Are you listening to your true Essence or the lies of your ego?
A trick of the ego is to have you believe there’s something wrong with you (and “them,” too); you’re stupid; nothing is ever good enough, especially you; others are doing better than you (comparing as if that’s proof that you’re not as good); you’re critical of yourself and others; you shoulda known better; worried what if (the worst) happens; you shoulda, woulda, coulda done things differently; you disapprove of, well, when you think about it, kinda everything, including you, your life, others, and on and on. So…
STOP SHOULDING ON YOURSELF!
What can you do about things right now?
You DO have the ability to change your perspective.
If you CHOOSE to. So, choose to shift.
Your true Essence supports you NOW, 100%, and it’s always guiding you.
Listen, even amidst the noisy ego chatter. The best you can is alright.
Consider another way of looking at things.
Instead, focus on asking yourself, “What did I learn?”
Fast forward to the present moment as you leave the past behind.
Benefit from your lessons and move on to your next adventure.
Life’s a journey. You don’t have to get hung up on any one step of it.
One option is to live your life with as much grace as you can, without judgment.
BE kind, especially to yourself.
Are you DONE with that nagging voice in your head? Contact me for a complimentary Do What You Love Break-Free Session.
I work with people who choose to share their giftsor business in a BIGGER waybut don’t know how, feel stuckor would benefit from new toolsor support. Or maybe would like a more fulfilling life. I help them be richly compensateddoing what they love by aligningwith their Soul’s goals. Email me at: virginia@soulgoals.com
“I’m late, I’m late for a very important date.” Alice in Wonderland
A friend told me, “I have a character defect, and I really have to change it this year.”
She had a hard time being on time.
She said, “If I have A, B and C to do, I try to squeeze it all in, even though I only have enough time to do A. Then I become late. It’s disrespectful to people, and I just have to stop it. This year, it’s got to stop!“
I was born three weeks late, and my mother just accepted my showing up late. It’s no longer working for me, though.”
Her self-deprecating tone became more disapproving the longer she talked. To listen to her, one might think she was headed straight to the bowels of the earth for her misdeeds.
To put it in perspective, though, it was tardiness and not the end of the world.
I told her, “You had an issue. You don’t have to keep bringing up examples of what you did wrong in the past and how bad you think you were while dragging all of that into the present. You made a new decision to be on time. So be it.“
Her reply was, “It’s really so simple, isn’t it? I don’t have to beat myself up or agonize about my habits. Just make a decision to change, and then follow through.”
Have you ever felt miserable and chastised yourself about how you didn’t do as well as you thought you should?
It reminds me of when I was in third grade and took a music test. I was sure I failed. The test scores wouldn’t come back for a week, and I suffered the entire seven days. Why couldn’t I have done better?
I got the highest grade in the class.
That was my first introduction to an idea, “Don’t worry until you have something to worry about.”
It took me years to take it to another level: don’t bother worrying at all. It doesn’t help. Worry and making ourselves wrong actually make our situations worse.
Ready to be ahead of your time?
Let go of your story that you continue to tell about time.
Stop using your stories as a way of getting attention.
If you messed up, you messed up. Learn from it and move on… without the story.
Release the need to justify your actions or get validation from others.
Accept yourself more without adding judgment, blame and shame.
Shift your focus away from your past and refocus on now, your decisions and where you’re going.
Step at a time, and you’ll discover you are in present time.
P.S. Know someone who might enjoy this post? Please share.
I work with people who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new toolsor support. Or maybe would like a more fulfilling life. I help them be richly compensated doing what they love by aligningwith their Soul’s goals.
Decide that this is your year! Contact me for a complimentary Do What You Love Break-Free Session.
“Are you waiting to start living? If you develop such a mind pattern, no matter what you achieve or get, the present will never be good enough; the future will always seem better.”
Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now
Waiting can be a habit producing false hope leading to a dead end.
