Archive for the ‘Coaching’ Category

Guilt, Know-It-Alls & Being #1

November 6, 2017

Wire

Are you in a self-imposed prison with freedom in view?

 

Feeling guilty had been drilled into her by her family throughout her life.

When my client was at the top, business associates and family triggered these guilty feelings by their passive-aggressive behaviors. She felt like she was doing something wrong.

Not feeling good about the price she paid for her success, her sales slipped.

People in her family had jobs. Furthermore, what’s a woman doing being successful, especially in her own business?! They had to work hard in their employment; why should she be any different?

She didn’t realize it was their own jealousy, insecurity, a need to control and their disappointment in themselves for not going after their dreams that were the underlying culprits of others’ manipulative behaviors.

Ever hear of the lobster syndrome or the crab mentality?

When either of these is alone in a lidless container, it can escape.

However, when sharing their enclosure, none can get out because they will be pulled back down, even into boiling water.

In society or business, this can happen when people are bettering themselves, and others try to bring them down.

How can they do that? Through guilt, fear, making others feel they’re doing something wrong, shunning, shaming and the threat of being ostracized if they don’t fit in with the community.

Some religions exert control by indoctrinating their followers with the fear of damnation or how their future lives will be affected.

Previously, my client couldn’t stay away from her cell phone out of fear of missing calls from prospective customers. Working hard is acceptable as a road to success.

So when she fulfilled her goal of a five-week vacation, and still remained #1, it was at the expense of others’ disparaging remarks.

Even though at the top of her game and years away from what most consider retirement age, she couldn’t stop thinking about leaving the business world behind.

She told me about a close friend and business associate. “There’s something about him lately that rubs me the wrong way – so I’ve distanced myself — although we’re working on a deal together. With him, it’s a debate or he knows some expertise about things. He’s done and knows everything.”

She was exhausted by critical people: if it’s not done their way, then in their way of looking at things, it’s being done wrong.

“Because I am surrounded by that thinking and attitude, my cup runneth over with this. My response is to disassociate with people who have these behaviors.”

When I asked where she’s seen those patterns before, she recalled that her mother and sister had the same habit of being critical know-it-alls. Both parents ruled by creating guilt in others.

We discussed that no matter where you go, there you are. If she continued to react, she’d attract more people who would act the same, wherever she went.

She realized that unless she changed, even if she left her business, she’d continue to run into similar, annoying behaviors from others.


Programmed from childhood, traits like lack of confidence, guilt and worry can prompt you to continue brainwashing yourself with limiting beliefs, even when those who put these ideas in your head aren’t around. 

Don’t listen to your inner, critical voice that bullies you and makes you question your ability to succeed or be happy. It lies.

That nagging voice reflects how the people who told you that nonsense feel about themselves. It’s not about you.

Your true essence guides you with a kind, non-judgmental and supportive voice.


Her insight: this session made her step back and look at the bigger picture.

She realized that she won’t be affected by others when she has a different perspective. And when her buttons are no longer pushed, she won’t attract people who think like that.

By the way, she’s back to being #1 and having her best year ever. Life is more fun, and she feels free now that she no longer reacts to guilt trips and know-it-alls in the way she did before.

You can step out of your self-imposed prison of any limiting beliefs, even if you don’t know what’s holding you back.

Start by having confidence that believing in yourself brings.

Remember, those voices to the contrary are figments of someone else’s imagination that they projected on you.

Freedom and success are yours if you’re open to receive them.

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy this post? Please share.

 
I work with people, at any age,
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.

I help them be richly compensated
doing what they love by aligning
with their Soul’s goals.

Copyright © 2017 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved.

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Are Others Affecting How Much Money You Make?

July 17, 2017

A client’s business was doing great when suddenly her success screeched to a halt with only one completed transaction in nearly six months!

Being someone who looks on the positive side, she regularly reported having several deals that were pending or appeared to be sure bets. However, it turned out that each one fell apart for one reason or another.

