Archive for the ‘Complaining’ Category

Fly with the Eagles and Don’t Let the Turkeys Get You Down

July 31, 2017

 

You’re feeling great and in the flow. You can do it. This is your time. Nobody can stop you… until some turkeys start pecking away at you, and you want to run.

Experiencing this way too often, and although she’s at the top of her business, competent and relatively young, my client told me that she couldn’t stop focusing on retirement.

She felt that she could no longer handle the stress created from customers’ unrealistic demands and exhausting herself to get them to see reason.

During her Soulgoals session, she realized that she was attracting people who brought out a quality in her that was like her father – being judgmental. People weren’t acting the way she thought they should.

As like attracts like, she was magnetizing people who would bug her so that she could be “justifiably” judgmental.

To counterbalance her father’s inflexible attitude, she played the role of the peacemaker throughout her life. Now that he’s passed and she’s tired of “battling,” she thought those days were over.

However, his judgmental attitude was still alive inside her because she absorbed his energy, and she continued to attract people that required her to be the peacemaker.

She connected the dots and saw that unless she made inner changes, these patterns would follow her wherever she went – even into retirement.

She was on the verge of letting go of a great career instead of letting go of the unwanted energy she harbored within. It was time to stop blaming others and her business as they weren’t the problem.

Done with attracting challenging people who were like her father, she decided to release her judgmental energy and change her perspective.

“I don’t want to put up with other people’s stuff… my big insight is that if you leave, you’re not going to get away from your issues. Deal with it through journaling.”


Another client found herself consistently attracting unqualified clients.

One got nastily irate when she told him that his application didn’t go through.  Although she quickly let him go as a client, she knew she had to change her focus to stop attracting turkeys.

Whatever is focused upon grows.

In the past, she complained about how many applicants didn’t qualify, so she kept having more applicants who didn’t qualify.

Now, she focuses her attention on having great applicants who both qualify and purchase her high end products, all with grace and ease.

Her new perspective is working.

Are there the same (annoying) types of people or circumstances showing up in your life again and again?

Journal about how you feel when the turkeys get you down.

  • Does how you feel remind you of people from your past?
  • When you notice the patterns, choose to let them go.
  • Replace them with a new perspective.
  • After, refocus on your wonderful dreams and goals instead of what you don’t want.

It’s time to soar with the eagles. You deserve it.

With gratitude,

Virginia

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy reading this? Please forward.

P.S. All stories about my clients’ experiences are shared after having received their permission in advance. Their intention and mine is that others may benefit.

I work with people, at any age, who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support.

I help them be richly compensated doing what they love by aligning with their Soul’s goals.

Not enough time? This story may help you.

July 25, 2017

“I don’t have enough time” was a client’s mantra for a very long time.

On the surface, it was tempting to agree with him.

There’s a side-business where he invests several hours of nearly daily training and research before making decisions on actions to be taken.

Later in the day, he starts his high-level and demanding, Monday – Friday, day job for 10-11 hours each day. This can spill over into weekends for special projects.

Because of past health conditions, it’s essential that he exercises and pays attention to eating well and sleep.

After these long hours, he returns home late to family and household responsibilities.

Maybe you can relate to his busyness in your own way.

As he discovered, there was far more to his lack of time than appearances would suggest.

Unbeknownst to him, it wasn’t his schedule that caused his stress, but the guidance coming from his ego.

Wayne Dyer expressed it well: “The ego is only an illusion, but a very influential one. Letting the ego-illusion become your identity can prevent you from knowing your true self. Ego, the false idea of believing that you are what you have or what you do, is a backwards way of assessing and living life.”

How he set himself up for stress

While discussing his strategy on how he approached tasks, he said that he feels the strong need to jump from one to another in order to keep up with them. He also has an underlying feeling that if he lines up tasks and plans them out, they’d seem too predictable and boring.

Ironically, it’s this strategy that creates predictable and boring outcomes: not enough time, the pressure of a deadline looming over him and stress.