People spend a lot of their lives waiting for:
friends, partners or their spouses to change or get their act together; waiting for themselves to get their own act together; waiting for someone in business to return their call for the deal of the century; waiting for a man or woman to wake up and realize he or she really did love them; waiting for the other shoe to fall; waiting to be happy; waiting for the doctor’s opinion or to feel better; waiting until their schedule allows, and then they’ll have more time; waiting until conditions are just right or to get someone’s approval before pursuing their dreams; waiting until they make more money and then they can really start to live their lives
… postponing their happiness, their lives, their precious time… for something they thought was coming and would alter their lives dramatically for the better… and usually didn’t.
But if today is simply a means to an end then there is no living in the now.
What are you waiting for?
You have a choice!
How can you live more fully and have more fun NOW?
“Nothing ever happened in the past; it happened in the Now.
Nothing will ever happen in the future; it will happen in the Now.”
Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now
Anxiety and worry reside in many like a low-grade fever that won’t go away. We work, live, and don’t notice it most of the time, but there’s a gnawing in back of the mind that something might happen. It’s a feeling of anticipation, like waiting for the other shoe to fall.
We find countless ways to mask it, such as using power, substances, addictions, sex, control, and anger.
Fear. It’s often fear of the future, the unknown, that somehow, something might happen, and we won’t be able to handle it.
We can never cope with the future. When our mental imaginings run rampant into what danger might be lurking, we incapacitate ourselves.
We can always cope in the now, in this present moment of time. Remember the adage we are only given what we can handle. We always have the ability to make it to the next stage of life.
Always.
“So let me assert my belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself – nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance.”
Franklin D Roosevelt
What else can be done to diminish fear?
If you want yeast to multiply, feed it sugar. If you want fear to grow, feed it fear. If you want to reduce fear, surround what you fear with love.
The aim of terrorists is to create fear and terror. Feeling fear makes them stronger as it’s their food and encourages them to create more terror.
Unconditional love short-circuits them. They become like the Wicked Witch of the West and start to melt. Love cannot ride on the fury of anger.
Thoughts, feelings, and prayers are real and are felt around the world. We have the ability to impact life by living in this moment of time with the spirit of love. Right now as you read this, you can offer love and goodwill to the Life force and let it be distributed wherever It chooses.
Now, you just made a difference.
That which we fear diminishes and eventually disappears as we wake up to this awareness.
Who do you trust, a Higher Power or fear? Hint: Who do you know is the biggest kid on the block, every block, everywhere, throughout eternity?
Consider wearing your fear like a rub-on tattoo. If you switch your attention to the now rather than worry about an unknown future, the fear washes off. Fill the now with love, and not only is there no room left for fear within you, but that which you fear dwindles.
There’s a wonderful Zen story about a Japanese warrior waiting in prison after capture. The fear of interrogation, torture, and execution overwhelmed him, and he couldn’t sleep. Then he remembered the words of his spiritual master, “Tomorrow is not real. It is an illusion. The only reality is now.” He fell peacefully asleep.
Your challenge, if you choose to accept, is to live in the moment with love.
Each time fear rears its head, observe your reaction. Recognize that the fear has nothing to do with this moment in time, and redirect your attention to the now. Breathe. Replace the feelings of fear with gratitude, love, and goodwill to Life.
With a zest for Life, Virginia
Success Thought
“Focus on what you want. Dwelling on your fears will bring them upon you…
We need to enjoy what we have right now and live right now. Fearing loss is not living in the now. Fearing loss is living in the future.”
Andrew Matthews, Being Happy! A Handbook to Greater Confidence & Security
“I am old and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.” Mark Twain
I was sure I failed the test, and like a bully, worry stalked and tormented me for a week. When the scores finally came in, I learned that I got the highest mark in my class.
Although in third grade, I realized that the agony I created served no purpose. After reflection, I thought another approach to future upsets would be better.
I told myself: Worrying doesn’t feel good. And if what you’re worrying about doesn’t happen, it’s a lot of feeling bad for nothing.
As an adult I learned that when there really is a problem, I’m better off to get clear on the issue and then focus on the solution rather than on what’s not working.