To top it off, she gave several, well-received marketing presentations that were supposed to bring referrals, but that didn’t work out.

While talking about it during a 1:1 session, she connected the dots.

Her momentum stopped the same month she became the leader of a service group that helps people who are, shall I say, challenged in their housing situations.

In addition to their poverty thinking, she noticed that when her group is together, their conversations drift into drama about their lives.

Add to this a new boss who complains a lot, which motivates my client to schedule appointments so she and her manager are together in the office as little as possible.

At the end of our session together, she realized she had to take better care of her energy.

Three days later during her mastermind team meeting by phone, she shared the following.

Instead of driving with others to do their charitable work, and thinking about butterflies and rainbows to tune out their whining, she took care of herself by driving her own car.

She said, “We have to guard our energy as if our life depends on it, because it does.”

The following day, only four days after her aha moments and after months of setbacks, I received her enthusiastic voicemail.

“I want to let you know it has been a fantastic, fantastic day.”

  • “I met a client last night after we got off our call. He submitted all his documentation immediately, and he’s ready for approval.”
  • Another client of hers had a significant issue that miraculously got resolved, so his deal is moving along.
  • Another woman’s deal is now in the process of closing, too.
  • Plus, she received a call to present to 35 professionals in her target market.

She ignited her momentum by releasing other people’s negative energy and being more attentive to taking care of her own.

Her mastermind team member commented, “The energy of others weaves its way into our lives.”

Wallace D. Wattles wrote in his classic book The Science of Getting Rich, “Get rich; that is the best way you can help the poor. And you cannot hold the mental image which is to make you rich if you fill your mind with pictures of poverty.”

Poverty can come in many forms, such as money, spirit, focus, associations, confidence and beliefs.

Pay attention to the energy others are weaving in your life. How can you take better care of your energy? What unseen energy of others might be taking a toll on you and your finances?

Wondering what to do about it? Ask your Essence. It has your “soulution.”  

With gratitude,

Virginia

P.S. Know someone who might enjoy reading this? Please forward.

I work with people, at any age, who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support.
I help them be richly compensated doing what they love by aligning with their Soul’s goals.

What’s Spring Doing to You?

April 10, 2017

I’ve lived through a few “dark nights of
the soul.” Life or circumstance created
feelings and thoughts that cloaked me
with a heavy pall taking months to release.

Then, just as spring arises from the
barren winter, signs of life within me
determinedly emerged like a phoenix
rising from the ashes.

I understand when people can’t seem to
throw off pervasive feelings that run in
the background like a software program
that’s been slowly and covertly draining
their energy, often for a very long time.

Finally, as if they were running on a low
battery but getting by, the charge is
gone. They can’t take it anymore and
have to do something.

As I ponder what to write to you
today, all I can think about are
several, recent coaching sessions:

People identified specters that lurked
in their shadows for years, haunting
them with their convincing influence
of limitation and disapproval.

______________________________

They courageously pulled back
the curtain that hid their inner
tormenters, which were revealed to
be nothing more than Wizard of Oz
imposters, and freed themselves.
______________________________

Previously, the ego’s dictates filled
their thoughts and feelings like smoke
in a room on fire with little space for
breathing freely.

When the air cleared, the peace
and empowerment of the present
moment shined like the sun on a clear,
cloudless day.

True freedom.

This freedom comes from no longer
being thrashed by past pain or fear
of the future or the hollow echoes that
they, what they do or their lives aren’t
good enough.

______________________________

Maybe you’ve heard those voices in
your head, too – the worrisome talk 
that creates fear, doubt and anxiety
disguised as the voice of reason.

You obediently listened, and now you
don’t take risks or you fritter away your 
energy distracted by blame, shame,
regret, doubts, grief, frustration or
lack that leave you too exhausted to
create the life you really want.
______________________________

Living in the Now even for a moment
brings relief.

The heart freed of shackles, that were
locked in restraint by misty, forgotten
memories, is free to rejoice in renewal,
like the season of spring.

