| A friend told me, “I have a character defect, and I really have to change it this year.”
She had a hard time being on time.
She said, “If I have A, B and C to do, I try to squeeze it all in, even though I only have enough time to do A. Then I become late. It’s disrespectful to people, and I just have to stop it. This year, it’s got to stop!
“I was born three weeks late, and my mother just accepted my showing up late. It’s no longer working for me, though.”
Her self-deprecating tone became more disapproving the longer she talked. To listen to her, one might think she was headed straight to the bowels of the earth for her misdeeds.
To put it in perspective, though, it was tardiness and not the end of the world.
I told her. “You had an issue. You don’t have to keep bringing up examples of what you did wrong in the past and how bad you think are while dragging all of that into the present. You made a new decision to be on time. So be it.”
Her reply was, “It’s really so simple, isn’t it? I don’t have to beat myself up or agonize about my habits. Just make a decision to change, and then follow through.”
Have you ever felt miserable and chastised yourself about how you didn’t do as well as you thought you should?
It reminds me of when I was in third grade and took a music test. I was sure I failed. The test scores wouldn’t come back for a week, and I suffered the entire seven days. Why couldn’t I have done better?
I got the highest grade in the class.
That was my first introduction to an idea, “Don’t worry until you have something to worry about.”
It took me years to take it to another level: don’t bother worrying at all. It doesn’t help. Worry and making ourselves wrong actually make our situations worse.
Ready to be ahead of your time?
- Let go of your story that you continue to tell about time.
- Stop using your stories as a way of getting attention.
- If you messed up, you messed up. Learn from it and move on… without the story.
- Release the need to justify your actions or get validation from others.
- Accept yourself more without adding judgment, blame and shame.
- Shift your focus away from your past and refocus on now and where you’re going.
Step at a time, you’ll be in front of time instead of behind it.
P.S. Know someone who might enjoy this post? Please share.
I work with people, at any age, who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support. I help them be richly compensated doing what they love by aligning with their Soul’s goals.
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