If needed, we can accept that we are worrying, without judging the situation or the fact that we are bothering to worry. By choosing acceptance we are no longer prisoner to our reactive patterns. Freedom greets us as we open our cell door. When this happens the worry-jailer’s job is done.
Consider this:
Our programming for worry is based on past situations that created unfavorable results.
We design our future with our present thoughts and feelings.
Therefore, energizing fearful thoughts with worry is a shortcut to what we don’t want to come into our lives in the future.
“For the thing which I greatly feared is come upon me, and that which I was afraid of is come unto me.” Job 3:25
Worry projects us into a world of make-believe what-ifs and creates fear. It’s an indicator that we are living in the future, not in present time.
How do we stay in the present? By surrendering to what is rather than what we think something could or should be. Acknowledging what a situation or person is assists us to be conscious. In doing so, we can see more clearly and take more productive action, too.
If there is a situation that needs addressing, being in the present, rather than in a reactive and emotional state, opens us to receive insights and alternatives more easily.
Humans are wired with the ability to handle life’s situations in this moment of time.
However, we can not cope effectively with mental tapes that project hypothetical, fear-based, future problems.
I was delighted when I read a passage in a great book by Satyam Nadeen.
There’s a part of us that simply watches what’s going on, like seeing a play. I sometimes call it the observer self.
Nadeen refers to this aspect as the Witness. It’s detached about what goes on and doesn’t care about the drama that monkey mind, others or our own, creates about a situation. This drains the life force from worry. In fact, from this vantage point, what we’re worrying about can be rather humorous.
“Each of the countless times a day that the mind or some other person asks ‘why’ about any and every situation that arises (just as a good little mind is supposed to do), the Witness always responds: ‘Don’t know, don’t care!’”
Satyam Nadeen, From Seekers to Finders, The Myth and Reality about Enlightenment
How can we change a pattern of worry? Decide to let it go. Let worry go. Choose to release the habit. Ask the highest part of ourselves to release the pattern and replace it with awareness to navigate through life in a different way… living in present time with grace and ease.
“Nothing can be attained without suffering but at the same time one must begin by sacrificing suffering.”
Gurdjieff
Your challenge, if you choose to accept it, is to look at a situation that’s causing you worry from a perspective of “Don’t Know, Don’t Care.” Consider a viewpoint where letting go of worry supports you to find peace and resolution to whatever is concerning you.
With a zest for Life, Virginia
Success Thought:
Mark Twain once said that one way of getting a silly tune out of your head is to put in another. Instead of the worry tune, you can use Bobby McFerrin’s melodic approach of “Don’t Worry, Be Happy.”
“In every life we have some trouble But when you worry you make it double Don’t worry, be happy Don’t worry, be happy now.”
You can open the window to your thoughts, and think outside YOUR box.
Soulgoal Missive, Year 1, No. 15, originally published in 2001
It was my first singing class. After performing my rendition of a song, my voice coach didn’t comment on my presentation but simply suggested that I approach it using different emotions. Although it was a reasonable request, a sinking feeling came over me and began to take me down with it.
I got through the evening but went home devastated as anguish overtook me far beyond what happened in the class. Three days later I still felt this sickening feeling within and knew that it was totally out of proportion from the event.
Then it hit me.
My (unconscious) interpretation of the comment triggered a belief that when I’m myself, I’m not good enough.
“Why can’t you be more like your cousins Kathy and Sharon?” was one of my mother’s mantras I grew up with — to be good enough I had to be like someone else.
My feelings turned from sadness to freedom as the light shined on this hidden side of me.
The casual remark served as an alarm clock to wake up an old pain after years of sleep. Unconsciously, it directed my actions and responses causing me to feel “I’m not good enough” although there was nothing in the present moment to validate it. After discovering the truth, my life changed.
I hadn’t seen one of my cousins for 18 years, even though she lives just a few hours from me. Yet two weeks after my discovery, I found myself visiting my aunt and her daughter.
Within minutes of our time together, I shared my story with her, and she replied, “Why would you ever want to be like us? The insinuation in our home was that you were special, and we wanted to be like you!”
How often do we create a false sense of reality accompanied by unnecessary limitations and anxiety?