Furthermore, when he completed his tasks under duress, he then had justification, in his mild-mannered way, to drop hints to others about how hard he worked… to get their validation and approval.

His ego loves an audience. By the way, this is a common trait of the ego – whine, albeit subtle and with proven evidence, to get attention and sympathy – even if it’s just your own! Ever feel sorry for yourself?

After reading this, so he could include his comments before posting, he added the following insights:

“I learned as a child that I’d receive attention if I was very upset or sick from headaches. For me, pressure leads to stress, headaches or some physical issue. I learned to keep the pressure off by keeping expectations low.  Then, I’d surprise them with a good result. It is all related.”

As an adult, stress still garnered him attention.  Others could see him as a martyr for working hard.

One more pay-off. The stress of not enough time created an adrenalin rush.

In other words, he became addicted to the drama that stress created because the adrenalin rush was like a drug.

An alternative

Recently, a top supervisor asked him to complete a detailed project.

At first, he didn’t enjoy it. Then, he got into it and “was in the flow” of getting it done.

A co-worker just happened to call.

When his colleague learned about the project, he made a recommendation that saved my client lots of time and allowed him to meet his deadline much faster and easier.

Here are his discoveries about his relationship with time:

  • Even though initially he thought the opposite, jumping from one project to another was predictable and created boring results. It usually caused stress with a hope of getting praise for his valiant efforts.
  • Instead, when he was in the flow while doing projects, miracles unpredictably happened, like someone calling for an unrelated reason and providing solutions.
  • By being in the flow, rather than motivated by stress, he actually saved time because he was open to receive unexpected, better and more time-effective solutions.
  • In the past, he strongly held the belief that the only way he wanted to take action was if he felt fear or worry. Now, he realizes his self-created drama fed a stress addiction, which according to the American Institute of Stress, can be as addictive as drugs.

If you find yourself stressed for success with never enough time, what’s your emotional pay off? 

Release this pattern, and you open the way to greater abundance – in business, money, relationships and a satisfying life.

Start releasing patterns through awareness 

  • Notice when the mind chatter begins, and you want to react the same way you usually do.
  • Instead of dutifully listening to and following your ego’s guidance as if it’s the authority on your life, begin to recognize your old habits when they arise.
  • Know you have a choice – blindly follow the ego like you’ve done in the past or consciously choose to take more empowering action.
  • Choose to be in the flow instead of defending your limited thinking.
  • Create a new story about time. Change your affirmation from “I don’t have enough time” to “I have plenty of time.”

When you cast light on shadows, the shadows disappear.

What do you have to lose? If the other way isn’t helping you, why not try something that might?

With gratitude,

Virginia

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy reading this? Please forward.

I work with people, at any age, who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support.

I help them be richly compensated doing what they love by aligning with their Soul’s goals.

Are Others Affecting How Much Money You Make?

July 17, 2017

A client’s business was doing great when suddenly her success screeched to a halt with only one completed transaction in nearly six months!

Being someone who looks on the positive side, she regularly reported having several deals that were pending or appeared to be sure bets. However, it turned out that each one fell apart for one reason or another.

To top it off, she gave several, well-received marketing presentations that were supposed to bring referrals, but that didn’t work out.

While talking about it during a 1:1 session, she connected the dots.

Her momentum stopped the same month she became the leader of a service group that helps people who are, shall I say, challenged in their housing situations.

In addition to their poverty thinking, she noticed that when her group is together, their conversations drift into drama about their lives.

Add to this a new boss who complains a lot, which motivates my client to schedule appointments so she and her manager are together in the office as little as possible.

At the end of our session together, she realized she had to take better care of her energy.

Three days later during her mastermind team meeting by phone, she shared the following.

Instead of driving with others to do their charitable work, and thinking about butterflies and rainbows to tune out their whining, she took care of herself by driving her own car.