Or is it the spring that can recoil and
stretch to accommodate life’s demands?

______________________________

Living in the Now takes practice, and it
helps to have positive support to
counter the ego’s seduction that tries
to hook you into believing that you can’t
attain the life, business, finances and
happiness you really want.
______________________________

Inevitably, the ego tries to lure you
again with its hypnotic trance of anxiety,
lack, fear, doubt and limit, which results
in dissatisfaction.

However, once the taste of freedom
is savored, it’s proof that peace and
happiness are more than a wishful
hope.

Years of habit have etched neural
pathways in the brain spawning ruts
of discontent.

That all changes when being nurtured
by living in present time as new
pathways gain dominance.

A friend texted for me to write about
never giving up on your dreams.

With an unencumbered
spirit, your dreams or something
even better can come true.

Believe.

P.S. Know others who could use help to be free so they can create a better life and business? Please forward this post.
I work with people who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would  benefit from new tools or support.

I help them ignite their Soul’s goals and be richly compensated doing what they love.

Copyright © 2017 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved. You are receiving this email because of your interest in Virginia’s TIPS.

I Got Miffed When My Coach Did This to Me

April 4, 2017
 
During a year-long, business training, we were given one, 30-minute, private coaching session per month. I skipped some months so I could invest in  extended, one-hour sessions.

The short sessions felt like a race. But, ahhh, finally I’d be able to really explore some topics in depth.

My coach had a different idea that day. Not only was she was on a roll  about subjects she wanted to communicate, but they were off-track for me.

I was blind-sided. Annoyed. I felt like an irritated cat who observed but was silent.

I couldn’t think of a way to derail her  without being rude, even though she was taking away time from my agenda, and I didn’t care about what she was saying. I was left a bit flabbergasted and without words to express myself. (Yeah, I know, weird for me.)

This bugged me so much that later I discussed it with another coach. I wasn’t placing blame on my biz coach, but I wondered why I was bothered. Why couldn’t I turn the session into what I wanted instead of just responding to her direction? ________________________________

The root of my miffedness? I was so focused on trying to be nice to her that I wasn’t nice to ME! I put her feelings above mine.

It was a huge lesson. Don’t  allow other people’s feelings and opinions to have more value than my own.

________________________________

By the way, later when I listened to the recording of our session, what she said wasn’t as bad as I thought. I really needed to hear her in a skewed way to get this lesson!

Recently, I facilitated a coaching session with a masterminder who’s successful, positive and very aware that whatever she focuses on multiplies.

When it seemed impossible to achieve her numbers by the next day to get a bonus, a new client appeared out-of-the-blue. She always wins door prizes. After a break-up from a long-term relationship, a chance meeting landed her an invite to spend the next week at a condo on the coast with wonderful and supportive women – for free!

________________________________

She’s learned the power of masterminding: how to choose what she wants and, with the dynamic of group energy, manifest beyond her wildest expectations. Not only is she  aware of the power of her focused attention, she’s living proof that her thoughts and feelings become reality.

However, there are people in her personal life who see things differently – they believe in a lack philosophy

________________________________

The cup is half full. No sense in making plans because they never work. They complain about how there’s not enough money.

When they expressed their negative views and even dismissed her approach, she politely didn’t say anything. Everybody has a right to their opinion.

Then she woke up, and it felt like a weight was lifted from her when she heard this:

________________________________

Your outer world is shaped by your thoughts and feelings. If you allow others to surround you with their negative energy, it can affect the way you feel. In doing so, you’ve given them power to create YOUR world – for better or worse.

Care about the way you feel. Make feeling good a priority if you care about your business, health, life and ability to prosper.

________________________________

Why let strangers in a car who drive in some loopy way bother you and affect your mood, which can affect your day.. because this can affect your wallet and ability to create the life you choose?

Why allow your energy, the way you feel, to be infused by limiting views on the way life works because you’re trying to be nice or afraid to speak up?