There are so many reasons to experience fear these days, but how many of them are based on reality?
Fear arises from an obscure feeling that something will happen to us in the future that we won’t be able to handle. Then we attach a significance and interpretation that create pain.
The psychological condition of fear is divorced from any concrete and true immediate danger. It comes in many forms: unease, worry, anxiety, nervousness, tension, dread, phobia, and so on. This kind of psychological fear is always of something that might happen, not of something that is happening now.
“You can always cope with the present moment, but you cannot cope with something that is only a mind projection – you cannot cope with the future.”
Eckhart Tolle, Power of Now
What’s the antidote? Get free from allowing your thoughts to rule and instead be the master of what you think and feel.
How do we reclaim our dominion? Focus on the Now instead of some imagined future.
Truly be present and live in this moment in time. This means not obsessing over what happened in the past and not projecting in the future some theorized threat. We learn from the past and plan for the future. We are best equipped to deal with life situations when we are fully present.
Life is what it is. “Resistance is futile” and creates more pain.
We always have the ability to deal with whatever hand we are dealt, although as Mother Teresa said, “I know God won’t give me anything I can’t handle. I just wish He didn’t trust me so much.”
Your challenge, if you choose to accept it, is to disidentify with your thoughts, as if they are you and always the truth. Instead, be the observer of them. Experiment with the following exercise entitled “You Are NOT Your Thoughts.”
Do you imagine that your future will be better or worse than it is now?
Observe yourself focusing your attention into the future. Now shift your attention back to reading in this moment. Notice your ability to shift consciously between the future and present.
The part of you that observes this shift is the real you. You can detach from your identification with your thinking at any moment by going into the observer state – the real you is doing the watching. You experience the real you only in the present moment.
Whenever fear, anxiety, or other such emotion arises, switch to being the watcher of your thoughts and feelings. Even if you still feel trapped by them or feel stuck, you are on your road to freedom, gaining greater self-mastery with every step.
Observation of your thoughts breaks identification with them. You take control of your life instead of being led by fear and limitation. It’s a powerful tool.
With a zest for Life,
Virginia
Success Thought
“Getting there is half the fun; being there is all of it!”
Feeling stalled out or stuck during Covid time? There are ways to free yourself – like untangling or cutting loose a cat who’s balled up in yarn. By the way, just because it’s stuck, there’s nothing wrong with the cat anymore than there’s anything wrong with you!
To help you unravel your stuckness, here’s an excerpt from my program Soulgoals: A Step-by-Step Guide to Live Your Dreams… even if you failed before, lost hope, are afraid, stressed or confused.
A client who emailed a request to her mastermind team wrote, “I have calls out to people, but things seem stuck.” Her goal was well written and specific, including her filling appointments for three cities and a meet and greet.
I felt the fear under her request and called her. She told me she felt pressure because an out-of-state manager was flying in, and she didn’t have appointments scheduled.
We discussed anticipating the best and letting go of expectation. Part of this letting go was a preoccupation with numbers – the number of bookings. Instead, I recommended she focus on the quality of appointments vs. the quantity.
The next night she sent us a long email. “I woke up fresh and energetic, turned things over to my CEO (God)… I decided that I was not going to “push” to “make”anything happen.” [Her bold print]
Results? Before the end of that day, key people either returned her calls to book or called prospects on her behalf to fill the appointments for her! A big client contacted her to book four trainings.
She hosted a successful event that afternoon plus found a perfect venue for a board member retreat following an unsuccessful month-long search.
If you hold onto how you expect life should be, what a person should do or act, or what’s supposed to fulfill you, you not only limit yourself but you block your success and create unnecessary pain and suffering.
Why? If things don’t turn out as you expected, you can get disappointed. However, if you set intentions but stop trying to control exactly how the outcomes should appear, you let go and let God.
Expectations can pull you away from the present moment and foist you into an imagined future of potential disappointment, discouragement, frustration, sadness, anger, or helplessness.
The beauty of the present moment is that it opens you to what’s in alignment with your soul. If one way doesn’t work, there’s a reason. Something better is available… if you allow it into your world.