She said, “We have to guard our energy as if our life depends on it, because it does.”

The following day, only four days after her aha moments and after months of setbacks, I received her enthusiastic voicemail.

“I want to let you know it has been a fantastic, fantastic day.”

  • “I met a client last night after we got off our call. He submitted all his documentation immediately, and he’s ready for approval.”
  • Another client of hers had a significant issue that miraculously got resolved, so his deal is moving along.
  • Another woman’s deal is now in the process of closing, too.
  • Plus, she received a call to present to 35 professionals in her target market.

She ignited her momentum by releasing other people’s negative energy and being more attentive to taking care of her own.

Her mastermind team member commented, “The energy of others weaves its way into our lives.”

Wallace D. Wattles wrote in his classic book The Science of Getting Rich, “Get rich; that is the best way you can help the poor. And you cannot hold the mental image which is to make you rich if you fill your mind with pictures of poverty.”

Poverty can come in many forms, such as money, spirit, focus, associations, confidence and beliefs.

Pay attention to the energy others are weaving in your life. How can you take better care of your energy? What unseen energy of others might be taking a toll on you and your finances?

Wondering what to do about it? Ask your Essence. It has your “soulution.”  

With gratitude,

Virginia

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy reading this? Please forward.

I work with people, at any age, who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support.
I help them be richly compensated doing what they love by aligning with their Soul’s goals.

Your Money: Feast or Famine

July 10, 2017

A few months of very sparse sales motivated a former client to once again join one of my mastermind teams to jumpstart his business.

In the last two months, his commission-based income increased dramatically. During a 1:1 session, he outlined every deal he’s closing this summer, totaling over $60,000.

He made a budget before we talked. “The money I’m making will carry me to the end of the year. With it I’ll pay my bills and taxes, buy a new vehicle that I need for my job, set money aside for savings and an emergency fund and get me out of worry.”

Choosing to be fiscally responsible, he felt he could only plan for what he knows for sure that he’ll have.

There were a couple of big telltale signs that he was setting himself up to go from feast to famine. 

First, he reminded me of a bear getting ready for hibernation. The way he talked, it was as if his business would go into a long sleep following the roll he’s now on.

What you see is what you get.

With his vision only focused on generating sales from his current pipeline, his business would only generate sales from his current pipeline. There was no mention of any future business.

Because of his past business scarcity, he was trying to protect himself from another financial shortage. In the process, though, he energetically designed plans for impending famine.

Second, an essential key to manifesting is feeling good first, not waiting until outer circumstances change before you feel good! Like attracts like. Worry does not attract experiences that leave you feeling good.

When we look around at circumstances that suck, it feels natural to complain, whine, get frustrated and angry. But that approach does NOT get us what we want.

I know because I’ve invested much of my life into this strategy. I’ve watched others try to improve their lives by talking about how bad things are.

Things only got worse.

This really is just a habit that digs a deeper hole of misery. It does not create success or financial flow.

Whatever you focus on grows. You’ll feel better focusing on what you choose, not on what you don’t like. (Unless you do that silly “yes BUT” routine of moaning because you’re not there yet… that’s not focusing on what you choose.)

He asked, “How can I know if more money will come if I can’t see it?”

Consider this. Life has a natural flow, and there’s an assumption it will continue without worrying about it.

You trust the sun rises and sets, even if you can’t see it because there are clouds in the sky.

We know, as Jim Morrison said, “No one here gets out alive.” Eventually your heart will stop beating.

Until that time comes, your heart continues to beat. There are steps to take for heart health. Do those. However, there’s no sense living your entire life as if your heart will stop in a few months.

Air is essential to breathe. If there are air issues, address those. However, there’s no sense living your entire life as if you won’t have air to breathe in a few months.

Life has its own flow.

Money has a flow, too.

My client got it. He said, “the beauty is its simplicity. In the past, my thinking about worry created limit.”

He saw how he could trust that the flow will continue in his finances just as the flow in nature continues… unless he stops it by worry.