Sounds good, but how?

Sure to bomb: “My well being is a  key to my success. So you need to shut up so I can feel good.”

Delicious in the moment, but that won’t bring you positive results.

Effective: Opt to express yourself with grace and ease.

________________________________

Creatively communicate without making the other person wrong.

How can you take a stand for yourself while being kind? You’re worth it.

________________________________

Yes, play it smart, too. Your boss, friends or family may require a lot of creativity.

I pondered how to inform a health practitioner to stop his limited thinking about the results I could get.

I found a creative way, but that’s another story.

With gratitude,
Virginia

P.S. Know others who could use help in standing up for themselves or changing the way they feel so they can attain greater success? Please forward this post.

I work with people who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would  benefit from new tools or support.

I help them ignite their Soul’s goals and be richly compensated doing what they love.

Copyright © 2017 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved.

TIP: Miracles Happen – In Your Life, Too!

November 23, 2016

rio-2

 

“Miracles can happen always.”

That’s what a nine-year-old said after he ran to catch his nearly 30# baby brother who fell more than four feet from a changing table.

Joseph thought he was aided by divine intervention.

“I would have never caught him, and I can’t run that fast. So I felt like something came and just pushed me forward, and when that happened, I just ran and caught him.”

The moments-long miracle was caught on their security camera:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1spWDYJSXRs

The mother, who turned away only briefly, changed her perspective from what she did wrong to what she did right.

“I was just getting everyone ready for bed. I was home alone with the five kids, and at first I said, ‘I messed up. I did something wrong.’ But then I realized that, really, it was a miracle. I must have done something right to have been deserving of this little guy, running in at the right time and catching him at the right moment.”

Lesson 5 of my Resolved for Results program says this about miracles:

What is a miracle? A miracle is a positive outcome that you didn’t anticipate. It’s when you have no idea how things can work out, and then they do. It’s when results defy logic, and the impossible occurs. It’s when you’re touched by grace.

Miracles compel you to expand your consciousness and go beyond what you think is possible. They are reminders to trust in a friendly and supportive universe that assists you to create your life of choice.

Miracles come in all sizes.

A client and her daughter had ongoing conflicts between themselves.

While coaching, she realized that the fear and judgment she had about her daughter was alienating her.

In the past, she was more of the disciplinarian because she thought that was the best parenting style.

Now, she changed her perspective and approach.

She had an idea to text each of her two adult children separately and tell them how much she appreciates them as well as note their wonderful qualities.

“I love you. You are great. I’m grateful you’re alive…”

She realized that almost all of her fear about “what if” certain things happened to her children weren’t based on anything other than the negativity and drama in her head.

She also gave consideration to her reply when people ask, “How are you?”

Instead of good or fine, automatic responses that people mindlessly give as well as the way they robotically feel about themselves, she decided to say, “I am grateful.”

To change her lifelong habit of how she had been relating to her children, and to feel their positive responses, is a miracle.

We discussed a goal to highlight her intentions.

She doesn’t cook, and throughout her life she was a perfectionist who got anxious if things didn’t go just right.

Yet she longed to have a family dinner.

So we came up with a way for her to create one.

This morning, I received her email.

“I want to let you know that we had a great time last Friday. (She described the food everyone made.) It was a very festive dinner, and I didn’t even get uptight!

“Thank you for guiding me. I am breathing in divine flow and let out judgements and fears to get myself back on track.”

Your TIP, is to open to miracles happening in your life.

Imagine the iconic statue that overlooks Rio de Janeiro, the one found in the above photo, as representing an idea, regardless of your religion.

This omnipotent, omniscient, unconditionally loving and divine presence is watching out for you 24/7.

To experience miracles is to be willing to let go of your problems and worries and allow  yourself to receive something better.

Watch for the miracles in your life. They may be big or small.

Nothing is impossible.

You can receive what you choose or something better.

Happy, Miracle-full Thanksgiving. Happy giving thanks!