Instead of longing for what mighta, woulda, coulda or shoulda been, notice the gift of accepting what is. By not resisting, you open yourself energetically to infinite possibilities.
Anticipating the best instead of expecting specific outcomes makes your words more powerful and opens you to results designed for the highest and best interest for all. It’s an important lesson, and I invite you to consider it in case it’s making the difference between creating difficulties or catapulting you to greater success and abundance.
4 Ways to Get Unstuck
It’s important to identify where you feel stuck. Feeling stuck is an emotional response that can leave you feeling there’s no way out. Here are four alternatives that can help:
You’re frustrated because you’re trying to control the outcome by expecting it (or people) to be the way you think it should. Alternative: Relax and anticipate this or something better will occur. Stop trying to micromanage the world. This opens you to tune into new ideas and directions.
You’re beating yourself up with regrets or other limiting thoughts and emotions because of your situation. Alternative: Release judging you, others and your circumstances. Replace it with an empowering perspective that you’re learning, so is everyone else, and all is in divine order and timing.
You’re focusing on how things aren’t working. Alternative: focus on what you choose and the good feeling mojo it creates. Good feeling mojo is what opens you to manifest more quickly and with grace and ease.
You’re pushing to make things happen. Alternative: Stop resisting (and exhausting yourself about) what is and allow things to be the way they are. You getting fussy about it won’t change it or help. Let go. Let God. Set new goals for what you choose. Take action from this perspective.
Feeling stuck may be a clue that it’s time to change direction or attitude. You might have to let go of what you’re holding onto to make way for something even better!
When you shift your energy, you allow life to create miracles and successes beyond your wildest expectations.
Reposted from Soulgoals’ Archives January 25, 2016
Know someone who might
benefit from reading this? Please share.
I work with people who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support. I help them ignite their Soul’s goals and be richly compensated doing what they love.
A woman’s business had been in desperate straits for several months.
Immediately after she started coaching with me, her phone rang with new clients, deals closed in avalanches of abundance and her sales far surpassed her goal of $1 million a month.
However, in the subsequent month, her active deals dropped again to zero.
This was an old pattern of hers – the roller coaster of feast or famine – and it always led to her feeling exhausted.
When I asked about clients in her pipeline, she described how she was frustrated by waiting for them to complete their preparation before they could actively move forward.
Her focus was on waiting to see what they were going to do. Emotionally, the waiting weighed heavily on her. As she had difficulty thinking of anything else, she felt dispirited and immobilized.
Why, when she was doing so well, was this happening… again?
Just like infection-fighting, white blood cells attack germs that have gotten into a wound, your spirit comes to your aid by highlighting germ-like, limiting beliefs you harbor.
How? By surfacing your issues, you have an opportunity to see them more clearly or repeat the typical way you respond. When you see them, you can release patterns that don’t serve you and do things differently.
We frequently are staunch defenders of why we must believe the way we do and stubbornly hold on to the way we look at things. This is why the same limiting circumstances recur repeatedly.
Her inner spirit, once again, revealed the domino effect of her self-sabotage:
She was waiting for something outside herself to dictate her focus, and it froze her into inaction.
Her thoughts made her feel bad.
Thinking about it from this perspective exhausted her.
She felt so deflated that she wasn’t inspired to do anything else.
Then she attracted little business, which matched her deflated feelings.
A more powerful approach was to do everything she could to help her current deals. We talked about new strategies she could implement. Then move on. It’s called NEXT!
She let go of waiting and replaced it with a new action plan. By the end of her session, she felt lighter and energized to move forward.
Her old habit, mentally and physically, was to wait for things to fall into place the way she thought they should before taking action.
This time, she realized she’d do what she could now, and let the rest unfold in divine right timing.
This opened up mental space to let go of her fixation and instead redirect her focus to other activities.
The heaviness she usually felt shifted to the excitement of possibilities.
She became inspired with ideas to take effective action.
Having created a more powerful, energetic center of influence, she magnetized herself to attract more and better business.