“It’s insane to be whining, fretting and complaining. Instead, let abundance expand instead of raining on it with negativity.”

He decided “it makes more sense to have clarity, focus and appreciation.”

Allow yourself to trust that you can tap into a money flow. Focus on this flow, not that your money will get divided into little pieces leaving you with nothing.

You are powerful!! Making a choice to be in financial flow, without diluting your energy through worry and negative emotions, can make it so.

If you’re experiencing financial famine, change your focus by looking for natural flows of life.

Connect the dots. If the whole universe runs on flows, you can tap into the flow of financial abundance.

Focus on what you choose.

In the words of Star Trek’s Mr. Spock, “Live long and prosper!”

 

I Confess. I Didn’t Know How to Handle This… Until Now.

June 12, 2017

Arguing earthworms

An acclaimed author and speaker sat across the aisle from me during a shuttle bus ride to a conference.

She was recognized by the woman sitting behind her who started a conversation between the two of them.

Just as the ride ended, with a sweet smile and feigned good intentions that she probably believed were innocent and necessary to express, she trashed the famous person with subtle (not really subtle) advice/put downs.

As an observer, I watched the powerful woman’s face drop as she didn’t know what hit her. While disembarking from the bus, I quietly told her that she didn’t do what the accuser claimed, and the other woman was making stuff up.
­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­


After meditating about me and out of so-called concern, a woman decided to list extensively my shortcomings since the beginning of our friendship. She had a pattern of telling me these every couple of years for fifteen years. Adding insult to injury, her skewed perspective caused her opinions to have more holes than Swiss cheese. Her last sharing was her final one with me.


Can you recall interactions that left you wondering whaa – what just happened?

Or maybe you’ve claimed the title of tell-it-like-you-think-others-should-be-or-should-know-about-themselves.

I confess. In the past, handling crazy-makers like these often left me clumsily dumbfounded and reactive. Maybe a month or a year later, I’d think of a clever yet still unsatisfactory response.

Recently during a session with one of my teachers, the sky opened and fairy dust of understanding gently rained upon me.

I’m sharing my pixie enlightenment about some reasons why others use manipulative behaviors that blind-side and what to do about it.

Also, a heads up if this is your M.O. You may choose to stop it. As Dale Carnegie wrote, the pay off is that you’ll win friends, influence more people and feel authentically better about yourself.

THE WHY:

When people are afraid, they look to fight anybody. They will attack a strong person. (You might be perceived as strong by others, even if you don’t feel that way about yourself).

The underlying, usually unconscious thinking of pointing out faults of a strong person is this: I’m insecure. Let’s see if I can take you down to my level.

It’s someone else’s fault, and they’re going to point it out. “Others” are doing something wrong.

Those who use passive-aggressive behavior look for weak parts and take aim at those frailties. 

  1. It can create self-doubt in the other person and throw them off-balance.
  2. It can invert the strong person’s attention onto themselves and away from the aggressor’s shortcomings.

However, the problem actually rests within them. They don’t want to work on their own issues, so they blame others. Again, the focus is on others and their faults so the perpetrators don’t have to look at themselves.

It reminds me of what Eckhart Tolle said regarding people who complain about others, including other drivers.  Disapproval of others makes their ego feel “morally superior,” even to strangers driving in cars.

Passive-aggressiveness is a self-esteem boosting technique born out of feelings of inadequacy or helplessness. It’s one way to get attention and have people listen, which they might not have experienced in their past. 

In short, one way passive-aggressiveness works is to criticize how others are wrong in order to feel better about themselves, enhance superiority or get something they want. 

WHAT TO DO:

Don’t agree or argue with them. Tell them, “I appreciate what you’re saying, but I don’t agree.”

They want you to defend yourself or argue. If you don’t, they look like an idiot.