With gratitude,

Virginia

I work with people who long to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how or feel stuck. I help them ignite their Soul’s goals and be richly compensated doing what they love.

For more information on upcoming masterminding teams or a complimentary Do What You Love Break-Free Session, email me at vg@ResolvedForResults.com

Copyright © 2016 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved.

Pilates + Doing What You Love = Saturday 10/24

October 16, 2015

Improve Your Moves and Find Your Groove

a Workshop to Align Your Body and

Design Your Life Doing What You Love

When you’re aligned inside and out, your body, thoughts and feelings are strengthened and balanced for you to live the life of your dreams… and your confidence goes through the roof.

Combining Pilates and Do What You Love coaching, you will activate your core support, in body, spirit and daily life, to awaken your natural intelligence. When your core is alive, your posture improves – in how you move your body and find your groove – so you live a passion-filled life.

Energized by the synergy of Lindsey and Virginia, you will come away with breakthrough insights and practical actions to live true to you.

You WILL:

  •  Release tension in body and mind as you dump physical and emotional stress.
  • Create a foundation for effective movement and flexibility to help you move through your life with ease.
  • Find your groove and design a passion-filled life that YOU create where you’re richly compensated doing what you love.
  • Learn a simple tool to transform any confusion and worry into clarity, inspiration and action.
  • Enjoy freedom by getting unstuck – physically, emotionally and mentally.
  • Discover the #1 obstacle holding back your success and an easy technique to stop it.
  • Experience the power of masterminding and how to access it to manifest your goals and dreams beyond your wildest expectations.
  • Reveal how support can help you achieve your goals faster and easier than trying to do everything on your own.

Saturday, October 24, 1-5:30 PM

Vitality Pilates Austin, 508 E. 53rd Street, Unit 100, Austin, TX 78751 

Your investment to live the life you were born to enjoy is $150. Space is limited. Friends and family are welcome!

Call Lindsey now to register at (512)921-2921.

Who Are Lindsey and Virginia?

Lindsey BrannonLindsey Brannan was introduced to Pilates in 1998 while studying at the School of Nashville Ballet. Two years later, an injury ended her dance career, and Pilates took on a new purpose – to build strength and heal her own body. Having received multiple certifications in Pilates, she now helps others to live pain-free.

Virginia Goszewska (go-SHEF-ska) suffered from poor health, finances, VG - lisa 2008marriage, career and everything else that could cause frustration. Since 1992, following decades in international businesses and non-profits as well as her discoveries of how to enjoy a fulfilling life and business, she now helps people to share their gifts, but don’t know how or feel stuck, while being richly compensated doing what they love.

WHAT KEEPS YOU UP AT NIGHT – & 2 SOLUTIONS

November 8, 2012

What keeps you up at night? What scary movie plays in your thoughts and emotions of Halloween past? Can you relate to any of these?

  • Lack of money
  • Business concerns
  • Not enough energy or poor health
  • What to do about relationships at work, home or with friends
  • Tough decisions to make
  • Exhaustion and confusion from stress and overwhelm
  • Insert your (not so) favorite one here

You may also have befriended an attitude that… well, if it’s somewhere between wondering how things can ever work or that you screwed up, an attitude adjustment could begin to solve a lot of problems. Easier said than done when you’re in quicksand.

Why suffer? You don’t have to struggle or settle for less than what you deserve! Or maybe you’re just ready to kick it up to a higher level.

How? Transform your frequency. 

Huh? Speak English, please. OK. Law of Attraction – like attracts like. Think of yourself as a tuning fork. Every tone you play creates a vibration. These either resonate or are discordant with other notes. Some notes are what you like in your life. Others you’d like to send to a universe far, far away. Those are the ones that irritate you like mosquitoes buzzing in the middle of the night – or thoughts that keep you up.