Here’s what Eckhart Tolle says about waiting:
“You don’t have to wait for something ‘meaningful’ to come into your life so that you can finally enjoy what you do. There is more meaning in joy than you will ever need. The ‘waiting to start living’ syndrome is one of the most common delusions of the unconscious state.”
“Don’t wait to be successful at some future point; have a successful relationship with the present moment and be fully present in whatever you are doing. That is success.”
“Give up waiting as a state of mind. When you catch yourself slipping into waiting…snap out of it. Come into the present moment. Just be and enjoy being.”
“Waiting is a state of mind that says we want what we don’t have. Therefore, with every kind of waiting we produce an inner conflict between now and the projected future. This greatly reduces the quality of our life. Are you a ‘habitual waiter’?”
Are you a habitual wait-er? If so, you can change, instead of waiting for change, by making new choices!
P.S. Know someone who might enjoy this post? Please share.
Reprinted from March 25, 2019 Soulgoals’ Archive
Tired of waiting to live your dream
or enjoy your life? Contact me for a complimentary Do What You Love Break Free Session.
I work with people
who choose to share their gifts
or business in a BIGGER way
but don’t know how, feel stuck
or would benefit from new tools
or support.
I help them be richly compensated
doing what they love by discovering
their Soul’s goals.
“If you do not run your subconscious mind yourself, someone else will run it for you.” Florence Scovel Shinn
This is a reprint of an email I sent to my clients on March 31, 2014. Now I’m sharing it with you.
While driving, a client told me that he had to pull over to the side of road to scream at his thoughts to shut up.
It reminds me of these lyrics: “You don’t own me. I’m not just one of your many toys… And don’t tell me what to do. And don’t tell me what to say… So just let me be myself. That’s all I ask of you.”
Few welcome being controlled, yet most are controlled by feelings and thoughts they don’t want.
Have you ever been plagued by beating yourself up with worry and fear over money; stress about time or relationships; grief; suffering over the way you look or feel; confusion over what to do; sadness or countless other ways of feeling bad? That’s why many turn to drugs, alcohol, food, over-working and blaming others.
What to do?
Gotta DO something. Ah yes, the default response: analyze, take time to process, wrap your brain around it or intellectually understand.
But here’s the trickster’s game of your ego, which is the false identity you think is you.
Because our computer/ brain was never programmed with how to get rid of these feelings and thoughts, we end up feeling worse because we can’t find answers.
Or we get ideas that we can’t get to make work, blame ourselves… but keep trying ineffective approaches.
As a client said, it’s like going to a dry well looking for a drink of water, and the well is toxic anyway.
Regardless, most have a habit of trying to figure out how to let go of the way they feel, and they often can’t allow themselves to hear anything that doesn’t center around mental solutions. If you’ve done this, it’s an indicator that you’ve given your power to your ego to control you, own you, instead of knowing how to gain mastery of your life.
Results? As like attracts like, if you’re feeling negative you’ll attract more negativity. Positive attracts positive.
If you feel unwanted emotions, who’s having you feel this way? They may have started with childhood messages or emerged because of circumstances, but there’s no one in your head telling you to think or feel this way.
As you’re the one who’s doing it, you CAN choose to do something differently.
Before you start beating yourself up about having beaten yourself up, there’s NOT something pathetically wrong with you. It’s the way the ego works, and we all have one. BUT IT DOESN’T HAVE TO CONTROL YOUR LIFE, MAKE YOU FEEL MISERABLE, DRIVE YOU NUTS OR HOLD YOU BACK FROM MAKING YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE!
Everything is energy, and the energy from thoughts or feelings can be released. They’re only feelings. They don’t have to own you.
Years ago while we were talking, a friend of mine felt anxiety about her upcoming divorce. I suddenly felt anxiety in my gut, but hers was gone. I said I didn’t want it and gave it back to her. We laughed as we bounced the sick in the gut feeling back and forth between us before deciding to let it go. In other words, we could control the presence and absence of this gut-wrenching feeling which meant we could simply let it go.
This includes any feeling!
You can do the same.