Eventually, they’ll stop trying to attack because you offer no resistance. Their attempts to get you to provide fuel to fill up their tank of self-esteem isn’t working (instead of finding it within themselves).

Also, they can’t understand you if you talk with them logically when they’re seeing things emotionally. You’re both on different wavelengths. You can’t hear an FM station when you’re tuned into AM.

People blaming “the others,” be it personally, politically, in business or otherwise, is a scapegoat from looking at their own issues.

Does any of this fairy dust bring clarity to you, your business or work?

With gratitude,

Virginia

P.S. Know someone who might like this? Please forward.

I work with people who choose to share
their gifts or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how or feel stuck.

I help them ignite their Soul’s goals
and be richly compensated doing what
they love.

How You Speed Up (or Slow Down) Money Coming to You

May 15, 2017

A saleswoman told me that people were irritating her – a lot. She was both “losing her cool” and her patience with small thinking, ridiculous behavior and demonstrations of a lack of kindness, consideration and common sense.

To make things worse, she was baffled by her client’s petty issues that almost blew a $1.5 million deal.

It reminds me of the country western lyrics by Billy Currington: “God is great. Beer is good. And people are crazy.”

Recognizing that she’s attracting whatever is going on in her life, she wondered how she created this.

She pieced together cause and effect and saw that her frustration with annoying people was magnetizing others with disgruntled attitudes. Her energy was drawing negative people to her!

By the way, the saleswoman later discovered that the sale represented to her client family disappointments. She was like a volcano ready to explode at anything that could go wrong – or she’d make something wrong to blow off steam.

According to Abraham-Hicks, it only takes 17 seconds to create a thought that attracts more of what you’re thinking and feeling.

Yikes. That’s about a quarter of a minute to design your world – consciously or not.

This is a universal principle. Positive attracts positive; negative attracts negative.

Thoughts build upon each other by attracting other thoughts of a like nature creating thought forms. 17 seconds + 17 seconds + 17 seconds…

Complaining, being hard on yourself, sharing your sad story with others, which invites them to feel as sorry for you as you feel sorry for yourself, attract more circumstances to make you want to pull your hair out.


“When you give your attention to it, if you maintain your focus for as little as 17 seconds, you begin to include its vibration, whatever it is, in your vibration. When you see something you want, and you give it your attention, and you say yes to it, you are including whatever its vibration is in your vibration. When you see something you do not want, and you shout no at it, you are including whatever its vibration is in your vibration.”   


“Most everybody is looking around and vibrating in response to what they are seeing. So, what is the solution? Look around less. Imagine more. Look around less. Imagine more. Until your imagery is the most familiar vibration that you have.”

Abraham-Hicks  


What’s your brain chewing on?

Feel bad because you don’t have more money? You slow down or stop money flowing to you.

Feel good about the idea of having more money? You speed up money coming to you.

Your choice. 

The way out is to decide what would inspire you to feel happy. Then whenever your thoughts turn to the not-so-sunny side of the street, redirect your focus on what creates good feelings.

“I have to face reality” can be the very attitude that holds you back from your heart’s desires.

If your current conditions aren’t what you want, and you continue to focus on them and feel miserable, you’ll get more of the same.

Take care of business, but focus your energy on what you choose to create not on what you don’t like.

You control the way you feel. Don’t give your power away to others or to circumstances.

How would having more money feel? Next focus on other positive ideas about money. Let yourself go to another like-thought. And on and on.

With gratitude,

Virginia

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy reading this? Please forward.

I work with people who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how or feel stuck.
I help them ignite their Soul’s goals and be richly compensated doing what they love.

Copyright © 2017 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved.

What Do You Do When You Don’t Get No Respect?

March 7, 2017

They had some things in common, like their job and movies, but for most everything else they were opposites. Along with being very opinionated, his lunch buddy also had a strong, negative streak.

Although he got under his skin, my client felt obliged to eat with his co-worker a few times a week because of shared projects. Plus, he didn’t want to eat alone.

