adjustment, it may not be wise. There are times to speak up and times to put things in perspective. 

However, if they cross the line by treating you like yesterday’s trash, then it’s time to express yourself… with as much grace and ease as possible. 

When the pain of withholding is greater than the pain of dealing with a situation, it’s time to express yourself.

This awakening is now happening in the Middle East as expressed on a YouTube video Syria: stand with the protesters.  “They will not be butchered into silence and submission.” 

They have chosen to live their own lives. The consequences of remaining silent surpassed the cost of speaking up. Many are paying a high price for the freedom to express.

I learned this lesson while existing in “a living hell.”

During my twenties, miserable because of a five-year relationship, I had a dream. For the longest time I kept its message on my dresser, although I didn’t know what it meant or how to do anything about it:

 Find the Heart and Rescue It 

It took me a while to realize I lived with a master manipulator. He knew my vulnerabilities and used them to intimidate and emotionally undermine me while bending me to his will. 

I was bullied to let go of my business and with it financial freedom. He listened in on my phone conversations. He even left me stranded in a southwestern desert at 3 PM in the middle of the summer as he drove away – to return 30 minutes later. 

The stress of what my life had become short-circuited my adrenals, thyroid, blood sugar and more – so I wasn’t even able to speak my words in the right order or have physical energy to move. Enabling this was a belief there was something wrong with me.

Human traffickers and terrorists use similar tactics. Intimidate with threats and play on low self-esteem to create a lack of confidence and dread. Immobilize people through fear of what might happen. 

My unhappiness induced me to question and think.  

There was his reality, but was it true? 

How did I get here? I made a bad choice which put me on a sorrowful path. Regardless of good choices I subsequently made, I was still on the wrong path. 

I had to listen to my heart, my truth, and not give my power away. Even if others claimed to know more or be an authority. Even at risk of losing worldly goods. 

Even with my perceived HUMILIATION that, once again, I made a mistake. Actually, it was my ego’s need to protect this self-image that held me back the most. 

My survival ultimately depended on my ability to listen to my guidance, speak up TO MYSELF and not be cowered into obedient “silence and submission.”

When I got honest with me, changes occurred which made my exit easy. I was packed and gone in three weeks. 

What life do you want to live? Are you living it? Are you willing to honestly speak up, at least to yourself, and acknowledge what’s in your heart? 

How can you access your truth? It’s always within you.  

  1. Breathe deeply in a relaxed way.
  2. Call forth your soul. It’s not complicated to do. It’s another aspect of you!
  3. Request clear communication.
  4. Ask questions, such as: 
  • Why are things happening in my life this way?
  • What’s the truth about a situation?
  • What’s the best direction for me to focus on now?
  • What action is best to take?

Write or draw your answers. Journaling is a useful tool to speak out and let you know what’s happening within. 

If you need more clarity, ask again. If it doesn’t come in that moment, it will be made known to you at a better time.

 Ready to make your life easier?

  • Choose to learn your lessons GENTLY.
  • Choose to make changes with ease and grace.
  • Choose to take action on your inner guidance.

 The more you speak up, the more you’ll live your life on your terms. 

In Part Two, you’ll learn 7 steps to LIVE your life and 5 ways to stop giving your power away.

NEED ANSWERS? POP IT IN!

April 29, 2011

 When something went wrong, my old response was to gasp and think: “Oh no. What am I going to do? I don’t know what to do.” I’d repeat it again and again – but I didn’t even realize I was saying it.

 Next came the sickish anxiety in my gut. Fear clutched me like tentacles from a sci-fi film. Solutions had no way to penetrate that thick gunk of worry.

 One afternoon, I discovered that I went over a credit card limit that day. All I could think about were the fees, marks on my credit report and a higher interest rate.

 I noticed a broken record playing in my head. What was it? “What am I going to do? I don’t know what to do.”

 Funny how that mantra sounded like my mother!

 When I heard it, I changed my tune.

 I said to myself, “There’s a part of me that doesn’t have a clue about what to do. There’s another part that knows. I ask my wise self to pop in an answer.”

I Got What I Asked For

 After my request, I relaxed, let the situation go, and left for an appointment. As I walked to my car after my meeting, an idea popped in my head. Drive straight to the bank and pay the overage before the end of the business day.

 When I did and the bank heard my concern, they also extended my credit limit. Problem solved; benefits gained.

 Learning to relax and trust that all will be taken care of, no matter what, helps to wash away the goo of confusion. After all, if God takes care of the flowers and birds, surely you and I rate, too. But what about getting answers?