Instead of acting helpless in the grips of Robo-Ego, know that you’re in charge and undesirable feelings can leave.
Here are a few tips:
If you want or need something, you’re coming from lack. You’ll be perpetually in a place of wanting instead of having what you choose.
What you resist persists. Although it sounds counter-intuitive, if you don’t like something, you’re holding onto it.
When you let go of trying to control, wanting validation or desiring safety, you can have them.
Ever notice when men or women want a relationship? The objects of their desire want to run. Same thing with money, health or anything.
The freedom everyone longs for breezes in when we let go because then we allow our spirit, our wise self within, to be in charge. It can happen in seconds not years. But we block ourselves from having what we really, really want when we clutch onto yucky feelings in our chest or gut or when we’re stuck in our heads.
There are underlying beliefs we’ve tucked away that impact us, but they can be prompted to surface and be released.
Everyone has the ability to let go although some resist. So, we come back to who owns you?
You DO have a choice.
The ego is at the core of all the lack of success and suffering we experience.
I’m more than happy to share phenomenally effective tools I’ve learned and created to unravel patterns and help you release their incessant drone of control, disapproval and insecurity so you experience true freedom and make your dreams come true.
Those dreams can be anything from financial success to living a better life.
What would feel better? Feeling anxiety or having peace? Wanting success or having success?
If you’d like to learn more about letting go so you can master your feelings and have what you really, really want, please contact me at virginia@soulgoals.com.
I received this email from Kathryn Brown, CEO of Adventure Más, describing results from a recent VIP Letting Go Session. (She creates zip lines and more. How cool is that!) Here’s a practical demonstration of what letting go can do about relationships and money:
Toward the end of my second time participating in Virginia’s program, I decided to try one of her sessions designed to help clear the ego of its default “methods of operation.” At first I resisted. I didn’t want to add anything more to my plate, even knowing that it would more than likely exponentially assist me in clearing old programs that were blocking my progress. I thought, “I can do this later.” It was really no surprise, given the success I had with her program, when I witnessed the synchronicity of events on the day I agreed to do the session.
I realized when I arrived at Virginia’s that I had forgotten my card I had written my issues on for our session. No problem—Virginia picked up on the issues I had forgotten.
It was a great session, and Virginia was very gracious with her time. It was sometime after I got home that I found the card I wrote my issues on and noticed my husband’s handwriting on the back of it. Although I hadn’t gone into any details about what I was going to talk about, he had picked up on many of the issues Virginia and I had discussed and very sensitively and lovingly addressed them bringing me to tears. The issues were about control and security although we had what I considered to be a good relationship.
One of the great blessings was realizing on a much deeper level that everything we think and feel about someone, they know, whether spoken or not.
Our judgments have a big impact on our lives and can block our progress. I began to see how my judgments driven by ego, no matter how quickly I thought I let them go, were really hanging around. My need for control and security was larger than I had imagined.
Additionally, I had a business contract that was ready to renew. Not only did it renew but I was offered more money than before!
What I walked away with were:
Skills I can use in my everyday life when I catch myself in my own ego traps.
I feel much more at peace in situations.
I am very much at ease with who I am.
I’m comfortable with my need for control and security at times—I just love them unconditionally and release them unconditionally.
I have learned to let go of many things I had so tightly hung onto out of an unconscious fear.
The world keeps spinning but I don’t have to.
I would recommend this session to anyone whether you think you are “ready or not”!
Kathryn Brown President & CEO of Adventure Más
If you’d like to learn more about letting go so you can master your feelings and make room to have what you really, really want, please contact me at virginia@soulgoals.com
With gratitude, Virginia
If you’d like to find out more about how you can be free of what’s holding you back so you can live a more wonderful life, contact me for a complimentary Do What You Love Break Free Session.
I work with people who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support.
I help them be richly compensated living a life they love.
Feeling stressed and overwhelmed are times when it helps to be the most centered emotionally and mentally, but it’s often when we feel the worse.
For those who may not be familiar with my story, first, here’s background on why I was on the brink of not knowing how to handle everything. Then, onto my confirmation that this super simple tip works.