The tipping point, however, was the guy’s bad habit. When with a group of people, he would diss my client in a joking way.

This time he’d had enough. Later, he went to his colleague’s cubicle and politely yet clearly expressed that he didn’t like when he did that.

Results? His co-worker hasn’t been around for lunch. For the longest time, what to do about this situation was a quandary. When he stood up for himself, the issue went away.

Freedom.

Eventually, what’s no longer in alignment changes in one way or another.

While you may want to hold onto the status quo and are willing to tolerate that which is intolerable, life won’t let you stay that way for long. Things will change.

Although it can seem easier to complain silently or to others, to justify your reasons for what’s not working, or to act like a car with a dead battery, the strategy of avoidance ultimately gets you nowhere.

Another client experienced disrespect from family members. Her antidote was different.

Instead of being frustrated while resisting and railing against them, she opted to find peace within and to stop trying to control the uncontrollable.

Results? Because she changed her energy from anger to peace, others began to respond to her differently. One person even apologized for his former, rude behavior.

If you put up with things because you feel you must, the world has a way of making you evolve. Life’s personal growth program includes natural disasters, illnesses, accidents, divorce, getting fired, losses, caretaking, and even children.

You can choose to no longer put up with stuff. This means adopting a new perspective or doing something to change before change finds you.

Both clients took action, and neither was better than the other – one was outer, to say something; one was inner, to be at peace.

“Claim Your Energy,”  a segment from my program Resolved for Results, begins with this:

People and activities influence your energy to go up or down. It’s imperative to be vigilant about how you spend your time and with whom as well as what you allow into your heart, thoughts, and environment.  

Why? Because people, beliefs, and activities that suck your life force are energy vampires.   

TIP: When you remove what brings you down (or never let it enter in the first place), you raise your energy. In turn, life treats you better because you treat yourself better.

Respect starts with you respecting you.

What do you do when you don’t get no respect?

The immortal Rodney Dangerfield said, “That’s the story of my life.”

You don’t have to make it yours.

“I get no respect at all. When I was a kid, I lost my parents at the beach. I asked a lifeguard to help me find them. He said, ‘I don’t know kid. There are so many places they could hide.'”

Note: Know someone who might like getting more respect? You’re welcome to share this post.

I work with people who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support. I help them ignite their Soul’s goals and be richly compensated doing what they love.

Copyright © 2017 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved.

This Couldn’t Have Happened at a Worse Time

February 27, 2017

James Dick

There I was sitting so close to the piano that, if we both leaned forward, I could touch the hands of internationally renowned concert pianist James Dick. This man of great “talent, vision and class,” is a highly acclaimed competition winner and the founder of the Round Top Festival Institute in Round Top, Texas.

I watched in awe as his fingers nimbly danced across the keyboard while he played mostly by memory. He invoked in his audience indescribable emotions. As a woman who sat next to me said, “We can go a hundred places while listening to that.”

He played a selection by Chopin inspired by a Polish Christmas carol. Softly, sweetly, endearingly.

I was deep in the soul of the music, which touched my heart and ancient memories.

The audience was in quiet reverence, listening.

Then I had to cough. It wasn’t a simple cough. It was like what happens when you swallow something and it goes down the wrong pipe.

During this still and sacred moment, I quickly left parading next to James Dick, coughing my way in front of the mirrors and the entire audience while wearing my bright, yellow shirt.

At the end of the program, I had an opportunity to talk with him. He graciously allowed me to take pictures, too.

First, I asked why he pauses before he plays each musical segment.

“I quiet myself and focus.”

Next came my apology for disturbing his performance and walking next to him in the middle of his playing hushed tones.

After a brief reflection he calmly replied, “I didn’t notice.”

FOCUS.

The man lives and breathes focus. He’s mastered his art so much that he didn’t even notice big distractions!

A couple of my clients are involved with sports that require focus, too.