 A theme found in several Biblical references offers age old wisdom. Ask, and it shall be given to you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.

Put These Together.  Don’t Worry. Ask for Help.

 Now, when I need answers, I place a simple request: POP IT IN.

 For example, I’m writing and get stuck. What I used to do was:

  • Whine: You know the mantra.
  • Worry: “What if I don’t get an answer?”
  • Get angry and complain: “I don’t have time for this.”
  • Feel like a helpless victim: “Why is this happening to me?”

 Now, I ask inwardly for help: “I need a headline. POP IT IN.”

 The answer comes – either immediately or after it incubates for a while.

 Prayers are always answered in divine right timing, Therefore, I let the concern go and do something else. This takes care of the seeking and knocking.

 Taking action refocuses me. It helps me to detach from fixating on results and when they should arrive.

 Easy. Simple. Clear.

Only Supportive Ideas Are Welcome.

 By the way, if an unsupportive idea pops in your head, pop it out. It’s your head, so claim dominion of it. Don’t give your power away to negative thinking. You have the power to pop in or out what goes in it.

 When those supportive ideas pop in, even if they’re a little outside-the-box, act on them. This is a key.

 Remember, everything is given according to your belief. If you allow the possibility, this really works.

 I invite you to experiment. Need answers? Relax and ask inwardly to “POP IT IN!”

READY FOR A CHANGE? 5 STEPS TO MAKE IT EASY

March 15, 2011

In this part of my dream, I was in a room filled with well-worn, cushioned, reclining chairs. I thought there was an available seat near a window that overlooked trees, but it was taken. In fact, every seat I could see was taken except for a too-small-for-me wooden chair at my side. I thought there might be a chair available on the other side of the smallish room. But if I left the wooden chair, someone else might take it, and I could be left with nothing. Then I woke up.

It’s a risk to let go of what’s available, even if it isn’t a fit, uncomfortable and too small. In my dream, there wasn’t a reason why I had to stay in that room, even if there wasn’t a place to sit on the other side.

I awoke knowing to let go of people, attitudes and situations that no longer fit the person I’ve become.

We often settle for things that don’t work when we feel that the familiar is safe and secure – or at least known. This may lead us to believe the unknown is risky.

However, nothing stays the same forever. Economies go up and down. People and work change. A seemingly stable Japan reels with a massive earthquake, tsunami and nuclear explosions.

It reminds me of a woman who didn’t want to move because she enjoyed the companionship of a friend who lived nearby. Soon after, that friend sold her house and moved out of town.

Some are afraid of leaving a job that’s on a downward spiral. Others cling to non-supportive relationships. Some hold onto old business models.  Is something really better than nothing? And who says that replacing something will leave you with nothing?

While writing, I saw a client’s email that I saved three years ago:

I recently met a wonderful woman who was reduced to tears by “friends” she admired but had rejected her. My advice? Don’t waste your time. Look for WONDERFUL people who make you feel good. And focus on your wonderful self who is “crying” to be born and nurtured.

Change is always for good. Something positive always emerges, regardless of appearances. But, you don’t have to wait for a catastrophe to make a change.

What Have You Outgrown?

Are you discouraged, stuck or frustrated about something that hasn’t been working? Are you holding on to a belief about it? This may be the reason your life or business isn’t what you’d like it to be.

Perhaps you only need a change in attitude or perspective. Another viewpoint may reveal the solution.

By the way, don’t think you’ve got to see the big picture and know all the pieces before taking action. You can start where you are and with what you know right now.

TIP: You’re always given your next step – listen within for what it is. You can prevent overwhelm by redirecting your focus on the present and doing one thing at a time.

You can make change easy on yourself by using these five steps:

  1. Be willing to consider a change. Willingness opens you to possibilities even if you’re not ready to commit to a change. 
  2. Take consistent action in your new direction. If you were to make a change, what action would you take? Do it. Then tune in to the next step and do that. 
  3. Get support from a friend or team or coach. Discussing possibilities and being heard can be powerful steps to clarity, action and change.
  4. Choose that the change and lessons learned be gentle. If you believe change is hard, it is. There are people who remain positive even in the face of disaster. Set an intention to make changes with ease and grace. 
  5. Breathe your way through it. Breathing deeply in a relaxed way puts you in divine flow instead of the flow of fear.

Give yourself a gift of a new beginning. You have the power within to create changes without drama, with ease and grace.