The background
One of the most challenging years in my life (and to reach that height is saying something) began Memorial Day weekend four years ago.
Unprecedented flooding occurred when the Blanco River rose to a record 40.21 feet before it knocked out the flood gauge. It took 2 1/2 hours for the water to rise 31 feet as it washed away homes and people to their demise.
Although my house wasn’t part of that disaster, little did I realize this was the beginning of my personal nightmare for six months followed by another six months of new challenges.
I had dinner with a friend in a neighboring town, and left my back door open to the screened porch, when weeks of sunny skies suddenly turned to a violent storm. The rain hit the ground with such ferocity that it jettisoned mold spores into my home.
Long story short, I suffered from mold throughout my house: in my furniture, dry wall, cupboards and me. Inhaling mold not only had me breathing like a zombie but created an opiate effect on my brain so I couldn’t think straight, laid in bed like I was drugged, and sometimes I couldn’t put a sentence together to talk to people.
When I woke up out of this stupor and realized what a fix I was in, I panicked.
Miraculously, instead of years, I managed to get somewhat back on track in six months.
I had about a month of normalcy and then the next crisis came. My cat became very ill.
I suppose most people would have put her to sleep after being told by multiple vets there was nothing to be done when her thyroid levels were over four times what they should be and her weight dropped from 15# to 7# in three weeks.
But she made it clear to me that she wasn’t ready to leave yet.
That came with a price.
For six months, I was awakened by her every night, cleaning up because of her illness, so I could only get three hours of sleep at a time. I can assure you that sleep deprivation over so many months takes its toll. Finally, she let me know it was time to go.
At that point I was exhausted, and my life felt like it was in near shambles.
A trusted coach, who I thought understood my situation and had my back, thought I liked the drama, which she mentioned during a guided meditation for me. Ouch! Maybe she thought because it was just a cat and not a parent that I should’ve put her to sleep against her will.
That was the best and worst of times. The best because years of lessons were condensed in months, not a lifetime.
Talk about overwhelm! My life was assaulted on every level: my physical and brain health, financially, emotionally, unsupported by so-called trusted confidants, my home in disarray, unknown business direction and on and on.
So many things to deal with. I wanted to get my life back and have everything in order yesterday. Every effort seemed so miniscule compared to the task at hand.
How could I ever turn it around?
Just take a step at a time.
Focusing on this simple tip got me out of that deep hole, step at a time.
As simplistic as it sounds, focusing on one project at a time both relieves pressure and fosters progress, as reported by my clients’ experiences, too.
It still works for me.
For example, in the beginning of this year I focused on educating myself with 45 hours of a variety of free, online health docuseries. The result is that I went on a keto diet, my weight is 25# less than it was a few months ago, the arthritis in my lower back is completely gone and I feel the best I’ve felt in decades.
I focused. I was patient with my progress and myself.
Instead of pacing ourselves, we often want to do everything at once, but life usually doesn’t work like that in the long run. Or we end up doing little or nothing except complain about how much we have to do.
During stressful times, it’s easy to feel like a failure. The step at a time approach redirects attention to what’s working and how you’re moving forward and doing well.
If you’re like most people, you’ve got a stockpile of things that need to be done. Maybe you feel discouraged and that you’ll never get ahead.
You can.
Hold the VISION of seeing your ideal life that’s on the other side of your To Do lists or crises, and STEP AT A TIME you’ll arrive at your destination or someplace better.
Could you use support in what steps to take? Contact me for a complimentary Do What You Love Break Free Session.
I work with people who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support.
I help them be richly compensated doing what they love by discovering their Soul’s goals.
Virginia Goszewska (go-SHEF-ska) awakens people to be richly compensated doing what they love by aligning with their Soul’s goals.
Based on decades of extensive research and personal discoveries, Virginia created the unique mastermind and success program Soulgoals: A Step-by-Step System to Do What You Love – even if you failed before, lost hope, are afraid, stuck, stressed or confused. The mastermind is an energy created when two or more gather in harmony for the attainment of a shared, definite objective.
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