While kayaking, Melinda told me that if you focus on what to avoid, you’ll hit it. If you focus on where you’re going, you’ll go there.

In mountain biking, Michele told us during a mastermind team meeting that if you focus on obstacles, like the rocks and bumps you go over, you’ll fall. She said that it’s amazing how when you keep your gaze in front of you, where you’re heading, the obstacles don’t effect you and you keep going.

Your life, business, work and finances reflect what you consistently focus on, think about, talk about, complain about, imagine and enjoy – whether you want that thing or not.

In my Resolved for Results program, there’s a segment called Focus on the Donut and not the Hole:

“One group member said, ‘We’re trained to focus on worry. Now I’m retraining my focus on what I choose instead.'”

What’s in your focus? It may be a key to what’s in your wallet and happiness!

With gratitude,

Virginia

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy focusing on focus (or a lack of it)? You’re welcome to share this post.

I work with people who choose clarity and to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support. I help them ignite their Soul’s goals and be richly compensated doing what they love.

 

Are You Running Away From Your Fear?

January 17, 2017

girl-and-stuffed-animal

Your success accelerates and happiness blooms when you let go of fear and the ego’s grasp.

Fear subtly whispers what if the worse happens. It can have you look calm or cheerful, but inside quiet trepidation runs like a persistent, low grade fever. It can breed a full-blown panic humbling you to beg a divine power for help – hoping/doubting if anyone is listening to your prayers or wondering if they’ll bother to answer them.

Fear can masquerade as anger, frustration, pain, avoidance, blaming, complaining, feeling like a victim, sadness, apathy, bullying, guilt, rescuing, suffering as well as every facet of unhappiness.

Fear creates lack of clarity and direction while triggering procrastination or immobilizing you from taking action, dreading that you’ll make a mistake and then you-know-what will hit the fan.

Although miserable to experience, these outcomes provide a compelling distraction from looking at the culprit – your underlying fear.

However, just like in the Wizard of Oz when the curtain was pulled back, there’s nothing substantive to fear.

  1. Fear is only a scary story in your head.
  2. You can more effectively deal with real issues when you’re not emotionally clouded.
  3. You continue to attract unwanted circumstances until you stop running away from your fear, let it go and see it for what it is: a no-thing.
  4. You only attract what you can handle, so there’s no reason to fear anything. 

When you stop thinking and talking about your problems as if you’re in a Stephen King novel, you stop generating your real-life, horror stories.

FEAR = False Evidence Appearing Real.

The ego will lead you to believe that you’ll have more pain if you look at your fear.

However, it’s the embellished, painful narratives of what horrible fate might happen in the future or remembering what happened in the past that snags you.

When you focus on the past and future, you bypass present time, and this is where your personal empowerment dwells.

How can you know if you’re doing this? Listen to your own stories. What’s the timeline – past, present or future?

Ego will play you like a fiddle – directing your attention to what you don’t have (like enough money, time, love, health, direction or success), past and future worries, anywhere but the Now.

If you allow yourself to look at your inner bogeyman, with an intention of letting it go, you’ll find freedom.

Ask for your inner spirit to shine your courage so you can let go of fear and find the tools and support to release what’s holding you back.

You can begin now:

  • Be willing to let go.
  • Ask for help – inwardly and outwardly.
  • Journal to bring clarity and with the intention of letting go.
  • Open to receive a life and business that exceeds your wildest expectations.

When you feel afraid you give your power away. Choose to take it back.

If you don’t get this job or deal, you can get another.

If one way doesn’t work, it’s not the end of the world. Another can be even better. (By the way, I used to be a master at making mountains out of molehills, so I know how much anxiety, pain and self-destruction this habit generates.)

No person, circumstance, financial condition, politician, economic outlook, industry predictions, threats, doctor’s diagnosis, the past or unknown future can affect you unless you let it.

Dwelling on fear or what doesn’t work is emotional quicksand that sabotages your success.