I’m not saying you should change yourself. Whew! That sounds like a Herculean effort. Actually, you’re already more than good enough just the way you are. You may be carrying some unnecessary paraphernalia, aka emotions and perspectives, that skew your frequencies, though. (Imagine playing your tuning fork with an old sack on it that muffles your true tones).

TIP: When you’re angry, frustrated, worried or lashing out at the world because life isn’t going as you think it should, you attract more weird things to match these frequencies. Observe the words and energy you express and change them if you’re not getting the results you choose.

I once saw a woman repeatedly warn her child not to run because he’d fall. She planted the seed. Of course, he fell to comply with the images she drilled into his brain… and then she said, “I told you so.” What are you unconsciously creating? Sometimes it’s subtle and tricky to detect because you’ve lived with the patterns for so long that they feel natural, even though they attract what you don’t want.

It’s easy and commonplace to get so enmeshed in your story and circumstances that you can’t see a way out. A lot of times how could you? The reason you’re in situations is to learn. You may not have the TOOLS to change your approach to reap different results – YET! Let’s face it. If you already got the lesson about why things aren’t working, you wouldn’t be where you are. When you get it, you move on.

How Can You Make the Shift? 2 SOLUTIONS

TIP: Ask for help. Open to receive. There are some things you won’t be able to do on your own. 

Countless times this month I found myself in seemingly insurmountable circumstances that only others could help me with. 10 1/2 hours with a professional, Dan my computer guy, solved technical issues to help my business I stewed over for years! Also, my mastermind partners helped clear my thinking and shared ideas so I could take effective action.

You’re not alone although you may feel that way at times. There are those who’ve walked a path similar enough to yours who understand your goals and obstacles and, most importantly, CAN HELP YOU FIND THE WAY TO ACHIEVE THE RESULTS YOU CHOOSE.

SOLUTION #1 I know how crummy it feels to be stuck. I also know my sessions can help you reclaim your true king (or queen) to remove the Excalibur sword that’s stuck in the stone.

I’m offering you this special for the month of November: WOO HOO! LET’S GET IT ON! 1 1/4-hoursession by phone, Skype or in person for $77 – that’s less than half price!! You read it right.  A $190 value for $77. That’s a savings of over $110!

THIS OFFER IS ALSO AVAILABLE TO CURRENT AND PAST CLIENTS, COUPLES OR BUSINESS PARTNERS FOR THE SAME LOW PRICE!

You deserve the clarity, inspiration, empowerment, confidence, tools and sounding board to get past what’s holding you back so you can take effective action and create results beyond your wildest imagination. But if you’ve never had a session with me or haven’t had one for a while, you may not know how powerful, clarifying and freeing they are – think RELIEF!

May this special offer inspire you to take action and invest in yourself. End your year on a high note. Go into the holidays feeling great with successes to share.

Imagine a stick endlessly circling around an eddy of water unable to connect with the current. With the right influence, it escapes the whirlpool and gets in the flow. Off to a new adventure.

Start your adventure, and contact me at vg@ResolvedForResults.com with questions or to register. PayPal, checks and cash are accepted.

SOLUTION #2 Meet me at the OPEN HOUSE/HAPPY HOUR at the HOLISTIC HEALING & YOGA CENTER in NW AUSTIN for FREE on FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 16, 5:30 – 8:30 PM. A variety of practitioners and myself will share healing modalities… and if you’re inspired by connecting with me there, you can still take advantage of my WOO HOO! LET’S GET IT ON! SESSION for $77.  http://ow.ly/f8s3O

CLICK ON THIS LINK TO LEARN MORE ABOUT THE OPEN HOUSE AND SIGN UP FOR FREE. http://ow.ly/f8s3O

I encourage you to contact me to discover the clarity and motivation you most certainly deserve. It’s your gift to you (unless you’re a really good manifester and receive it as a gift from loved ones).

You can also give this as a unique gift from Santa for someone you care about and love.

Have friends who might be interested? Please spread the word.

Two solutions, two tips and several ideas.

I support your choices and see you manifesting magnificently… and having a great night’s sleep!