Why My Girlfriend SCREAMED at Me

My friend told me her predicament while on a phone call. She was out of work, had no money but big dreams. She didn’t want to get a J-O-B because she was afraid it would suck away her time and energy to do what she really wanted. Frustration ensued because she felt that she was here, her dreams were out there somewhere, and she didn’t know how to get over there. Realizing the sensitivity of her situation and feeling her distress, I attempted to offer some words of support that might help her. She replied by SCREAMING at me: YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND. I DON’T KNOW HOW TO DO IT!!! Her passionate yet erroneous belief of having to know how to do something before taking action kept her feeling stuck, depressed and hopeless because she couldn’t  figure out a way out. This happened a few years ago. Currently, she’s working at a job she doesn’t like. She said she’s “matured” and stopped acting out of her helpless, childhood emotions. Although she doesn’t have all her plans figured out, she has a few next steps and is implementing those quite effectively. Often all you really know is your next step. Think Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade – his leap of faith. “You must believe, boy. You must… believe.” https://www.google.com/search?q=indiana+jones+stepping+off+cliff&ie=&oe=#spf=1   Letting “I don’t know how to do it”  and “I gotta figure it out” stop you before you start are siren songs that the ego uses to lure you into keeping you small. Its purpose? It wants you to stay limited under the guise of playing it safe. However, the lack of money and happiness as well as business and personal fulfillment aren’t safe places to be at all! The ego lies. It seduces you into believing that you have to know HOW to do something; it insists you must have the big picture before taking action. This is opposite of how the creative process works. Robert Fritz wrote this in his book  The Path of Least Resistance: “If you ask the “how” question before the “what” question, all you can ever hope to create are variations of what you already have.” Focus on the results, where you choose to be, not on the process or where you are. The way will makes itself known. Here’s a practical example of what happened to me. When I lived in Washington, D.C., I was tasked to find a meeting room for an event. My budget was just a few hundred dollars. After contacting around 20 hotels and facilities, I learned their rates were  $1,000 to $2,000+ for what we needed. None were willing to negotiate as their facilities booked easily. I was ready to give up and report  that this was impossible; my statistics of locations and their costs would  substantiate my conclusion. Instead, I decided to think from the end: 1. Are we going to hold this training here? Yes. 2. This means that a room exists. 3. Find it. The idea came to me to check out a hotel in Arlington, Virginia, located across the bridge from D.C. Voila! The room was the exact, right price plus it had parking and easy access to the highway. If you think that you have to figure something out first, you limit your options. You have limited experience. To go where no man or woman has gone before, you have to tap into a creative power and allow yourself to be guided by it. Another way of saying this, get out of your head and open yourself to infinite possibilities. My Mastermind Principle #3 is: I am open to the mastermind leading me, and I take action by following through with my inspiration and guidance. The next time someone tries to tell you or you scream at yourself that you can’t take action until you know how to do something, until you can “figure it out,” do what Odysseus was told to do when the sirens called to distract him and his men from their purpose. Figuratively speaking, put wax in your ears. Instead, tune into what your inner guidance whispers for you to do. This message is positive, not filled with fear. Before Odysseus and his men left for home, Circe told Odysseus that he would pass the island of the Sirens who would try to lure the men to their deaths with their tempting song. She advised him to put wax in the men’s ears, and if he was determined to hear their song, he should be tied to the mast of his ship. Don’t fall for the song of your ego.  (Pun intended.)

P.S. Know others who spin in circles because they long for change but don’t know what to do?  Please share this post. I work with people who choose to share their gifts or business in a BIGGER way but don’t know how, feel stuck or would benefit from new tools or support. I help them ignite their Soul’s goals and be richly compensated doing what they love. Copyright © 2017 Resolved for Results, All rights reserved.

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Tags: Can't figure things out, I don't know how to, Odysseus, Out of work, Robert Fritz, Siren's song, The how question before the what question, The Path of Least Resistance, Wax in ears