A woman told me about a dream she had with a ferocious lion. Instead of running away, she walked toward it and through it. It had no substance.

You pay a high price for letting fear run your life. Drama. Stress. Challenging relationships. Attracting more fear than money. Confusion. Unconsciously repelling business. Poor health. A life that doesn’t feel like it’s worth living.

You can change now.

Make a decision that instead of listening to the nagging, fear-based story in your head, and judging yourself for having it, you’ll focus on what you choose and what’s working.

Results? You’re happier. Your business and finances grow. You attract love from all the right places. Your health improves.

You’re worth it.

I work with people who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support. I help them ignite their Soul’s goals and be richly compensated doing what they love.

Copyright © 2017 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved.

TIP: Ignite Your Passion

November 1, 2016

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What turns you on?

Do you dutifully go through day-to-day living?

Are you simply trying to make the best of your lot in life or do you complain about it and others?

Or do you know that, if you allow yourself to redirect your focus, your life can be sensational?

A few minutes ago, I returned from a tango performance by an Argentinian dance company.

The audience was wild with excitement.

The precision talent of the dancers, singers and musicians was inspiring.

However, unlike most everyone who watched, it didn’t ignite my passion.

If you’ve read my TIPS lately, you know I’ve attended several performances that sent me soaring.

The common denominator is that each uplifted me. Coupled with extraordinary talent, I walked away smiling a big YES to life.

Here’s what I noticed doesn’t turn me on.

Watching a drunk destroy his life and lose his disheartened woman after causing her misery.

Forcing a woman to be with him against her will – even dragging her.

Rivalry, jealousy and an uncaring spirit.

People being mean and cold to each other.

Violent knife fights.

Yes, this is art, and, of course, there’s freedom of expression.

Perhaps this was all to make a point to demonstrate consequences.

Yes, worse exists in this world.

Personally, I don’t find watching these uplifting or life-affirming.

The energy we fill ourselves with – drama or joy or fear – is what we’ll find mirrored in daily life, too.

I’ve learned a secret.  It’s why some succeed and others struggle.

The secret is found in what you focus on and how it makes you feel.

If you focus on misery and what makes you feel bad, you attract misery in your life.

Focusing on what makes you feel good brings you more things that make you feel good.

A friend told me that she’s turning into her mother – complaining.

The result? My friend felt depressed and hopeless.

She said she was whining and wine-ing too much.

Her mother died of cancer in her fifties. She believes her attitudes ate away at her, just like the cancer.

My friend woke up to what she was doing and made a decision to choose life – change her own attitude; watch what she was putting in her body; take care of herself better; focus on her goals and dreams instead of her limiting situation.

Focusing on negatives or mediocrity can keep you stuck.

You can focus on the bad and the ugly or the good and beautiful.

Remember, where your attention goes, energy flows. You’ll create more of the same.

If you focus on what makes you happy, your life is waay more enjoyable, too.

Feeling good is the master key to manifest the life and business of your dreams.

Life sucks for everyone at times. But where you focus and how you respond is a CHOICE.

Your TIP is to identify one or more things that ignite your passion… and go for it.

Yeah, yeah. You’re busy and have a lot of responsibilities. You gotta make money. You gotta do a lotta things. You really don’t have time. You feel exhausted. Others are depending on you.

You are depending on you, too!

This is your life. What are you doing to enjoy it?

What are you doing to take care of yourself?

What turns you on?

The company of supportive people who unconditionally care about you is a godsend.

This is one of the benefits of our mastermind teams.

For me, I love what I do helping people do what they love so their dreams come true.

And I believe my passion will be ignited when later this week I see The Temptations and The Four Tops in concert. I’ll let you know on my next TIP.

 

Virginia works with people who long to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how or feel stuck. She helps them ignite their Soul’s goals and be richly compensated doing what they love.

For more information on upcoming mastermind teams or a complimentary Do What You Love Break-Free Session, email Virginia at vg@ResolvedForResults.com